We Tried 13 Kinds of Chocolate and These Are the Best
Dark Desires
Sure, you could argue that a surplus of antioxidants is what makes chocolate good for you, but we all know the real reason: It makes you happy. You don't really need an excuse to spend a night in with a delicious chocolate bar, but which one to choose? When it comes to chocolate, there is a whole world of variety — just think about all the different brands of hot cocoa alone. We did the research for you. Here's that chocolate bar guide you didn't even know you needed.
Prices and availability are subject to change.
Related: Taste Testing the Best Store-Bought Chocolate Chip Cookies
Best Chocolate to Serve With Wine
Endangered Species Dark Chocolate
$36 for 12 bars from Amazon
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Endangered Species, which clocks in at 88% cocoa, is dark and bitter, but not insanely rich. The bitterness lingers in a good way, and it makes you want to pair it with something. Maybe a strawberry? Some wine? Cheeseburger? Choice is yours.
Best Chocolate for Feeling Like a Good Person
Tony's Chocolonely Milk Chocolate
$5 from Target
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Roughly 60% to 70% of all cocoa consumed worldwide comes from Ghana and the Ivory Coast, yet it's a region notoriously known for the use of child labor and slavery in cocoa production. The good news is that Tony's Chocolonely is committed to stopping that — it buy cocoa beans directly from farmers and avoids slavery or child labor operations. And the chocolate is tasty, on top of it all.
Related: 25 Specialty Candymakers Worth Seeking Out
Best Chocolate to Have With Tea
Green & Black's Organic Milk Chocolate
$1 from Amazon
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The slightly herbal taste of this chocolate really makes you feel the roots of the cocoa beans — you can tell that they came from the Earth. Add to that the fact that it's slightly intense for milk chocolate, and you've got a perfect tea-side snack.
Best Chocolate to Turn You Into an Actual Living Piece of Chocolate
Montezuma's Absolute Black Dark Chocolate with Cocoa Nibs
$14 for 3 bars from Amazon
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This bad boy is 100% dark chocolate, and predictably, pretty much only for the biggest chocoholics alive. It's very intense. There's a nice touch, however, with the cocoa nibs. They give the bar a great texture, almost as if you're eating a Crunch bar. While 100% pure dark chocolate isn't really our thing, maybe it's yours?
Best Chocolate to Act Like a Fancypants With
Godiva
$51 for 12 pack from Godiva
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Godiva is kind of ridiculous. It treats chocolate like it's high-end jewelry. While it can make you feel like a big ole fancy pants when you eat it, at the end of the day it doesn't matter. It's good chocolate.
Best Chocolate That Resembles Being Healthy
Alter Eco Deep Dark Blackout
$4 from Amazon
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Another non-GMO, organic, and fair trade bar committed to using the best possible ingredients. Give Alter Eco a look if you're concerned about what a Hershey's bar might do to your insides and the planet. It's also made of 85% cocoa, so this is one for those who love intensely rich, bittersweet chocolate with a velvety texture and notes of caramel and stone fruits.
Best Chocolate to Investigate Closely
Theo Milk Chocolate
$7 from Amazon
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Something is off here. The taste isn't quite normal, and while this can generally be an exciting thing, Theo just isn't working. It almost tastes like there's an artificial sweetener somewhere, but Theo uses cane sugar. Something's off.
Best Chocolate to Seduce Somebody With (in the Middle Ages)
Chocolove Milk Chocolate
$3 from Amazon
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This thing screams seduction from the minute you open it. First of all, the thing's called Chocolove. Second, there are XOXOs stamped across the package. Third, the inner wrapping has John Donne's 1633 poem "To His Mistress Going to Bed" written on it. They want you to think of this like some sort of secret love letter. This thing is seduction, top to bottom — the rich, smooth, milky chocolate itself goes right along with all of that.
Best Chocolate to Completely Forget About
Whole Foods Organic Milk Chocolate
$3 from Whole Foods Market
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This is a good bar. It's fine. It will do. It's nothing special. Very middle-of-the-road. You may forget that you even bought it.
Best Chocolate to Make S'mores With
Hershey's
$1 from Amazon
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When it comes to gathering around a campfire and making s'mores, there is pretty much nothing more iconic. You're playing the brand name game here: Honey Maid graham crackers, Jet-Puffed marshmallows, and Hershey's chocolate. Indulge capitalism on this one. You'll be glad you did.
Best Chocolate for Cooking With
Lindt Classic Milk Chocolate
$5 from Lindt
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Lindt is upscale and while it's great to eat, it's even better to cook with. Have you tried putting chocolate in chili? Don't recoil or say it's gross. It's actually a grand slam, and Lindt is perfect for it.
Best Milk Chocolate
Trader Joe's Milk Chocolate
$4 from Trader Joe's
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Trader Joe's, you dunnit again. After a ton of chocolate bars that essentially tasted more or less the same, Trader Joe's was a real revival of spirits. It's smooth, malty, not too rich, and classic. We love it.
Best Dark Chocolate
Valrhona Le Noir Amer Dark Bittersweet Chocolate
Out of stock everywhere
There is a whole lot going on here — fruity notes, sort of a raspberry thing going on — and we are into it. We're big fans of the dark chocolate/berry combo, so this is a winner. Most dark chocolates we tried were focused on slapping you over the head with bitter cocoa flavors. Not Valrhona. This is a full flavor experience. Leave it to the French. If you want it, wait until Amazon or the Valrhona site restocks, because no one has it right now.
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