The Household Tip No One Expected from Jessica Simpson's Memoir

Here's how Open Book entirely changed how I think about running my home.

As a working mom of two (my daughters are taking care of friends' babies here), household management is a tall task.

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Earlier this year I read Jessica Simpson’s new memoir, Open Book, expecting to take a fun little trip down memory lane, back to a time when I effortlessly had abs and before I had kids. It was the early aughts and I regularly watched Nick and Jessica on one of the first reality TV shows, Newlyweds, on MTV. Velour tracksuits and Von Dutch trucker caps were hot, as were the multicolor Louis Vuitton Murakami speedy handbags. It was a simpler time, really. She’d ask things like, “Is this tuna, chicken or fish?” And we’d all shake our heads and think, “Oh, Jessica.”

A few things have changed since then. Jessica and Nick are no longer together, of course. She’s a married mom of three and has grown her fashion empire into a billion dollar business. I’m a mom now, too, and also a business owner. It feels a little like we grew up together.

When I downloaded the audio version of Open Book recently for my morning walks, I’d expected some celebrity gossip and some juicy behind-the-scenes details. (Who didn’t want to know what happened with her marriage and the John Mayer relationship?) What I hadn’t expected was relating to her on many levels… And? I hadn’t expected to walk away with household management advice.

Open Book gave me a golden nugget that transformed how I think about the running of my household. The nugget? Jessica Simpson has a house manager. Jessica Simpson has a male house manager. Jessica Simpson pays this man to manage anything and everything related to household management, including the hiring and coordinating of cleaning services, gardeners, car maintenance and caterers. This kind of staffer may be par for the course for celebrities, but the idea blew my mind.

It's odd to admit, but hearing that this man (who likely makes six figures) has an actual job managing a household, gave me the idea to organize my household management like I do my business. Immediately after reading Simpson's book, I reorganized my home office (which is now my working office, too, since COVID shut down my actual office) with systems I use in my business. This includes scheduled time to manage all financials and incoming and outgoing mail on the 10th and 25th of the month, and allotting “office hours” to manage paperwork (which might also include scheduling dental appointments and such for the kids). It's been a game changer and helps me make the time in my schedule to manage it well. My new approach also helps me make what was previously invisible work, visible. It also sheds light on the fact that it does take hours every week (even in our modest lives) to keep our household running and everyone’s needs met.

Streamlining things isn’t a brand new concept for me. I’m always looking for ways to reduce my mental load, especially at home. This new perspective in household management has helped me feel like I’m managing things better, but why did it take learning about a male household manager for me to rethink this? Did the fact that it was a man earning six figures legitimize the work for me?

I take pride in being a modern, entrepreneurial woman. But if I’m truly being honest with myself, I’ve always felt like the household needed to just manage itself. It doesn’t make me money, so I felt like I shouldn't have to spend time on it. It’s all “women’s work,” so I’d just do it quickly and quietly, so that no one will notice that I’m doing women’s work.

As an entrepreneur and small business owner, I think my thoughts on keeping household work invisible also had to do with feeling like my actual business management held more value. I also thought it diminished my value as a business owner. This is a slippery slope to manage: creating visibility of the work without making it seem like I can’t handle it; like I’m not serious about my business because I’m preoccupied with home and children. I was horrified a couple of years ago when I was invited to a women-in-business event from the local Chamber of Commerce that was titled, “Balancing Work & Life: Using an Instant Pot.” I scoffed. Then I changed all the female references in the email to male and forwarded it to a few male friends who are also business owners. They were incensed. “What is this? Is this a joke?”

The balance of humanity is shifting. I remember the Zoom meeting a couple of years ago in which the two little kids burst in, followed by their crawling mom, who was trying to stay out of view of her husband’s video call. When I saw the video making its rounds online, I laughed so hard, I cried. I was horrified, as was every other professional parent, I’m sure. Now, with many people working from home with no childcare during COVID, this scenario is a regular occurrence for many professionals. We now shrug and move on. We have kids. No big deal.

I like this shift to showing our humanity more regularly in the business place. I think it will only continue and we can all only benefit from acting like real, actual people, rather than the facade of our most professional LinkedIn profile picture. I think Jessica’s situation is striking for a few reasons: the person employed is a full grown man; his title is “House Manager”; and the assumed salary that must go with it. This is a full-blown job. As is managing our household, and your household, and every household. It takes time and effort. It doesn’t have to be invisible. Let’s make it visible.

Shanna Goodman is the mother of two daughters and the owner of a small business. She is the creator of AMP'D, a program which helps put small businesses on the map. With 15 years of business development experience, including five years as a brand strategy agency owner, Shanna provides invaluable insight for her clients. Become an AMP'D Insider for free resources that will help you grow your own business—delivered straight to your inbox.