It’s time to ask ‘Blue's Clues’ host Steve Burns how he’s doing for a change

On Sept. 8, 1996, Steve Burns first popped his head out of the red-curtained window attached to a yellow house during the opening credits of “Blue’s Clues.”

With his prolonged eye contact and thought-provoking questions followed by calming silence, Steve made kids watching at home feel heard, even if they were separated by a screen.

Nearly 28 years later, Burns, now 50, can be found on TikTok doing something similar for his child-now-turned-adult audience.

“Hey, I’m checking in,” Burns says in his latest clip that went viral last month. “What’s going on?”

For those who aren’t checking in with Burns periodically, it might appear as though nothing has changed in the decades that followed his departure from “Blue's Clues” in 2002, since his disposition is so similar to how it was back then.

In his final episode of “Blue’s Clues” over two decades ago, Burns’ character announced he was passing his green-striped shirt duties over to Joe, Steve’s younger brother. For years, fans yearned for closure. While some figured Burns simply moved on with his life, others leaned into conspiracy theories on his whereabouts, many falsely claiming he had died.

But in a viral clip posted to Nick Jr.‘s X account in 2021, Burns addressed the “abrupt” departure and put any rumors of his well-being to rest. He also reassured his fans that he never forgot about them, making 20-something-year-olds weep across the nation.

He's since joined TikTok, providing similar balms to 2 million followers. "I'm checking in. Tell me, what's going on?" he said in a March 20 video that went viral. In the comments, Millennials said that his presence was what they needed following the release of the documentary "Quiet on Set," exposing the dark reality behind their favorite children's shows.

Burns is known for asking how we were doing. What happens if we ask him the same question? We found out. 

“Hey, I’m pretty good. How are you doing?” Burns volleys back to TODAY.com during a recent phone call, saying that 15 minutes would give us “all the time in the world” to get what we needed. 45 minutes later, there was still so much of his story to unpack.

This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Your TikToks have a long stretch of silence that leaves space for anyone to respond, similar to what you did in "Blue's Clues." When did you decide to start doing these videos?

It was shortly after we dropped that crazy viral video where I sort of returned as the host of "Blue's Clues" during the 25th anniversary during the pandemic.

I just kind of said, "Hey, how have you guys been? I've never forgotten about you."

The philosophy of "Blue's Clues" was always about respect, and always about communicating with the home viewer from a place of understanding and without condescension. Back in the day, that meant talking about shapes and colors and graham crackers, but if you simply scale that up, now we're talking about the pandemic and student loans and adulting. We're talking about how difficult it is to move through this life as an adult person, but also how wonderful it is.

“Blue’s Clues” had so much silence in it. I simply wanted to do that. I want to see if that was possible. None of us thought that it would have the impact that it did, and we were so surprised. Then somebody told me I should get on TikTok. I didn’t even know what it was. I said sure, but I just wanted to keep it as simple as possible.

We all remember that viral moment.

It was a profoundly confusing time, and I thought, one that would be better served by a respectful character in a conversation. Not just online, but just interpersonally.

Way back in the day, when the internet was starting to internet, everyone decided online that I was dead, and that actually became a big deal in my life — in not a good way.

I know that everyone who propagated that rumor or laughed at it or thought it was funny or shared it with someone else, thought that they were doing so completely harmlessly.

And I understand that, but the internet provides unprecedented consensus for things that are not true. And it's weird, there's power in these little moments that seem harmless, but when you add them up, they create actual harm.

We see this all the time with the power of cyberbullying and the power that Instagram has to profoundly affect our mental health negatively. This is nothing new. These are not my observations. But I kind of wondered if that's true, is the opposite true? Can we do something really simple, and have a meaningfully positive effect? Is that possible? It doesn't have to be big, it can be micropositive.

How did you respond to the lingering death rumors?

I addressed them for 20 years. I would go on talk shows, check my pulse and say, "Hey, look, I feel great." And yet the internet would think I was dead.

The whole time I was on "Blue's Clues," I was actually struggling with severe clinical depression, and I didn't know, and it was undiagnosed and unaddressed. A death rumor like that wasn't great for my headspace.

Eventually, it really started to feel like a cultural preference. I started to feel, "Wow, would people prefer that I did not exist?" It started to get heavy and feel pretty dark.

Did you have a support system or someone who you could speak to after you left "Blue's Clues"?

While I was on "Blue's Clues," I didn't know what was going on. I knew I had a very good thing going. I knew that I was in every take of every shot, every day, and it was literally my job to be the happiest person in North America — but I didn't really feel that way. I knew that I didn't always feel that way.

It was my job that day to provide America's children with self-esteem, but I didn't always have my own approval. I knew that I was struggling. My strategy was to simply put my head down and fight as hard as I could, because I didn't know what was going on. It turns out, though, that you don't fight depression, you collect it. So that's what I was doing the whole time.

It wasn't until much later in my life that I was able to address it. I simply allowed Steve, the character of Steve, whose job it was to educate everyone else, to become my greatest teacher.

I simply did what Steve did every single day, which was stand there and look someone in the eye and ask, "Will you help me?"

I can't stress that enough. That is the great lesson that Steve taught me: There is no shame in asking for help. Sometimes you need that person to listen, and asking for help is not an act of weakness. It's a confrontational act of strength, actually. It sound simple, but that act was the most transformative act of my entire life. And it's a lesson I learned from Steve, which is a cool, full circle moment.

It's so beautiful that what you needed existed in Steve.

I've often wondered — my best friend actually suggested this to me — that maybe part of why the kids were so willing to help Steve was because they could tell that maybe Steve was a guy who was needed some help. Kids are pretty smart and intuitive.

Even talking to you, I can sense your way of listening. It aligns with your TikTok videos, but also your character Steve and how he listened.

The listening philosophy is from Fred Rogers. Most of children’s television talks to the camera. That’s sort of an established convention of kids’ TV. What I think “Blue’s Clues” did, one of the more breakthrough aspects, was that we listened to the camera. And it was my job to try to make that as viable and believable as possible, and as specific as possible.

Fred Rogers says that listening is one of the greatest gifts that a person can give another person. I love that because it’s so easy to think listening is something passive. Like, “Oh, I’m sitting here, receiving your information.” But it’s not, it’s actually giving the gift of your attention. When we pay attention, we’re making an investment in someone else. And that’s the basis of compassion, in a lot of ways. Fred Rogers was the master of all, I do believe that guy should be on our money.

I worry that these TikToks are making me seem like a therapist or someone who has some kind of greater understanding. My hope is that I just come off as a fellow passenger on the struggle bus, an ally. It’s just like, “Yeah! Hey, me too. I’m right there with you. This is hard.” I’m still trying to figure this stuff out. And I still struggle, all the time. I am not a person who’s trying to present himself as having the answer, but I am trying to model active, deep listening as part of the solution.

Is there a method to looking like you're deep listening in your TikTok videos, even though there's silence and you don't know what's happening on the other side?

I just go until the silence feels loud. And I lean into it, so that something active is actually happening. I’ll listen deeply to the sounds in the room. I’ll play little games. I’ll be like, “Oh, what’s the feeling if I try to listen with my eyebrow?” What’s most important is that something is actually happening. I guess it’s a little actor-y and wonky, but it’s not that hard. I’m just kind of sitting there, listening, making space and giving attention.

Is there ever a reason for when you post one of these TikToks?

I’d like to say there’s some grand strategy to it, but there’s really not. There was one time when I was watching the news and I was like, “Oh, my God, this is insane.” I sat down, and I was like, “Yo, this feels crazy right now. How are you doing?” It’s a very simple gesture, and I don’t have a big philosophy around it ... that’s part of what makes it kind of cool, is that anyone could do this.

In your latest TikTok, people are comparing you to Elmo, who recently had a tweet go viral. Do you see Elmo and yourself in a similar light?

First thing I thought when Elmo went viral, I was like, “Yeah, well, Elmo just ate my lunch.” But I do love Elmo. The reaction to Elmo was much more wild and sort of sarcastic and ironic and funny.

I think that’s because Elmo will always be a highly mediated experience. Because of the voice and because he’s a puppet and because he’s such a character, Elmo really can’t relate to you peer-to-peer the way a simple, middle-aged adult can sit there and look into a camera. Elmo has an extreme character between his question and your answer. I think Steve and Elmo are always going to hit different.

In terms of being in the same bucket, I love Elmo. Hilarious. Almost a legend. I’m psyched to be associated with "Sesame Street" whenever that happens. We’re both doing the same thing.

I think people right now really want to be spoken to as an adult from a place of joy from their childhood. I don’t know exactly why, but it does seem to be in the zeitgeist.

Where is your relationship at with "Blue's Clues" now?

I love it. It was a struggle for me back in the day because, you know, undiagnosed severe clinical depression. Also, because I had never intended to be on a children’s television show, and so I felt enormously miscast and enormously unqualified. Now I just see what an outrageous gift that was. I couldn’t have asked for anything cooler.

I’ve been behind the scenes now, writing, directing, and with the reboot, Steve comes back every now and then, and he’s the world’s crappiest detective. I love doing that. I love being Steve more than I ever have. But what I really love is this idea of just simply continuing the authentic conversation that we started a million years ago.

I love the idea of exploring that, so I’m doing a podcast that will be out soon, where it’s just, “Hey, lets you and me talk about hard stuff.” We’re calling it “Steve Burns Alive.” We’re just going to pick it up and continue talking about the hard stuff. Yeah, very simple, much like the TikToks, much like the viral video.

I love that. Well I'm going to finally let you go, but I really appreciate you giving me all these thoughtful answers. I told you, I grew up with "Blue's Clues," so it means so much.

I’m happy to talk about this stuff. And Nicoletta, thank you so much for all of your help in the day. You did all the work. Let’s be serious, I never found any clues, really. That was all you.

This article was originally published on TODAY.com