Veggie mold. Grease dripping off the ceiling. Vermin. Miami to Palm Beach restaurant yuck

Mold on food and “objectionable odors” run throughout this week’s Sick and Shut Down List of South Florida restaurants that failed state inspection.

PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU ASK: What follows comes from Florida Department of Business and Professional Regulation restaurant inspections in Miami-Dade, Broward, Palm Beach and Monroe counties. A restaurant that fails inspection remains closed until passing an inspection.

If you see a problem and want a place inspected, contact the DBPR. We don’t do the inspections, control who gets inspected nor how strictly the inspector inspects.

We don’t include all violations, just the most moving, whether internally or literally moving (because it’s alive or once was alive). Some violations get corrected immediately after the inspector points them out. But in those situations, ask yourself, why did the violations exist in the first place? And, how long would they have remained if not for the inspection?

We report without passion or prejudice, but with a doggie bag of humor (and, possibly, indignation).

In alphabetical order...

Auntie Rose’s Soul Food Kitchen, 306 SW 10th St., Belle Glade: Routine inspection, six total violations, two High Priority violations.

All kinds of handwashing sink problems from no way to dry your hands at the one on the cookline, no way to wash (no soap) or dry your hands at the one next to the three-compartment sink and no water — hot or cold — at the handwashing sink by the kitchen entrance.

That’s a lot of dirty paws working with food.

But the six roaches spotted crawling around probably don’t mind.

Auntie Rose passed the next day’s re-inspection.

Beaches Bar & Grill Sunrise Cafe, 4299 Collins Ave., Miami Beach: Routine inspection, 20 total violations, seven High Priority violations.

The inspector noted an “accumulation of debris and dirty towels on the kitchen and warewashing area floor.”

Towels? This is the kitchen of a restaurant named “Beaches,” not the foyer of a Fire Island beach house.

“Commercially processed, reduced oxygen packaged fish bearing a label indicating that it is to remain frozen until time of use was no longer frozen and not removed from reduced oxygen package...already defrosted fish still inside the sealed commercially vacuum package.”

Somebody can’t read, can’t follow directions or both.

A Stop Sale crushed a cracked egg.

Over 15 live roaches scurried behind a kitchen reach-in cooler and around the three dead roaches under a kitchen prep table. Meanwhile, over 10 live roaches ran under a break rack in the back of the kitchen. Over five roaches did the Spider-Man on a warewashing area wall.

Speaking of washing cookware, utensils and dishes, one employee washed dirty dishes, then handled clean utensils without washing hands between acts. Not sure if that’s the same person who washed dishes without sanitizing them. To be fair, the handwash sink at the warewashing station really could be called an awkward water fountain, seeing as how it didn’t have soap or a way to dry your hands.

The buffet area’s syrup was uncovered, meaning it wasn’t “properly protected from contamination.”

But, who protected diners from being punched in the nose by “objectionable odors in the bathroom or other areas of the establishment?” Apparently, there was “sewage water backing up from the drains when the toilets are flushed. Restrooms are located at the front area next to the bar area.”

Beaches got the wind beneath its wings for the next day’s re-inspection.

Brunias Caribbean Takeout Restaurant 2, 7776 NW 44th St., Lauderhill: Routine inspection, 25 total violations, eight High Priority violations.

Someone washed utensils, rinsed utensils, but didn’t sanitize utensils or, for that matter, pots or the blender.

In a reach-in cooler, the “handle of a spoon was directly touching the coleslaw.” This is unsanitary and, in some corners, as bad as raisins touching the coleslaw.

The inspector noticed an “...objectionable odor coming from restroom area and dining room area.”

Olfactory evidence of someone’s regularity? Is that better or worse than evidence of rodent regularity, such as “24 rodent droppings in the dry storage area...five or more rodent droppings in the dishware area on the floor under the three-compartment sink...”

“Establishment has no written procedures for employees to follow in response to a vomiting or diarrheal event where the vomit or diarrhea is discharged onto surfaces in the establishment.”

That’s bad if someone eats the raw okra on a shelf under the microwave, okra covered not with breading but “mold buildup.” Yes, that’s a Stop Sale, as were the dented cans of pot pie mix and spinach.

Brunias (somehow) passed inspection the next day.

Cheers Restaurant and Bar, 8931 W. Oakland Park Blvd., Sunrise: Routine inspection, 39 total violations, eight High Priority violations.

Sometimes, you want to go where everybody knows your name. But, you always want to go where everybody cares a little about cleanliness and food safety.

“No Heimlich maneuver/choking sign posted.” At 39 violations with eight High Priority violations, not only should this sign should be posted prominently, diners should get temporary Blue Cross Blue Shield coverage for any post-meal urgent care or emergency room visits.

First violation listed is the Sick and Shut Down List’s old reliable...”Accumulation of black/green mold-like substance in the interior of the ice machine/bin.” Where? The interior of both ice machine lids, interior of the ice machine and the ice chute had “mold-like substance buildup.”

As if you needed another reason to order your soft drink with no ice in an unopened can...”Observed soda nozzles gun at bar area with mold-like substance and slime buildup...soda gun nozzle holders with buildup of mold-like substance on the interior of the holders.”

Oh, and our pet peeve, “Clean utensils stored between equipment and wall...spatulas and scrapers stored in between reach-in cooler and grill.” They’re not clean any more.

Look up and notice the “ceiling tiles above grills with grease dripping off the ceiling.

“Glasses stored on counter with mesh which has heavy mold-like substance and slime-like substance build up touching food contact surface of glass.” Not sure how this is only a Basic violation, as mold and slime on a food (and lip) contact surface seems pretty High Priority. We’ll ask Cliff Clavin to explain.

“In-use ice scoop stored on soiled surface between uses.”

The fly sticky tape hanging over food, a food prep area or food contact equipment had 20 or more dead flies. Hope it doesn’t lose any grip.

As for the free flies, five were flying around the bar’s garbage bin and one was landing on the kitchen’s hand towel sink.

“Observed severe objectionable odor coming from kitchen area.” When malodorous scents come from the bathroom? Bad. The dining room? Worse. The kitchen? Why are you still here? Do you not have any place to go?

“Sewage/wastewater backing up through the floor drains. Observed gray water coming from the pipe beside the standing reach-in cooler. Water is pouring on the floor by running under the grill area” and coming up through the mat where employees are standing. That explains the stink.

The Jan. 4 re-inspection got “follow-up inspection required,” but there’s no online record of that follow-up inspection.

First Catch Seafood and Grill, 7679 N. State Rd. 7, Parkland: Complaint inspection, four violations, two High Priority violations.

Not-hot-enough water at the employee handwashing sink next to the cookline.

And, the inspector spotted roach hunting.

“Operator exterminated two live roaches under the pot and pan storage rack in the kitchen...exterminated three live roaches on the cookline fryer...exterminated approximately five live roaches in the office area” that wasn’t separated from the kitchen.

First Catch passed re-inspection the next day.

Gym Sportsbar, 2287 Wilton Dr., Wilton Manors: Routine inspection, five total violations, four High Priority violations.

A dozen live roaches gathered under a pair of cookline coolers. Another killed time by the back door. One strolled on a cookline cutting board.

They should’ve gone outside near the garbage, as the inspector dropped Stop Sales on a whole lot of food held in apparently useless coolers overnight. Above the maximum 41 degrees by nine to 12 degrees were hot dogs, raw chicken, cheese, buttermilk and cut cabbage. Basura.

The Gym was pumping it out after re-inspection the next day.

Lalo’s Bar & Restaurant, 1308 Hypoluxo Rd., Lantana: Complaint inspection, 11 total violations, eight High Priority violations.

The live fly on the onion on a kitchen prep table paled in comparison to the walk-in cooler that wasn’t running, just sitting there, not being cool.

Inside were ants; shell eggs at 75 degrees; carrots and cabbage with “mold-like growth.”

The rodents dropped 10 pellets inside one oven; three pellets inside another oven; over 10 under the grill; another 10-plus under the bar’s ice machine; and another 10-plus under a storage room freezer.

At re-inspection, the inspector saw “10 rodent droppings in the filter and motor of the ice machine behind bar.”

Lalo’s eventually passed a re-re-inspection.

Pine Island Ridge Country Club, 9400 Pine Ridge Dr., Davie: Routine inspection, 13 total violations, six High Priority violations.

Not sure how much membership costs at this members only joint, but it can’t be that much because the roaches had a serious party meeting there.

How serious? Well, 15 of them didn’t make it, dead by the ice cream cooler. Another 15 lay dead by the dry storage room. Five bought it inside a wait station cooler. Another three behind the ice machine and four behind the hot holding cabinet.

Pouring some out for the roaches who didn’t’ make it were four live ones behind the ice machine, two live ones near a cookline stove and seven in the dishwashing area.

In the upstairs kitchen, a group of 10 flies got together.

In this week of ineffective coolers, this inspector needed a Stop Sale Infinity Gauntlet for all the food kept unsafely warm. We’re talking cheddar cheese; mozzarella cheese; Swiss cheese; American cheese; provolone; chopped tomatoes; sauteed onions; hot dogs; pesto; chicken wings; turkey; ham; ground beef; chicken salad; yogurt; pico; tuna salad; garlic mayonnaise; tzatziki; and chili. All hit with Stop Sales and tossed for being too warm.

The club passed re-inspection the next day.