The best date night ideas to help shake things up, according to relationship experts

When was the last time you had a memorable date night out with your sweetheart?

If it's been a minute, you might want to consider putting one on the calendar, because whether you two been together forever or are a brand new duo, carving out couple time is essential to keeping the flame alive.

However, coming up with new ways to spend time together can sometimes be a challenge, which is why we've tapped the experts to help pull together a list of the best date ideas.

After all, romance is the glue that keeps you and your beau together and even the strongest of relationships can benefit from regular one-on-one time.

"Couples should go on dates regardless of how long they have been together. One of the most important keys to a lasting relationship or marriage is never to stop dating," says Jaime Bronstein, licensed relationship therapist and author of the book "MAN*ifesting."

"A relationship or marriage can become stale if a couple doesn’t try to keep the spark alive. Relationships take work on both parts. You need to nurture your relationship and give it the respect and dedication it deserves if you want it to last," Bronstein tells TODAY.com.

According to Bronstein, an easy way to keep things fresh is to try or do new things together.

"When a couple has new experiences, they benefit emotionally and physically because their neurotransmitters start shooting, which results in the couple feeling excited and bonded," she explains.

When it comes to planning date nights, Bronstein recommends being intentional about spending time together.

"Set aside time dedicated to focusing on the two of you – no work, no kids, nothing else," she says. "Prioritizing your relationship can be a game-changer and will help you reconnect instantly. When both people feel loved and cared for, they feel more motivated to be an active participant in the relationship."

Here are some of Bronstein's suggestions:

  • A surprise date. It’s important to have fun while dating, and part of keeping up the spark is to be surprised. Designate one person as the “surpriser” and the other as the “surprise-e.” The surpriser must plan a date from start to finish. A fun addition to this date is to blindfold the “surprise-e” until they reach their destination.

  • Pretend it’s your first date. This is for a couple who has been dating for a while. Over a romantic dinner, play the role of first daters. Ask each other questions you already know the answer to about one another, but do it in a flirty way. For example, “Do you kiss on the first date?” I promise that when you kiss at the end of the date, it will feel as if it was the first time again!

  • Body art date. Depending on how many dates you’ve had, you can either do this at a studio that offers this service or get some paint and cover your floor with a sheet. The purpose of this date is to have fun while getting closer. Ideally, both people would be wearing bathing suits, which automatically puts you in a vulnerable position, and it’s a way to check out how each other looks without not having a lot of clothes on. Dip your hands in paint and create a masterpiece on each other’s bodies; as you can imagine, this can simultaneously be sensual and playful.

  • Cook a meal and feed your blind-folded date. This date is playful and romantic, “50 Shades of Gray-esque.” Designate who will be the cook and who will be the one blindfolded and trying the food. Depending on your comfort level, you can do a lot with this date. You can make it as sensual or as playful as you want it to be. After one course, switch positions so both people can be fed while blindfolded.

  • Philanthropy date. Find a cause that resonates with both of you and volunteer your time together. It feels good to be philanthropic, and watching your date do something nice for people in need is attractive.

  • Go to a Toastmasters class together. Public speaking can be nerve-wracking for some people, but once you do it, you feel a rush of adrenaline and a sense of accomplishment. It could be a turn-on if two people were to go out of their comfort zones together and cheer each other on. Go for celebratory drinks or dinner afterward.

  • The “restaurant hop” date. Go to one restaurant for appetizers, the next one for the main course, and a third restaurant for dessert, and if both people are into port or espresso martinis, they can go to a fourth restaurant for that.

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“Couples should be dating each other throughout their entire relationship,” Stephanie Mintz, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells TODAY.com. “But how and why we date can change at different stages in the relationship.”

Don’t put too much pressure on yourselves to come up with the perfect “date night” scenario, though. A date doesn’t always have to involve dressing up and getting tickets or a restaurant reservation. “[Those types of dates] are great for celebrating or relaxing, but they shouldn’t become the majority of your dates,” Mintz says.

Here are Mintz's date night suggestions:

  • Visit a pop-up museum. Make do on that promise to see it before it closes.

  • Attend a local art or music festival. Indulge in some local culture as a couple.

  • Take a cooking or baking class. Preparing meals or desserts together can bring you closer as a couple.

  • Go to a wine and paint evening. Hang your handiwork somewhere as a souvenir.

  • Have a picnic. Fill a basket or purchase a pre-assembled charcuterie board, perfect for date night.

  • Take a sailing lesson, if you live by the water. Sailing is very much a collaborative sport.

  • Try out a virtual reality game. Play as a team or against each other in lighthearted competition.

“Scheduling date night is an investment into the longevity and quality of your relationship," psychiatrist Dr. Rhonda Mattox tells TODAY.com. “Think of date night as the gift that keeps on giving.”

Here are her suggestions:

  • Get tickets to a comedy show. “Nothing breaks down barriers and brings people together better than laughter,” Mattox says.

  • Pair an outdoor activity with a picnic. Go horseback riding, sailing, hiking or kayaking, then follow it up with a light lunch you’ve packed.

  • Take a walk on the wild side. Up the ante with your activity and go bungee jumping, snorkeling, or something else that’s been on your bucket lists.

Senior couple at the lake having a picnic (Halfpoint / Getty Images/iStockphoto)
Senior couple at the lake having a picnic (Halfpoint / Getty Images/iStockphoto)

“Creating fun and meaningful dates doesn’t mean you have to spend a lot of money or partake in lavish experiences,” Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, relationship expert and co-founder of OURS, a premarital counseling platform, tells TODAY.com.

Here are some of Earnshaw's simple date ideas:

  • Plan a new date based on past great dates. Think of the greatest hits among your past dates, then plan new ones that combine the best parts of them to create new memories.

  • Plan a date within set boundaries. Use parameters to narrow down the planning for your next date. For example, choose an activity that costs less than $50 or takes place within a 5-mile radius of your home.

  • Share your vision of a perfect date. Earnshaw offers this prompt: “Before I met you what I imagined a perfect date was …” Take turns planning your dream dates.

Cheryl Grace is a relationship and lifestyle coach and founder of Powerful Penny, a transformative lifestyle brand. She believes it’s important to find something you both like doing, even if it means learning something new together. Bonus points if the activity makes you laugh and feel energized.

“I love dating my husband! We’ve reached an age where we both appreciate new experiences that turn into fond memories,” Grace tells TODAY.com. “We discovered each other late in our lives and value spending time with each other.” She notes that one of their favorite standing dates is an early morning cycling class followed by breakfast together.

Here are some of her date suggestions:

  • Take a portable speaker outdoors. Grace and her husband enjoy watching the sunset over a lake as they listen to tunes.

  • Read a book aloud to each other. Grace giggles whenever her husband grabs the romance novel she’s reading and narrates it to her using different voices. Try it out with one of your own reads.

  • Take a regular walking or bike route together. Grace suggests taking a selfie to show the passage of seasons on your route.

Young couple riding a tandem bicycle on a boardwalk (Hello World / Getty Images)
Young couple riding a tandem bicycle on a boardwalk (Hello World / Getty Images)

“The happiest couples I know are the ones who keep the romance alive, the ones that make an effort to put deposits into the relationship account when life so often is taking withdrawals from the account,” Andrea Dindinger, a San Francisco-based licensed marriage and family therapist, tells TODAY.com.

Here are her date ideas:

  • Take a stroll hand-in-hand. Put those phones away and have a meaningful conversation with one another on a beach, in a park or anywhere else out in nature.

  • Host an at-home cooking competition. Dindinger suggests “Iron Chef,” but you could choose any cooking show you like and try it out at home.

  • Go dancing. Even if you both have two left feet, Dindinger says grooving together is a great way to connect. “Dancing gets you laughing, playing and touching,” she tells TODAY.com. “It’s one of the fastest ways to fall in love.”

  • Go on a role-play date. Dress up as a character, give yourself a new name, make up your background, and re-meet each other for a fun date. “Try to stay in character for as long as possible, but what’s most important is to listen, share and be present,” Dindinger says.

Amber Lee, CEO and co-founder of Select Date Society, says dating is key to maintain chemistry overtime. “I’ve seen couples hit a difficult time in their relationship who have been able to get back to a great place simply by making it a priority to date each other like they did when they first met,” she tells TODAY.com.

Here are some of her top date ideas:

  • Host a taste test at home. Blindfold your partner and taste a few different wines, liquors or any type of beverage you like, then compare your favorites.

  • Go on a hike or bike ride. Exercise will release endorphins, and who better to feel good with than someone you love?

  • Book an overnight stay in your own city. Reserve a hotel room and go out to a nice dinner or order room service. You’ll feel miles away from the day-to-day routine at home even though you might be just around the corner.

“No matter how many years you have been with your partner, keeping the spark alive is both hard work and essential,” Laura Doyle, author and relationship coach, tells TODAY.com. Doyle recommends that a weekly date helps couples stay connected by creating "a deeper bond and more intimacy.”

Here are her date suggestions:

  • Visit an animal shelter. Shower each other and some adorable fur babies with affection.

  • Explore your town or city like a tourist. Hop on the train or get in the car and explore your neighborhood. Bonus points if you get lost — sometimes, it’s more fun that way.

  • Recreate your first date with a twist. Enjoy a trip down memory lane, but add some wackiness by heading to the thrift store and picking out each other’s outfits and accessories.

“Couples who have regular date nights appreciate each other more, allowing them to have fun and laugh together,” Sam Whittaker, Relationship and Style Editor at Mantelligence, tells TODAY.com. “Going on dates helps couples remember good memories at the start of the relationship.”

His top date idea:

  • Play the date version of rock-paper-scissors. Whoever wins each round gets to choose what activity to do next for a total of three in the same day.

City break (Petri Oeschger / Getty Images stock)
City break (Petri Oeschger / Getty Images stock)

“The person you’ve been with for two, five or 10 years isn’t the same person they were a year ago,” Dr. John Delony, author, mental health expert and host of The Dr. John Delony Show, tells TODAY.com. “People are growing and evolving all the time, and that means my wife basically gets a new version of me as we get older, and vice versa.”

Here are two of his date suggestions:

  • Go on a scavenger hunt in the neighborhood. 

  • Dress up like superfans and go to the game. 

Hilary Silver, therapist and CEO of Ready for Love, recommends active dates, especially if one partner excels at that particular activity. “It helps the other partner remember and tap back into the enamored feeling they have about seeing someone they love being in their zone of genius,” she says.

Here are her suggestions:

  • Teach each other something new. Pick an activity where one of you excels and have fun sharing your skills.

  • Take dance lessons. Choose a genre where you’re both learning it at the same time

  • Go ziplining. Pick something fun and outside of your comfort zones.

  • Enjoy a Groupon or Airbnb experience. Local businesses offer tons of fun activities, everything from food tours to whitewater rafting excursions.

Couple dancing together in nightclub (Sven Hagolani / Getty Images/fStop)
Couple dancing together in nightclub (Sven Hagolani / Getty Images/fStop)

“Dating is important because it allows the couple time to focus on each other without distractions and they help to build intimacy,” says Jessica Alderson, co-founder and relationship expert at So Syncd. “It’s important for both people in a relationship to feel desired, understood and heard.”

Here are her suggestions:

  • Go on an alphabet date. For example, start out with "A" for aquarium and plan a date. Each week is a new letter and thus, a new corresponding date.

  • Try an escape room. It’s a fun and exciting challenge that encourages collaboration.

  • Take a personality test. Ask each other the questions, perhaps over the course of a romantic dinner for two, and try to guess each other’s answers. You might think you know your partner well, but discussing your personalities with each other can deepen your connection.

“It’s easy for established couples to fall into routines and forget to carve out time for one another, so it’s particularly important to have dates,” says Taly Matiteyahu, founder of Blink Date. “What the couple does during that time doesn’t matter nearly as much as the fact that they’re doing something together.”

Here are her suggestions:

  • Shop for each other. Head to a big-box retailer with a budget and a timer. Find a few small gifts for each other and spend the rest of the day enjoying them.

  • Get crafty. If paint-and-sip nights aren’t your thing, pick a different craft. You’ll both leave the date with a souvenir!

Two women making ceramics at ceramic workshop (Su Arslanoglu / Getty Images stock)
Two women making ceramics at ceramic workshop (Su Arslanoglu / Getty Images stock)

One thing's for sure: The experts agree that dates are always a good idea. Want even more cheap date ideas? We've got you covered.

  • Volunteer. Giving back to the community feels good.

  • Run or walk a charity 5K. Stretch your legs for a good cause.

  • Explore a bookstore or library. Remind each other of the authors you love and read a passage or two from your favorite books.

  • Plant a garden. Enjoy the fruits (or vegetables or flowers) of your labor and love.

  • Host a dance party. Make a playlist of your favorites or pick a tunes from different era — bonus points for appropriate attire — and boogie down.

  • Book a day spa appointment. Enjoy a self-care ritual like a couple’s massage together.

  • Hit up a farmer’s market. Gather other fresh ingredients and go home to make a meal together.

  • Take a tour of a local winery or brewery. Relax, sip and enjoy each other’s company.

  • Go on an ice cream or dessert crawl. We won’t tell if you skip dinner.

  • Play chess in the park. Or bring along a board game of your choice.

  • Sing a fun duet at karaoke. Who cares if you can’t hold a tune?

  • Make sushi at home. You can purchase kits with all the ingredients and instructions.

  • Go on a weekend getaway. Adventure can be found close to home. Book a short staycation in a nearby town you have yet to explore.

  • Go to an independent movie theatre. Rewatch a classic movie on the big screen.

  • Rent a canoe or a kayak. Calm waters are fine, but hit the rapids if you’re up for it.

  • Check out the stars. Grab a blanket and stare up in wonder.

  • Chat at a cafe. Don’t take your coffee or tea to go this time — just sit and talk.

  • Visit a favorite spot from when you were kids. Even if it means just sitting on a park swing.

  • Browse a record store. Discover new music or find some oldies but goodies to enjoy together.

  • Go ice skating or roller skating. No Olympics-level skills required.

  • Take a pottery class. Channel "Ghost" and sculpt your own keepsake.

  • Try your hand at archery. Learn to shoot an arrow just like Cupid.

  • Visit an arcade and play a two-person game. Air hockey or foosball, anyone?

  • Enjoy an outdoor concert. Hit up a food truck before or after for a casual meal al fresco.

  • Go out for pizza. Delivery is cool, but so is sitting down and enjoying a slice. Try a new topping while you’re at it!

  • Play 1-on-1 basketball. Head to the court and shoot some hoops.

  • Do yoga or meditate. Keep the calm and balance in your relationship going.

  • Snag a spot on the beach. Summertime is best, but the beach is awesome even if you have to bundle up to enjoy it.

  • Build a snowman or snow fort. Release your inner children and play in the snow.

  • Play a round of mini golf. Get out on the green with your partner for a tee-rific date night.

  • Visit an amusement park. Have a fun day together, whether you’re there for the rollercoasters or cotton candy.

  • Go to a state fair. Hold hands as you walk the midway together.

  • Explore an art gallery. Discover a new type of art together.

  • Binge watch your favorite sitcom. The couple that laughs together stays together.

  • Watch the sunrise or sunset. If your partner makes a comment on its beauty, don’t ignore it. “Your partner is not just commenting on the sun but requesting a response, a sign of interest or support, hoping for connection in a shared experience,” Dr. Daryl Appleton, a licensed psychotherapist and Fortune 500 executive coach, tells TODAY.com.

This article was originally published on TODAY.com

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