Taylor Swift opens up about body image, eating disorder

Taylor Swift revealed her struggle with disordered eating in an upcoming Netflix documentary and a new magazine interview.

“Miss Americana,” which premiered at the Sundance Film Festival on Thursday, features a moment where the singer opens up about having her appearance picked apart and the impact of “see[ing] pictures of myself every day,” according to Variety. She said she’d see a photo where she felt her “tummy was too big, or … someone said that I looked pregnant … and that’ll just trigger me to just starve a little bit — just stop eating.”

The documentary also details how Swift’s eating and exercise behavior while touring for her “1989” album impacted her stamina when “Reputation” came out years later.

“I thought that I was supposed to feel like I was going to pass out at the end of a show, or in the middle of it,” she says in the documentary. “Now I realize, no, if you eat food, have energy, get stronger, you can do all these shows and not feel [enervated].” (See the trailer below.)

While the 30-year-old says she’s come to accept she’s “a size 6 instead of a size double-zero,” she also admits she didn’t see an issue when she was a double-zero. If she received criticism that she was too small, she’d reply: “‘What are you talking about? Of course I eat. … I exercise a lot.’ And I did exercise a lot. But I wasn’t eating.”

Swift elaborated in an interview with Variety published Friday.

“I didn’t know if I was going to feel comfortable with talking about body image and talking about the stuff I’ve gone through in terms of how unhealthy that’s been for me — my relationship with food and all that over the years,” she told the publication, before adding that the film’s director, Lana Wilson, helped her make sense of the story and “talk about it in a better way.”

She added that her “relationship with food was exactly the same psychology that I applied to everything else in my life: If I was given a pat on the head, I registered that as good. If I was given a punishment, I registered that as bad.”

But she continued that she “never really wanted to talk about that before” and is “pretty uncomfortable talking about it now.”

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Taylor Swift out and about in 2019
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Taylor Swift out and about in 2019
PARIS, FRANCE - SEPTEMBER 09: (EDITORS NOTE: Image approved by Artist) Taylor Swift performs during the "City of Lover" concert at L'Olympia on September 9, 2019 in Paris, France. (Photo by Dave Hogan/ABA/Getty Images)
PRUDENTIAL CENTER, NEWARK, NEW JERSEY, UNITED STATES - 2019/08/26: Taylor Swift attends the 2019 MTV Video Music Video Awards held at the Prudential Center in Newark, NJ. (Photo by Efren Landaos/SOPA Images/LightRocket via Getty Images)
NEWARK, NEW JERSEY - AUGUST 26: Singer Taylor Swift attends the 2019 MTV Video Music Awards red carpet at Prudential Center on August 26, 2019 in Newark, New Jersey. (Photo by Aaron J. Thornton/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - AUGUST 26: (L-R) Bella Hadid, Taylor Swift, and Gigi Hadid attend as Republic Records celebrates The 2019 VMAs at The Fleur Room at Moxy Chelsea on August 26, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Republic Records)
NEWARK, NEW JERSEY - AUGUST 26: Taylor Swift performs onstage during the 2019 MTV Video Music Awards at Prudential Center on August 26, 2019 in Newark, New Jersey. (Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images for MTV)
BROOKLYN, NEW YORK - AUGUST 23: (L-R) Jeslyn, Eliotte Nicole, Taylor Swift, Melanie Nyema and Kamilah Marshall pose with Spotify Mural on Album Release Day at Kent Avenue and South 1st Street, Williamsburg, on August 23, 2019 in Brooklyn, New York. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Spotify)
GOOD MORNING AMERICA - 8/22/19 Taylor Swift performs live from Central Park on "Good Morning America," Thursday, August 22, 2019, airing on the Walt Disney Television Network. GMA19 (Photo by Paula Lobo/Walt Disney Television) ROBIN ROBERTS, TAYLOR SWIFT
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - AUGUST 22: Taylor Swift visits "Elvis Duran And The Z100 Morning Show" at Z100 Studio on August 22, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for ABA)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - AUGUST 22: Taylor Swift takes a selfie with the cast of "Good Morning America" before performing on ABC's "Good Morning America" at SummerStage at Rumsey Playfield, Central Park on August 22, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for ABA)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - AUGUST 22: Taylor Swift performs on ABC's "Good Morning America" at SummerStage at Rumsey Playfield, Central Park on August 22, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images for ABA)
TEEN CHOICE 2019: Taylor Swift arrives on the blue carpet at TEEN CHOICE 2019 airing Sunday, August 11 (8:00-10:00 PM ET live/PT tape-delayed) on FOX from Hermosa Beach, CA. (Photo by FOX Image Collection via Getty Images)
TEEN CHOICE 2018: Taylor Swift accepts the Icon Award onstage at TEEN CHOICE 2019 airing Sunday, August 11 (8:00-10:00 PM ET live/PT tape-delayed) on FOX from Hermosa Beach, CA. (Photo by FOX Image Collection via Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - JULY 10: Taylor Swift performs onstage as Taylor Swift, Dua Lipa, SZA and Becky G perform at The Prime Day concert, presented by Amazon Music at on July 10, 2019 at Hammerstein Ballroom in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Amazon )
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - JULY 10: Taylor Swift performs onstage as Taylor Swift, Dua Lipa, SZA and Becky G perform at The Prime Day concert, presented by Amazon Music at on July 10, 2019 at Hammerstein Ballroom in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Amazon )
CARSON, CALIFORNIA - JUNE 01: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NO COMMERCIAL USE) Taylor Swift performs onstage at 2019 iHeartRadio Wango Tango presented by The JUVÉDERM® Collection of Dermal Fillers at Dignity Health Sports Park on June 01, 2019 in Carson, California. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for iHeartMedia)
CARSON, CALIFORNIA - JUNE 01: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NO COMMERCIAL USE) Taylor Swift performs onstage at 2019 iHeartRadio Wango Tango presented by The JUVÉDERM® Collection of Dermal Fillers at Dignity Health Sports Park on June 01, 2019 in Carson, California. (Photo by Rich Fury/Getty Images for iHeartMedia)
CARSON, CALIFORNIA - JUNE 01: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NO COMMERCIAL USE) Taylor Swift performs onstage at 2019 iHeartRadio Wango Tango presented by The JUVÉDERM® Collection of Dermal Fillers at Dignity Health Sports Park on June 01, 2019 in Carson, California. (Photo by Rich Fury/Getty Images for iHeartMedia)
Taylor Swift during the filming of the Graham Norton Show at BBC Studioworks 6, Television Centre, Wood Lane, London, to be aired on BBC One on Friday evening. (Photo by Matt Crossick/PA Images via Getty Images)
(left to right) Sophie Turner, Michael Fassbender, Jessica Chastain, James McAvoy and Taylor Swift during the filming of the Graham Norton Show at BBC Studioworks 6, Television Centre, Wood Lane, London, to be aired on BBC One on Friday evening. (Photo by Matt Crossick/PA Images via Getty Images)
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA - MAY 01: Taylor Swift performs during the 2019 Billboard Music Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 1, 2019 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
THE VOICE -- "Live Finale Results" Episode 1616B -- Pictured: Taylor Swift -- (Photo by: Trae Patton/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
BILLBOARD MUSIC AWARDS -- Show Backstage -- 2019 BBMA at the MGM Grand, Las Vegas, Nevada -- Pictured: (l-r) Halsey, Taylor Swift and Jennifer Hudson -- (Photo by: Todd Williamson/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA - MAY 01: Brendon Urie (L) of Panic! at the Disco and Taylor Swift perform during the 2019 Billboard Music Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 1, 2019 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA - MAY 01: 2019 Taylor Swift arrives at the Billboard Music Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 01, 2019 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA - MAY 01: 2019 Taylor Swift arrives at the Billboard Music Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 01, 2019 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)
NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE - APRIL 25: In advance of her new single 'Me!, Taylor Swift surprises fans at the new Kelsey Montague "What Lifts You Up" Mural on April 25, 2019 in Nashville, Tennessee. Swift commissioned the mural and put clues about her upcoming new music in the piece. (Photo by Leah Puttkammer/Getty Images)
NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE - APRIL 25: In advance of her new single 'Me!, Taylor Swift surprises fans at the new Kelsey Montague "What Lifts You Up" Mural on April 25, 2019 in Nashville, Tennessee. Swift commissioned the mural and put clues about her upcoming new music in the piece. (Photo by Leah Puttkammer/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - APRIL 23: Taylor Swift performs during the TIME 100 Gala 2019 Dinner at Jazz at Lincoln Center on April 23, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for TIME)
NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 23: Taylor Swift attends the 2019 Time 100 Gala at Frederick P. Rose Hall, Jazz at Lincoln Center on April 23, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Taylor Hill/FilmMagic)
NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 23: Taylor Swift attends the Times 100 Most Influential People red carpet event on April 23, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Robert Kamau/GC Images)
NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 22: Taylor Swift seen out and about in Manhattan on April 22, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Robert Kamau/GC Images)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 14: Taylor Swift arrives at the 2019 iHeartRadio Music Awards which broadcasted live on FOX at Microsoft Theater on March 14, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Tony Barson/WireImage)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 14: Taylor Swift arrives at the 2019 iHeartRadio Music Awards which broadcasted live on FOX at Microsoft Theater on March 14, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Tony Barson/WireImage)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 14: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NO COMMERCIAL USE) Taylor Swift on stage at the 2019 iHeartRadio Music Awards which broadcasted live on FOX at the Microsoft Theater on March 14, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic for iHeartMedia )
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - MARCH 14: (EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NO COMMERCIAL USE) Maren Morris (L) and Taylor Swift attend the 2019 iHeartRadio Music Awards which broadcasted live on FOX at Microsoft Theater on March 14, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for iHeartMedia)
LONDON, ENGLAND - FEBRUARY 10: Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn seen attending the Vogue BAFTA party at Annabel's club in Mayfair on February 10, 2019 in London, England. (Photo by GOR/GC Images)
BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA - JANUARY 06: Music Artist Taylor Swift attends InStyle And Warner Bros. Golden Globes After Party 2019 at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 06, 2019 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Leon Bennett/FilmMagic)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA - JANUARY 06: Taylor Swift attends the 2019 InStyle and Warner Bros. 76th Annual Golden Globe Awards Post-Party at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 6, 2019 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for InStyle)
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The “Lover” singer says she’s been inspired by the research professor and inspirational speaker Brené Brown to help her “decide whose opinions matter more and whose opinions you put more weight on” and that she’s reached a place where she’s “really happy.”

“I pick and choose now, for the most part, what I care deeply about. And I think that’s made a huge difference,” she says.

“Miss Americana” drops on Netflix on Jan. 31.

Read the full Variety interview here.

If you’re struggling with an eating disorder, call the National Eating Disorder Association hotline at 1-800-931-2237.

  • This article originally appeared on HuffPost.
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