Napoleon is the horny and funny biopic you never expected
If you've dismissed Napoleon as not for you after watching the trailers, we wouldn't blame you as they're setting up a much more formulaic movie than Ridley Scott gives you.
Everything looks very staid and grand like a very traditional historical biopic, especially in the final trailer with various review quotes calling it "epic". Combined with the 158-minute runtime, you might just think that it's just not for you.
But as good as we imagine Ridley Scott could make a traditional Napoleon Bonaparte biopic, that isn't the movie he wanted to give you with Napoleon. If anything, it'd have been more accurate to put the scene where Napoleon whines for some sex with Joséphine in the trailers.
Because Napoleon is both much hornier and much funnier than the trailers have given it credit for.
Ridley Scott's excellent press tour for Napoleon should give you a sense of how he approached this biopic. If you want a historically accurate representation of Napoleon's rise to power and subsequent downfall, you'll need to look elsewhere.
The movie certainly hits the expected milestones including Napoleon's success at the Siege of Toulon, various battle wins such as at Austerlitz and, of course, his ultimate defeat at the Battle of Waterloo. But it's a whistlestop tour through his reign that takes creative liberties in aid of big-screen spectacle.
And Napoleon is frequently spectacular. The Battle of Austerlitz is the high point as Napoleon tricks the Russian and Austrian troops onto ice, before destroying it. It's gorgeously shot from below the ice and the kind of awe-inspiring battle scene that Scott has perfected over the years.
The other set pieces are impressively crafted too, if not as memorable as Austerlitz. It's always the scale and the intricate details of them that astonishes, Scott delivering truly epic (there's that word again) cinematic battles.
But as we mentioned, the movie isn't solely about Napoleon's battle prowess – it's more often interested in his prowess out of uniform, if you get our drift.
The tempestuous relationship between Napoleon and Joséphine is always returned to and more of a focus than his battles. Napoleon is often either trying to have sex with her or engaging in some sort of seductive power struggle and, unlike on the battlefield, Napoleon doesn't always get what he wants.
Even when he's not with Joséphine (or not getting what he wants from her), Napoleon is kind of trying to get his leg over by conquering the world. He's insisting it's for peace in Europe, but Scott makes it obvious that it's a dominance thing and a sign of Napoleon's arrogance.
Joaquin Phoenix's excellent performance turns Napoleon into a whiny man-child, highlighted by one hilarious outburst about the British and their boats. It's clear that Scott looks at Napoleon with disdain; the feeling is there throughout the movie and underlined by a end credits card about the losses in Napoleon's battles.
Vanessa Kirby is Phoenix's equal as Napoleon's wife Joséphine, relishing the control that she had over Napoleon. Kirby doesn't get enough to do and the movie suffers when she's sidelined, but hopefully Scott's planned four-hour cut of the movie will showcase more of Joséphine.
The director's cut should also solve the movie's issue of being overstuffed. It certainly rattles along at a rapid pace and never feels long, but that comes at the expense of developing any particular storyline.
Instead, Napoleon feels precisely crafted to be an entertaining romp that isn't afraid to mock its protagonist. It finds Ridley Scott is at his most playful, from his approach to Napoleon to the use of Pride & Prejudice on the score, with Joaquin Phoenix a perfect collaborator for his vision.
You won't necessarily learn much and it's far from flawless, but you will have a fun time all the same.
Napoleon is out now in cinemas and will be released at a later date on Apple TV+.
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