You've Been Brewing Your Coffee All Wrong

You've Been Brewing Your Coffee All Wrong
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I wouldn't describe myself as a total monster in the mornings. Other people might, but I wouldn't. Sure, if you were to ask my old girlfriends, roommates or family members, they might say that the worst things they've ever heard come out of another person's mouth probably came out of mine during the first 15 minutes after I'd gotten up on any given day. Yes, I have made people cry. I'm not proud of it, but I do cut myself some slack. Before my first cup of coffee, the fugue state in which I find myself every morning is a place of temporary insanity. I often don't remember the things I've said or done, and am regularly confused when I finally come around to find my loved ones teary and mad at some hateful thing that tumbled out of my unconscious mind. If they could only understand: before my coffee, I'm a fragile, skinless man whose only defense against the world is my baneful hostility. My goal every day, therefore, is to find a steaming cup of Joe as quickly as possible for fear I'll say something I can't take back.

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In an attempt to bypass that problem, I used to set a timer on my overpriced digital drip coffee pot, ensuring that there'd be high-octane go-juice waiting for me first thing in the morning. It was an effective strategy in one sense — I definitely got the requisite shot of caffeine to knock me into civility, and quickly — but the delivery method left a lot to be desired. I have yet to encounter a drip coffee maker that doesn't scorch the hell out of the first few dribbles, thereby tainting the whole pot with a bitter burned taste.

Since giving up the drip, I've made it my mission to find the methodologies, equipment, and beans to effectively brew the best cup of rocket fuel around. I've discovered that, although the coffee satisfies my biochemical needs, the process of making the coffee is itself equally important to getting my head right. It's a Zen-like ritual I've found, and it has saved me (and my loved ones) from myself. While I've definitely gotten a lot better in the a.m. hours, God help you if you wake me up with an early phone call. There are probably a few telemarketers out there who will never be okay again.

Check out the slideshow above to learn if you're brewing coffee all wrong.

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