Boston park bans ‘Philadelphia-themed products’ before Super Bowl

If you thought Philadelphia was a tough place for opposing fans, try bringing a tub of Crisco into Boston.

Ahead of the Super Bowl, Boston issued ban on “Philadelphia-themed products” at the Esplanade, a popular park that follows the Charles River from the Museum of Science to the Boston University Bridge.

The hilarious ban outlaws Philadelphia sports apparel, actual bald eagles, cheesesteak sandwiches, cracked copper bells, soft pretzels, Philadelphia brand cream cheese, anything in the shade midnight green, mummers, Will Smith and Sylvester Stallone, and Crisco, one of the breakout stars of the NFL playoffs.

"We realized that appearing in a Super Bowl for only the third time — and first time since losing to the Patriots in 2005 — was disorienting for Philadelphia fans and that clarity on acceptable items to bring in our park should be offered," said Michael Nichols, executive director of the Esplanade Association, via WCVB5.

According to the station, the ban will be in effect until the "Duck Boats return to Boston’s streets after Super Bowl LII."

It seems like the entire nation outside of New England is rooting for the Eagles to knock off the Evil Empire. But the entire world is also piling on those wild animals affectionately known as Philadelphia sports fans, who were named the nation’s most hated in a 2015 Sports Illustrated poll.

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Philadelphia Eagles fans celebrate Super Bowl berth
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Philadelphia Eagles fans celebrate Super Bowl berth
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: Fans cheer as the Philadelphia Eagles play in the NFC Championship game against the Minnesota Vikings during the second half at Lincoln Financial Field on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: Philadelphia Eagles fans celebrate running and marching on North Broad Street downtown near City Hall on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Supporters celebrated in the streets the 38-7 win over the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game. (Photo by Corey Perrine/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21:Brandon Brooks #79, Lane Johnson #65 and Mack Hollins #10 of the Philadelphia Eagles celebrate with the fans after a fourth quarter touchdown against the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game at Lincoln Financial Field on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Mitchell Leff/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: Philadelphia Eagles fans celebrate the teams win over the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game at Lincoln Financial Field on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The Philadelphia Eagles defeated the Minnesota Vikings 38-7. (Photo by Mitchell Leff/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 13: Philadelphia Eagles fan holds a sign during the NFC Divisional Playoff game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Atlanta Falcons on January 13, 2017 at Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia, PA. Eagles won 15-10.(Photo by Andy Lewis/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: Gurvinder Singh of Middlesex County, New Jersey, waves an Eagles flag while stopped in traffic on North Broad Street with droves of Philadelphia Eagles fans downtown near City Hall on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Supporters celebrated in the streets the 38-7 win over the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game. (Photo by Corey Perrine/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: A Philadelphia Eagles fan cheers on their team in the NFC Championship game against the Philadelphia Eagles at Lincoln Financial Field on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Mitchell Leff/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21: A Philadelphia Eagles fan runs on top of a car celebrating North Broad Street with droves of others downtown near City Hall on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Supporters celebrated in the streets the 38-7 win over the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game. (Photo by Corey Perrine/Getty Images)
PHILADELPHIA, PA - JANUARY 21:Philadelphia Eagles fans celebrate during the second quarter against the Minnesota Vikings in the NFC Championship game at Lincoln Financial Field on January 21, 2018 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Mitchell Leff/Getty Images)
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Philly fans may be getting a bad rap because of a drunken, stupid few, combined with the colorfulness of their crimes.

But the same fans that have been trying to escape a perception stained by someone throwing a few snowballs at Santa Claus many years ago are keeping the myths alive in modern times. Philly fans are now burdened by members of their group getting caught punching police horses (twice), sliding down Crisco-covered lamp posts and running blindly into subway columns.

Say what you want about those terrible Eagles fans, but they haven’t stopped serving New England clam chowder in Philly.

They'll just dump it in your lap.

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