Now that most of the world is stuck at home under further notice, parents everywhere are trying to figure out how to keep their kids out of sight and out of mind while they work.
Barrister Bridget Dolan QC is one of those parents. On March 24, she took to Twitter to share the “essential document” she hung up in her house, which warns her kids against disturbing her while she’s working.
Day 2 of isolation. Kids coping better than me. Very happy to email anyone who wants it a copy of the essential document I needed to draft this am pic.twitter.com/QptM2ouj6r
— Bridget Dolan QC (@DrBridgetDolan) March 24, 2020
“The thing you think you can see inside this room is not your mother,” the hilarious notice begins. “It is a barrister being stressed out by having to conduct conferences with solicitors and telephone hearings with judges from home whilst also juggling paperwork and responding to a tsunami of emails.”
In the note, Dolan writes that when she is in barrister mode, she can “perform no parental functions of any time.” However, in a footnote, she says that “medical emergenc[ies]” — “defined as extreme pain or any episode of bleeding for more than 3 minutes” — are exceptions. She also warns that “hunger is not a medical emergency.”
“Whenever this notice is removed, normal maternal services will be resumed,” she says.
In the comments, fellow parents are lauding Dolan for her hilarious note.
“Fantastic. If only my kid could read,” one user wrote.
“I’m making one of these for the cat,” another person joked.
Children, if you’re reading this: Please just let your parents work in peace.
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