DeSantis is making Florida schools great again, one ban and muzzle at a time | Opinion

Ron DeSantis is Making Florida Great Again, taking us back to the good ol’ days, when boys were boys and girls were girls. True men buried their feelings. Unhappy women drank a lot of wine and put on a happy face.

When gay people did straight Christians a favor and stayed out of public life. And patriotic, manly men competed in drag races in cars, not in wigs on “RuPaul’s Drag Race.” After all, America’s demise isn’t happening at the hands of China, but through the manicured nails of drag queens tainting children one drag brunch at a time. Moms, don’t be fooled by the bottomless mimosas.

Blame it on Disney and teachers, who are in the profession for the summers off and to indoctrinate kids. But there’s the, ahem, “right” way to indoctrinate them, and the “woke” way.

Florida is all about the parents’ right to tell schools, “If my kid shouldn’t read a book, no one’s kid should.” As classes begin in Miami-Dade County Public Schools on Thursday, teachers better keep all the new rules straight, or else.

Can’t forget College Board, which insists that schools using its Advanced Placement Psychology course include lessons on sexual orientation and gender identity. Florida first told the Board, “We don’t say gay,” but now it’s apparently OK to say gay in those courses.

Everyone got confused — like your cousin. She’s not a lesbian. She just hasn’t met the right guy.

More than 30,000 Florida high-school students who signed up for AP Psych worried they wouldn’t get college credits. And they would’ve been better off. College campuses are Marxist camps, anyway. Better education is available in the real world — hands on — like the vocational training enslaved people received on Southern plantations.

And, by the way, who said sexual orientation belongs in psychology? Like grandma used to say, gay is just a phase. Or the work of the devil. You’re better off going to an exorcist, or conversion therapy.

It is time we eradicate for good leftist buzzwords like counseling, mental health or teen suicide. Talking about feelings is the dangerous first step toward “woke.” Most people don’t know what that means, but Ron DeSantis said it’s destroying America. Woke then must as dangerous as the Black Little Mermaid or the feminist Barbie.

Next, teens will grow up to be Democrats and vegans — and drink Bud Light.

Moms for Liberty has been doing God’s work of taunting school board members across the country and banning books. Who cares if their child actually read books when they are not forced? We have to confront the obscenities devious librarians have slipped into school materials. Take the explicit content on mating sea horses sussed out in a school book in Tennessee:

“They twist their tails together and twirl gently around, changing color until they match. . . . The two of them dance until sunset and” —Get ready to clutch your pearls! — “then she puts her eggs into his pouch.”

We won’t let sea horses teach our kids about sex in Florida. No, they’ll learn it the old-fashioned way, on PornHub.com.

Schools are not the place to learn how one’s private parts work. School is where teachers can finally set the record straight that slavery was “no big deal” in Christopher Columbus’ time — courtesy of PragerU Kids videos now approved for classroom use. The next logical step should be to replace teachers with videos by Tucker Carlson. He’s looking for a full-time job, anyway.

And Moms for Liberty wrote on X — that’s what we call Twitter these days — that mental health “has NO place in public schools.”

#ParentalRights.

Their tweet got a whopping 545 likes, so they must be right.

The state requirement that schools provide counseling is nothing but a hidden agenda to make students self-aware, empathetic and resilient — you know, the basic tenets of “Social-Emotional Learning.” I’ll call it SEL because acronyms sound scarier.

SEL is the slippery slope that will lead children to CRT, ESG, DEI — AOC and CNN.

Let’s make Florida even greater by banning all acronyms from education — ASAP, OK?

Click here to send the letter.

Isadora Rangel is a member of the Miami Herald Editorial Board.