An animal shelter in Australia just wrote the most amazing adoption post we've ever seen

Oh hello, Mr. Biggles.

Also known as Lord Bigglesworth, this dark and mysterious cat is looking for a new home. An adoption agency out of Melbourne, Australia has penned the most incredible adoption post for the cat -- and it's since gone viral.

If you think this cat is going to be all fluffy and lovey-dovey, then keep moving.

Mr. Biggles has some strict rules when it comes to cuddling. "Mr.Biggles likes his cuddles on his terms, and will sit in your lap when he decides it's time. If the stroking is not up to his standards, he will nip you," the agency writes.

In fact, Pet Rescue hilariously describes Mr. Biggles as an "utter bastard of a cat." Sure, this shiny black panther cat may be a looker, but his piercing yellow eyes are quite threatening. "There is some warning that Lord Bigglesworth is displeased with you, his eyes will go dark and tail will start swishing harder," they explain on their website.

You don't want to piss this guy off.

He seems to be a bit high maintenance, too. " Not being fed on time, or allowed to strut across the kitchen benches helping himself to whatever is there is also a tantrum-inducing exercise. Mr. Biggles is a despot and dictator, he will let you know he is not happy, which is often because things are often just not up to his high standards."

The furry feline is only in search of "human slaves" who are willing to devote their lives to Mr. Biggles.

But, in the end, the love Mr. Biggles can offer is priceless. "He will make the right person an exceptional feline companion for life, because when he gives his heart it will be absolutely and fully given without return," the agency explains.

You can view the full letter here.

Now, where can we apply?

Scroll through for another adorable cat:

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