You can now get sushi burritos at Starbucks, if you dare

Starbucks is notorious for jumping on the food trend bandwagon, and it's definitely not stopping at Unicorn Frappuccinos or avocado toast.

The chain, originally famous for coffee (if you can even remember those days), has introduced a new uber-trendy item to their menu, and we don't quite know how to feel about it.

Starbuck's new Sushi Burrito

Starbuck's new Sushi Burrito

Image: starbucks

Meet the Starbucks Sushi Burrito. They're calling it the Chicken Maki Roll, and it's hitting select stores in Chicago and Seattle as part of their new Mercato menu, which focuses on fresh and hearty lunch options.

The roll is, according to Starbucks, "a classic California chicken burrito with a twist." It's stuffed with "slow cooked, shredded chicken, fire roasted tomatillo salsa, lime crema, fresh cucumber and pickled cabbage with onions, avocado and crispy onion." Then it's wrapped in sushi rice and nori.

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Worst things you can do at Starbucks
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Worst things you can do at Starbucks

1. Not saying what size

I get it, you’re at Starbucks because you need your daily fix of caffeine, and if you’re anything like me, you’re like a zombie before you get it. With that being said, though, more people than you would think don’t say what size drink they want — probably about a third of all customers don’t.

Even if you don’t know the Starbucks lingo, you can ask for a “large” and we’ll know what it means, but, please, don’t give us some really complicated order without saying what size so we can actually mark the cup as you say it. It just gets really repetitive having to ask customer after customer what size drink they want while trying to remember their orders.

2. Ordering while on your phone

Also with ordering, please have the courtesy to get off of your phone for two seconds to communicate your order. Not only is it incredibly rude to be on the phone or glued to your text when trying to order, but chances are we won’t be able to understand you and you won’t be paying attention to us if we ask you a question. So please, hang up with mom before getting in line.

3. Dumping coffee into the trash

When we ask you if you want room for cream in your coffee, it is so that there is space in the cup to put milk in if you wish. That’s not such a hard concept, is it? If not, then why do people ask for no room but then go over and dump half a cup of hot coffee into the trash to add milk? Please stop doing this. The trash bags are already disgusting when we get around to changing them, and dumping liquid in them just makes it worse.

4. "I wanted that iced."

We all make mistakes, but if I had a penny for every for every time I heard this one, I could afford all the Starbucks my heart desires. Unless you specify, all of our espresso beverages are made hot. I don’t care if it’s the middle of summer; you need to let us know if you want something iced. We’re happy to remake it for you but it messes up our flow and slows us down, and this could all be avoided by specifying when you order.

This also applies to, “I wanted that with soy,” or, “I didn’t want whip on that.” We are baristas, not psychics.

5. Saying "Frappé"

A “frappé” is a drink at McDonald’s. Starbucks does not have “frappés.” If you order a “frappé” instead of a Frappuccino, you will sound stupid and your barista will judge you, no questions asked.

6. "Is this mine?"

You just ordered a small hot drink one minute ago, so, no, this large iced drink is not yours. I don’t get this. You think that all of these people that have been waiting here longer than you are just standing around for fun? This venti Frappuccino with whipped cream is not your tall hot chai tea latte. We make drinks in order, so your order is not going to be ready right after you pay.

7. Being in a hurry

This one goes along with the last one. We make drinks in order, so we are not going to prioritize yours just because you are in a hurry. It’s extremely rude to ask the barista to make your drink first because you need to make it across campus in 5 minutes. It’s not our fault that you thought that would be enough time to order Starbucks and make it to your meeting.

8. Iced Caramel Macchiato

My last pet peeve is probably the one that bothers me the most. Macchiatos are not supposed to be iced. Macchiato in Italian means “marked,” meaning that your milk is marked with espresso, creating a strong coffee flavor at first that gradually fades into sweet milk. When you order it iced and drink it through a straw, this is already going to be backwards since you are starting at the bottom.

And to make things worse, a piece of me dies every time I watch someone stir their iced caramel macchiato after they get it, combining the layers. Or worse, order it “upside down”. That isn’t a caramel macchiato anymore. It’s an iced latte. If that’s what you want, order that, but why am I wasting my time making a macchiato if you’re just going to mess it up?

It’s clear that nobody actually knows what a caramel macchiato is and that they are just ordering it because it sounds cool, but please don’t. If you want to know what a drink is, ask your barista. We love to share our knowledge.

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According to Business Insider, if the item does well in Chicago and Seattle, we can expect the burrito to make its way to other locations across the country.

The sushi burrito trend started back in 2011, so Starbucks is a little behind the curve and probably a few years too late. Also, which one of Starbucks famous drinks goes with this snack? A Caramel Frapp? A Double Shot?

Honestly, we're just thankful they're not keeping raw fish in that barely refrigerated display case.

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