Gifts for the Lovable Lady Pottymouth in Your Life
We all know one. Some of us may even be one. If you have a lady in your life who swears like a sailor when she shaves her legs (nod to Iris DeMent and John Prine fans) or is known to let curses slip left and right without even realizing it, you can bet she'll appreciate one of the gifts on this list.
Prices and availability are subject to change.
Related: 50 Unique Holiday Gift Ideas for Her Under $50
$18 from Etsy
Is she having a hard time with the boss? Are the teenage spawn mouthing off to her again? She can wear this necklace beneath her shirt (or let it show, if she's feeling like she's fresh out of you-know-whats) and sass back without even saying a word.
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$13 from Etsy
"Sentence enhancers" indeed. This metal keychain is the perfect accessory for the cursing woman who refuses to apologize for her vocabulary.
Related: The Best Gifts for Women Who Have Everything
$20 from Tee Public
If she's not amused by people who won't STFU, she'll feel a kinship with this culinary cat, who also wishes everyone would just stop blathering on.
$20 from Amazon
Author Melissa Mohr wrote this book that takes a historical look at how we sometimes express ourselves. It's been called an "ear-boggling tour of verbal depravity" and "fascinating and illuminating" by critics.
Related: Fun and Hilarious Gag Gifts for the Prankster in Your Life
$15 and up from Etsy
This simple yet effective statement piece from Etsy seller Cynical Redhead comes in brass or aluminum and can be gifted to any confident woman aware of her own worth.
$45 from Etsy
Because sometimes you want a side of seasonality with your F-bombs. Or maybe it's because decorative gourds are a little absurd? Either way, if she has a sense of humor, she'll appreciate this framed cross-stitch print.
Related: Best Friend Gifts Perfect For Your Sister From Another Mister
$7 from Amazon
It's a classy font. In classy and clean black and white. Only the words are dirty. It's perfection.
$20 from Tee Public
This T-shirt is funny no matter if you know the character on it or not (for the record, it's The Swedish Chef from "The Muppet Show"). It's available in five styles, more than two dozen colors, and sizes up to 5XL.
$15 from Etsy
Profane women are often passionate and fiercely love their families and friends. Let them proclaim that passion and ferocity with a tea towel — because irony is almost as dear to them as swear words.
Related: Gifts for Sisters That Express a Lifetime of Love (and Then Some)
$10 from Etsy
What could be better than notebooks emblazoned with cuss words? Neon notebooks emblazoned with cuss words, thank you very (redacted) much.
$24 and up from Etsy
If the woman in question is a mom with younger kids, she might not appreciate some of the other gifts on this list that quite literally spell out curse words. But she'll probably love the secret sass behind these morse code-inspired bracelets that offer a few choices on pottymouth pithiness.
$15 and up from Etsy
Looking for the perfect gift for the dirty-mouthed woman who also isn't a morning person? Here you go.
Related: Fun Family Games to Keep You Entertained at Home
$25 from Uncommon Goods
Just because her vocabulary is littered with dirty words doesn't mean she can't also be literary. If that sounds like someone you know, this game takes a "laugh-till-you-cry look at the Bard's smutty side" and promises "raunchy hilarity."
$45 from Uncommon Goods
Make it profane without using a single curse word? Yep, this recycled steel paperweight from Utah artist Fred Conlon does just that.
$13 from Amazon
She knows she's not, which is what makes this pair of flower-adorned socks so ironically funny. Made of soft combed cotton and nylon, these are actually incredibly comfy, and Blue Q gives 1% of each sale to Doctors Without Borders/Medecins Sans Frontieres.
$15 from Amazon
Designed by multimedia Tennessee artist Wayne White, this 500-piece jigsaw puzzle is a colorful take on a euphemism for daily life.
Related: Gifts for People Who Love Jigsaw Puzzles
$7 from Amazon
Both coloring book and affirmation of her awesomeness, your pottymouth will likely adore this gift meant to buck up any skewed sense of her bad-*ssness on off days.
$17 from Chronicle Books
Just because she drops an F-bomb (or two, or 20) every day doesn't mean she doesn't also like fancy things. With its scripted font and metallic accents, you can appeal to her lower and higher minds in one gift.
$7 from Amazon
Directly contradicting the concept that swearing is a sign of "a stunted vocabulary or a limited intellect," author Emma Byrne takes a scientific look in this book at how profanity can actually have "surprising benefits."
Related: Cool and Creative Gifts Under $10 for Your Coworkers
$35 from Always Fits
We don't know who originated the pejorative "douche canoe," but we'd like to applaud them. And we can get behind any product that combines snark with images of cute animals.
$15 from Always Fits
We have a firm appreciation for the boss b*itch statements that this product endorses, which include "that's gonna be a hard no" and "you should see my active b*itch face."
$18 from Always Fits
Yes, again with the profanity and cute animals. Seriously, it gets us every time. Also, this cup is fancy — because it's made of porcelain — but also functional because it's microwave- and dishwasher-safe.
$21 and up from Etsy
If she's a proud feminist who's all about taking pejoratives and embracing them as positive labels, we're pretty sure she's gonna love this set of stamped rings that come in sterling silver and 14-karat gold.
$16 and up from Look Human
If her salty vocabulary is complemented by a feisty nature, we're pretty sure she'll get a kick out of this tee, which comes in a few different styles in gray and black.
