Billie Eilish: I Wouldn’t ‘Exist’ If I Was Body-Shamed as a Young Girl
Billie Eilish would be happier than ever if haters stopped making negative comments about her body.
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“It’s tough, man,” Eilish, 21, told Vogue in an interview published on published Tuesday, June 20. “Honestly, nobody can say anything about my body that I don’t have a stronger opinion about. … I also think that if I was younger — like if the internet talked about me the way they do now when I was like 11, I don’t think I would be able to exist, to be honest.”
While the “Bad Guy” singer noted that she likes herself “more than I used to,” the body-shaming commentary still gets under her skin. “I’m more interested in how I feel than how [trolls] feel. But then also that might be a load of bulls—t because it still hurts my feelings like a sonabitch,” she confessed.
Eilish explained that she spent most of her life being “very masculine and boyish” but recently realized she’s “allowed to be whatever I want to be when I want to be it.”
“I’m also feminine, and I’m also sexy, and I’m also cute, and I’m also just, like, none of the above, and I’m just me,” she shared, adding that she experiments with different styles so she can express all facets of her personality.
The “Happier Than Ever” artist is no stranger to shutting down haters. After debuting a new glamourous look in 2021, she opened up about the scrutiny she received over the clothes she chooses to wear and the double standards she’s held to.
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“People hold on to these memories and have an attachment [to my past looks],” Eilish told Elle in October 2021. “But it’s very dehumanizing. I lost 100,000 followers just because of the boobs. People are scared of big boobs.”
Eilish added that she was initially blindsided by the “relentless drumbeat of criticism” — something she wasn’t expecting just because she “made a song once and then kept making songs.”
“I never said, ‘Hey, pay attention to my life,’” she told the outlet at the time. “All my friends know I don’t wanna see any of [the negative chatter]. When people send me something mean, it hurts my soul.”
In May, discourse erupted when Eilish posted a photo via Instagram of herself rocking a tight-cropped T-shirt that showed off her pierced belly button and the top of the dragon tattoo on her hip. “I thought she was going to be different and not fall in line with the rest of these people,” one troll wrote in the comments section, while another replied: “Whatever happened to ‘I don’t want to be sexualized.’”
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The Grammy winner, for her part, was quick to fire back.
“I spent the first five years of my career getting absolutely OBLITERATED by you fools for being boy-ish and dressing how I did & constantly being told I’d be hotter if I acted like a woman,” she wrote via her Instagram Story. “And now, when I feel comfortable enough to wear anything remotely feminine or fitting, I CHANGED and am a sellout … and ‘what happened to her’ oMg iT’s nOt thE sAmE biLlie she’s just like the rest, blah blah … you guys are true idiots. I can be BOTH you f–king bozos LET WOMEN EXIST! :)))”
The California native continued: “FUN FACT! did you know that women are multifaceted!!!!!??? Shocking right?? believe it or not women can be interested in multiple things. … Also that femininity does not equal weakness???!!!!! omg?! insane right? who knew?? … and also totally unheard of and insane to want to express yourself differently at different times .”
The commentary on Eilish’s sexier looks isn’t always negative. When she shared a snap of her soaking up the sun in a yellow bikini earlier this month, fans went wild over her patterned swimsuit and toned physique. “Omfg. I am not breathing rn,” one person gushed, while another commented: “Sorry that all us Billie fans r intruding your comments section. We r currently dying.”
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Despite still having to face scrutiny from the public, Eilish now has coping mechanisms she turns to in order to keep her calm — and to give her a break from constantly being in the spotlight.
“I like to take baths,” she told Vogue on Tuesday. “Honestly, I play a lot of games on my phone, and it makes me feel really good. But it’s really hard, you know? I’ve had a rough time, TBH, and I’m still figuring it out. But it’s definitely a weird life; I’ll say that.”
