'Everybody I serve, there’s a little bit of me': Tammy Joslyn is NH Women of Year honoree

PORTSMOUTH — Anyone who requires help from Operation Blessing is instructed to leave any shame they carry at the door.

The reason? It’s a feeling Tammy Joslyn remembers all too well from her past hardships.

“Everybody I serve, there’s a little bit of me in them,” she says.

Today, Josyln, 63, is a highly respected figure in the New Hampshire social services realm, a person deeply trusted by those in need, those in leadership roles and many people in between. But life before that was a different story.

The Operation Blessing executive director and Portsmouth Housing Authority resident services coordinator was born in Portsmouth, lived in Eliot, Maine, and attended Marshwood schools. She grew up in a household suffering from addiction, and she experienced rejection and abandonment.

At 14 years old, her mother kicked her out of their house, and Joslyn went to live with her aunt in Newmarket. A boyfriend at the time gave her a Ford Torino, which Joslyn then lived out of for two years around the Seacoast and southern Maine.

She would never tell anybody she lived in her vehicle. As a teenager, Joslyn experimented with drugs, including cocaine, and began to drink. Her drinking continued into her days as a young wife and mother of three children while moving from coast to coast with her husband serving in the U.S. Navy.

At one point, after struggling with her mental health, Joslyn said she attempted suicide.

“I feel like if the right people at the right time in my life hadn’t been there, seriously I don’t know where I’d be today,” she said. “It’s kind of scary to think about because I was so self-destructing. (There was) so much self hatred. I didn’t even know how bad it was until I tried taking my life.”

Joslyn credits her turnaround in part to a maternal figure, Atella Chase, an Eliot woman who owned Riverwatch Clam Hut on Badger’s Island in Kittery and used to sell real estate with Joslyn’s grandmother. Chase hired Joslyn to work at the restaurant and became so close with her that Joslyn ended up living with Chase’s daughter and her husband in Greenland for a time.

“She saw something, and she knew, right? Out of the neediness of that kid, that little girl, looking for safety, looking for whatever … she ended up hiring me. She would pick me up and take me to work. It was awesome. We built a relationship,” Joslyn said of Chase.

“She stayed in my life right up until she passed away. She was 96 years old,” Joslyn added. “Every time I saw her, she greeted me the same way, with that love, that smile, that acceptance. It was very unconditional.”

The Operation Blessing leader points to the faith in God she discovered in 1987, her husband, Tim, their three children, and a pastor and his wife in her church as other key reasons for her rebirth. Joslyn has been sober since her late 20s, now has 10 grandchildren, has been married almost 44 years and has been a member of Connect Community Church almost as long.

Joslyn had been attending church for about a year when her drinking subsided and ultimately ended.

Women of the Year: USA TODAY's Women of the Year project honors local and national heroines who make a positive impact in their communities

“Everything started to look a whole lot brighter. There’s so many stories to tell. It was one miracle after another,” she said. “Nobody could explain it. They weren’t a bunch of coincidences. They really were these God encounters, and it’s been that way ever since. Every day, I see God’s hand in my life and around me in the things he does. That’s why I try not to worry because He knows already. I just try to be the servant He’s calling me to be.”

A former Operation Blessing client, Joslyn was named the community recovery and assistance organization’s executive director in April 2017. Operation Blessing oversees Seacoast Adopt-A-Block, a community outreach program, the Greenleaf Recreation Center and a warming center at its Lafayette Road headquarters. The agency additionally annually holds free Thanksgiving food basket and Christmas gift giveaways, and offers youth and adult programs and courses.

In 2023, across all programming and events, Joslyn estimates that Operation Blessing served more than 6,000 people with the help of 750-plus volunteers. Though the nonprofit serves clients within a 50-mile radius from its Portsmouth location, last year its reach extended as far north as Berlin, New Hampshire, and as far south as Lawrence, Massachusetts.

Children served by Operation Blessing light up at the mere mention of her name, and adults, no matter if they’re served by Operation Blessing or witnesses to her work, sing her praises at every turn.

For her never-ending efforts to tend to people in need, Joslyn has been chosen as the New Hampshire honoree for USA TODAY’s Women of the Year.

“It’s a real honor to do all that I do,” Joslyn said. “It’s not a job to me.”

The following conversation has been edited for length and clarity.

Who paved the way for you?

Definitely my faith has paved the way for me, there’s no doubt about it. Obviously there are people that are a part of that, but it’s my faith in Jesus (first and foremost).

What is your proudest moment, and do you have a lowest?

I think my proudest would be (starting) my family, my husband and my kids. I do take pride in that. I’ve got the scars to prove it.

Husband of 43 years. We were rough (in the beginning). Talk about baggage. We’re still navigating some of it because we have time now. You get married and have kids and you don’t deal with baggage. It comes out. But Tim, he’s an amazing man. I don’t even think he realizes what an amazing man he is.

What is your definition of courage?

For me, it was admitting my faith in Christ. A lot of people won’t talk about it. It’s just (about) getting up, facing the day and going for it — not hiding, not isolating. I did that. I spent so many years not (being) courageous that I didn’t even realize that I was so weak.

You’ve just got to get up and get going every day. There are so many people, especially now, (that are) still living in fear and isolation. I think I spend most of my week just helping people not isolate, to not worry about housing and dealing with their depression.

Is there a guiding principle or mantra that you tell yourself?

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."

I’ve learned to trust more since my faith has grown. Like, I’ll say, ‘Oh my gosh, we’re going to run out of presents (for the Great Christmas Giveaway),’ and then I’ll pray. And then I laugh because God already knows everybody we’re going to help. He already knows the situation and says, ‘Tammy, get over yourself.’ Every year, we have more than we need, and we take care of everybody. That’s in every situation. I’ve watched financially what God has done for Operation Blessing that nobody can do (themselves) or take credit for. It’s nuts.

Who do you look up to?

I’m going to say Ruth Griffin right now. I’m going to be honest with you: I wish I had met her a long time ago, because there’s something really, really special, even with that hard exterior, in that woman. We’ve probably got more in common than I probably know. I wish I knew her (earlier) so I could have heard more about her younger days. But the little bit that I’ve got is special.

That woman is a woman of integrity. She’s just one right now that I wish I could have met sooner. Even at my age, I love ‘going to see ma.’ The encouragement that I feel from her and that love, it’s so sincere and unconditional. And she loves these people. She used to come to all of our classes and address every class.

Editor's note: Griffin spent decades in public service as a state representative, senator, executive councilor and on many local boards. She served for 18 years as the chair of the Portsmouth Housing Authority board.

How do you overcome adversity?

I pray a lot and trust in the Lord for the outcome. Sometimes things will come up against you. I try to stay peaceful. I pray a lot and call it meditation. I get myself where it’s quiet and I have to remember that the situation is probably deeper. I call it ‘getting back to the roots.’ Usually what’s happening is not usually what’s going on. I’ve got to remember that in that moment, if I’m overtired… I’ll react to it wrong. I really make sure that I’m heavily rested and prayed up in life to make sure that I don’t respond to it wrong.

What advice would you give to your younger self?

Oh my gosh. I know this is cliché, but everything I know now, I wish I knew then. But if I was going to give advice to my younger self, (I’d say), ‘Trust the process. Don’t be so hard on myself. I’m a good person.’ There’s a lot but I would probably start with that. Liking myself would be good. It took a lot of years for me to like myself.

This article originally appeared on Portsmouth Herald: Tammy Joslyn of Operation Blessing is NH Women of the Year honoree