Roseanne recap: Meet the neighbors

This week’s Roseanne finds the title character in fear of her new Muslim neighbors.

The episode makes no ifs, ands or buts about it: Roseanne’s paranoia stems from years of watching Fox News. She’s convinced Lanford’s new residents are part of a secret terrorist sleeper cell and have come to blow up the neighborhood. Jackie assures her she has nothing to worry about, but it’s not until she meets the neighbors that she begins to recognize her own ignorance.

Roseanne and Jackie are forced to confront Samir and Fatima at 2 am, when their wifi goes down minutes before Mary is scheduled to Skype with Gina (The Mindy Project’s Xosha Roquemore). They venture over with a baseball bat and explain their predicament. Fatima suggests the wifi will work better at their house, and offers to let Mary come over and use their computer. Roseanne, however, is hesitant to accept their generous offer. Moments later, Samir and Fatima’s son comes to the door in a bulletproof vest. Fatima explains that some of the neighbors have been yelling some pretty terrible things at them, and their son’s been having nightmares; the vest helps him feel safer. She then offers Roseanne and Jackie their American-as-apple-pie wifi password: GoCubs.

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'Roseanne' revival
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'Roseanne' revival
ROSEANNE - 'Go Cubs' - The Conners can't pay their Wi-Fi bill, so they befriend their new neighbors to use the internet for Mary to Skype with mom Geena, who is stationed in Afghanistan. Meanwhile, Dan loses an important job and D.J. admits post-military life has been hard, so they come up with a plan to make extra money, on the seventh episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 8 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) SARA GILBERT, ROSEANNE BARR, ALAIN WASHNEVSKY, ANNE BEDIAN
ROSEANNE - 'No Country for Old Women' - After Beverly gets kicked out of the nursing home, Roseanne and Jackie fight over who will take care of their mother. Meanwhile, Mark's creative touch with building a birdhouse for Dan's customer is more than Dan can handle, but Darlene defends her son, on the sixth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 1 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Greg Gayne/ABC via Getty Images) ESTELLE PARSONS, LAURIE METCALF
ROSEANNE - 'Eggs Over, Not Easy' - A crucial moment for Becky's surrogacy arrangement forces her and Darlene to critically assess each other's lives. Meanwhile, an animal rescue organization rejects Jackie's application to adopt a puppy; and Roseanne makes a plan to change their mind, on the fourth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 10 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) LAURIE METCALF, LECY GORANSON, SARAH CHALKE
ROSEANNE - 'Netflix & Pill' - After celebrating their 45th anniversary, Roseanne reveals to Dan a bigger problem with her bad knee. Meanwhile, Crystal announces her retirement as a waitress at the casino, and Becky and Darlene compete for the job which has full-time benefits, on the eighth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 15 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN
ROSEANNE - 'Darlene v. David' - David unexpectedly shows up for Harris' birthday after being absent for years, forcing Darlene to re-examine their relationship and the rest of the family. Meanwhile, Bev temporarily moves into the Conner home after an incident at the nursing home prevents her from returning, on the fifth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 17 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Greg Gayne via Getty Images) LECY GORANSON, SARA GILBERT
ROSEANNE - 'Go Cubs' - The Conners can't pay their Wi-Fi bill, so they befriend their new neighbors to use the internet for Mary to Skype with mom Geena, who is stationed in Afghanistan. Meanwhile, Dan loses an important job and D.J. admits post-military life has been hard, so they come up with a plan to make extra money, on the seventh episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 8 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) JOHN GOODMAN, MICHAEL FISHMAN
ROSEANNE - 'Netflix & Pill' - After celebrating their 45th anniversary, Roseanne reveals to Dan a bigger problem with her bad knee. Meanwhile, Crystal announces her retirement as a waitress at the casino, and Becky and Darlene compete for the job which has full-time benefits, on the eighth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 15 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'Go Cubs' - The Conners can't pay their Wi-Fi bill, so they befriend their new neighbors to use the internet for Mary to Skype with mom Geena, who is stationed in Afghanistan. Meanwhile, Dan loses an important job and D.J. admits post-military life has been hard, so they come up with a plan to make extra money, on the seventh episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 8 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JAYDEN REY, SARA GILBERT, LAURIE METCALF
ROSEANNE - ABC's 'Roseanne' stars Ames McNamara as Mark, Sara Gilbert as Darlene Conner, Laurie Metcalf as Jackie Harris, Emma Kenney as Harris Conner, Jayden Rey as Mary, Roseanne Barr as Roseanne Conner, Michael Fishman as D.J. Conner, John Goodman as Dan Conner, Lecy Goranson as Becky Conner, and Sarah Chalke as Andrea. (Robert Trachtenberg/ABC via Getty Images)
ROSEANNE - 'Roseanne Gets the Chair' - Roseanne's clash with Darlene over how she's raising her kids - especially Harris - reaches a breaking point; while Dan tries to help Roseanne with her bad knee by getting her an elevator chair, which she refuses to use because she doesn't want to admit getting old, on the second episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 3 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN
ROSEANNE - 'Roseanne Gets the Chair' - Roseanne's clash with Darlene over how she's raising her kids - especially Harris - reaches a breaking point; while Dan tries to help Roseanne with her bad knee by getting her an elevator chair, which she refuses to use because she doesn't want to admit getting old, on the second episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 3 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN, LAURIE METCALF, EMMA KENNEY, SARA GILBERT
ROSEANNE - 'Roseanne Gets the Chair' - Roseanne's clash with Darlene over how she's raising her kids - especially Harris - reaches a breaking point; while Dan tries to help Roseanne with her bad knee by getting her an elevator chair, which she refuses to use because she doesn't want to admit getting old, on the second episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 3 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) SARA GILBERT, JOHN GOODMAN, LAURIE METCALF, ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'Roseanne Gets the Chair' - Roseanne's clash with Darlene over how she's raising her kids - especially Harris - reaches a breaking point; while Dan tries to help Roseanne with her bad knee by getting her an elevator chair, which she refuses to use because she doesn't want to admit getting old, on the second episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 3 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'Eggs Over, Not Easy' - A crucial moment for Becky's surrogacy arrangement forces her and Darlene to critically assess each other's lives. Meanwhile, an animal rescue organization rejects Jackie's application to adopt a puppy; and Roseanne makes a plan to change their mind, on the fourth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 10 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) LAURIE METCALF
ROSEANNE - 'Eggs Over, Not Easy' - A crucial moment for Becky's surrogacy arrangement forces her and Darlene to critically assess each other's lives. Meanwhile, an animal rescue organization rejects Jackie's application to adopt a puppy; and Roseanne makes a plan to change their mind, on the fourth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 10 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) LECY GORANSON, LAURIE METCALF
ROSEANNE - Iconic comedy series Roseanne returns to The ABC Television Network on Tuesday, March 27, at 8 p.m. EDT, with nine new episodes featuring the complete original cast - Roseanne Barr, John Goodman, Sara Gilbert, Laurie Metcalf, Michael Fishman and Lecy Goranson. Sarah Chalke, who played the character Becky in later seasons, will also appear in another role. New cast joining the one-of-a-kind Conner family includes Emma Kenney as Harris Conner-Healy, Ames McNamara as Mark Conner-Healy and Jayden Rey as Mary Conner. With fresh stories that tackle todays issues and even more laughs from a brilliant cast and crew that havent missed a beat, audiences old and new will celebrate the homecoming of Americas favorite working-class family. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) SARA GILBERT, ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'Eggs Over, Not Easy' - A crucial moment for Becky's surrogacy arrangement forces her and Darlene to critically assess each other's lives. Meanwhile, an animal rescue organization rejects Jackie's application to adopt a puppy; and Roseanne makes a plan to change their mind, on the fourth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 10 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) LECY GORANSON
ROSEANNE - Iconic comedy series Roseanne returns to The ABC Television Network on Tuesday, March 27, at 8 p.m. EDT, with nine new episodes featuring the complete original cast - Roseanne Barr, John Goodman, Sara Gilbert, Laurie Metcalf, Michael Fishman and Lecy Goranson. Sarah Chalke, who played the character Becky in later seasons, will also appear in another role. New cast joining the one-of-a-kind Conner family includes Emma Kenney as Harris Conner-Healy, Ames McNamara as Mark Conner-Healy and Jayden Rey as Mary Conner. With fresh stories that tackle todays issues and even more laughs from a brilliant cast and crew that havent missed a beat, audiences old and new will celebrate the homecoming of Americas favorite working-class family. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN
ROSEANNE - Iconic comedy series Roseanne returns to The ABC Television Network on Tuesday, March 27, at 8 p.m. EDT, with nine new episodes featuring the complete original cast - Roseanne Barr, John Goodman, Sara Gilbert, Laurie Metcalf, Michael Fishman and Lecy Goranson. Sarah Chalke, who played the character Becky in later seasons, will also appear in another role. New cast joining the one-of-a-kind Conner family includes Emma Kenney as Harris Conner-Healy, Ames McNamara as Mark Conner-Healy and Jayden Rey as Mary Conner. With fresh stories that tackle todays issues and even more laughs from a brilliant cast and crew that havent missed a beat, audiences old and new will celebrate the homecoming of Americas favorite working-class family. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN
ROSEANNE - Iconic comedy series Roseanne returns to The ABC Television Network on Tuesday, March 27, at 8 p.m. EDT, with nine new episodes featuring the complete original cast - Roseanne Barr, John Goodman, Sara Gilbert, Laurie Metcalf, Michael Fishman and Lecy Goranson. Sarah Chalke, who played the character Becky in later seasons, will also appear in another role. New cast joining the one-of-a-kind Conner family includes Emma Kenney as Harris Conner-Healy, Ames McNamara as Mark Conner-Healy and Jayden Rey as Mary Conner. With fresh stories that tackle todays issues and even more laughs from a brilliant cast and crew that havent missed a beat, audiences old and new will celebrate the homecoming of Americas favorite working-class family. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) SARA GILBERT, LAURIE METCALF, ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'No Country for Old Women' - After Beverly gets kicked out of the nursing home, Roseanne and Jackie fight over who will take care of their mother. Meanwhile, Mark's creative touch with building a birdhouse for Dan's customer is more than Dan can handle, but Darlene defends her son, on the sixth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 1 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Greg Gayne/ABC via Getty Images) JOHN GOODMAN, LAURIE METCALF, ROSEANNE BARR
ROSEANNE - 'Darlene v. David' - David unexpectedly shows up for Harris' birthday after being absent for years, forcing Darlene to re-examine their relationship and the rest of the family. Meanwhile, Roseanne and Jackie's mother, Bev, temporarily moves into the Conner home after an incident at the nursing home prevents her from returning, on the fifth episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, APRIL 17 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Greg Gayne/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, ESTELLE PARSONS
ROSEANNE - 'Go Cubs' - The Conners can't pay their Wi-Fi bill, so they befriend their new neighbors to use the internet for Mary to Skype with mom Geena, who is stationed in Afghanistan. Meanwhile, Dan loses an important job and D.J. admits post-military life has been hard, so they come up with a plan to make extra money, on the seventh episode of the revival of 'Roseanne,' TUESDAY, MAY 8 (8:00-8:30 p.m. EDT), on The ABC Television Network. (Adam Rose/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR, JOHN GOODMAN
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The next day, Roseanne runs into Fatima at the grocery store checkout line. Fatima hands the cashier her EBT card, but there’s insufficient funds. “Maybe the American tax payers forgot to fill it up,” the checkout girl quips. Roseanne then offers to pay for the rest of Fatima’s groceries, and the checkout girl responds with a bigoted statement: “Maybe you can help her carry her groceries out to her camel, too.” Fatima exits, and Roseanne gives the cashier a piece of her mind:

“You know that saying, ‘See something, say something?’ Well I saw something, and I’m gonna say something to your manager,” she says. “You’re ignorant. That woman is twice the person you’ll ever be, and she’s dealing with a lot of stuff that you don’t even know about. So next time she comes into the store, you keep your mouth shut. She has enough fertilizer to turn this place into a smoking hole in the ground.”

As the episode draws to a close, Roseanne is awakened in the middle of the night by a knock at the door. It’s Samir, who’s come to thank Roseanne and pay back the $30 for the groceries. “Did you have to bring it back at two in the morning?” she asks. “Yes,” he replies, with a grin suggesting they’re now even.

Elsewhere in the episode…

* Dan and Chuck (Grey’s Anatomy‘s James Pickens Jr.) lose out on a drywall gig when their employer decides to use undocumented, nonunion workers instead.

* D.J. reveals to Dan that he’s been seeing a therapist ever since he got back from Syria. What’s more, the VA hasn’t been able to secure him a job. This in turn spawns an idea: Father and son will go into business together repairing motorcycles to make ends meet.

24 PHOTOS
Roseanne Barr through the years
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Roseanne Barr through the years
THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JOHNNY CARSON -- Air Date 11/06/1985 -- Pictured: Comedian Roseanne Barr performs on November 6, 1985 (Photo by Gene Arias/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE -- Episode 13 -- Pictured: Roseanne Barr as operator during 'MetroCard' skit on February 16, 1991 -- (Photo by: Alan Singer/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
ROSEANNE - 'Pretty in Black' which aired on October 13, 1992. (Photo by ABC Photo Archives/ABC via Getty Images) ROSEANNE BARR
THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JAY LENO -- Episode 10/30/1995 -- Pictured: (l-r) Actress Roseanne Barr during an interview with host Jay Leno on October 30, 1995 -- (Photo by: Margaret Norton/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
375669 01: 1998 Roseanne Barr Of The Roseanne Show. (Photo By Getty Images)
1998 Roseanne Barr Of The Roseanne Show. (Photo By Getty Images)
E364920 03: Comedienne Roseanne Barr poses with her husband Ben Thomas at the launch of her new CD titled 'I Just Can''t Help Myself' at the Tower Records store in Hollywood, California, February 21, 2000. The star performed with her band 'DiXXX' whom her husband is a member. (Photo by Chris Martinez)
382709 04: Actress Roseanne Barr and her husband Ben Thomas arrive at Project Angel Food''s Eight Annual 'Devine Design' Galla at the Pacific Design Center November 30, 2000 in West Hollywood, CA. The events proceeds go directly to Project Angel Food which provides free nutritional counseling and life-sustaining meals each day to 1,2000 men, women and children disabled by HIV/AIDS. (Photo byNewsmakers)
385218 39: Actress Roseanne Barr attends February 5, 2001 at the Lane Bryant fashion show at Studio 54 in New York City. (Photo by George De Sota/Newsmakers)
LAS VEGAS, NV - NOVEMBER 18: Comedian/actress Roseanne Barr poses at the 'Comic Relief 2006' show at The Colosseum at Caesars Palace November 18, 2006 in Las Vegas, Nevada. The benefit was held to help families in the Gulf Coast affected by Hurricane Katrina. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD - OCTOBER 23: Actress Roseanne Barr (L) with actor Will Ferrell (R) and wife Viveca Paulin arrive at the premiere of 'Borat: Cultural Learnings Of America' held at the Grauman's Chinese Theatre on October 23, 2006 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD, CA - AUGUST 04: Actress/writer Roseanne Barr arrives at the Comedy Central Roast of Roseanne Barr at Hollywood Palladium on August 4, 2012 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)
HOLLYWOOD, CA - AUGUST 04: Roastee Roseanne Barr onstage during the Comedy Central Roast of Roseanne Barr at Hollywood Palladium on August 4, 2012 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MARCH 10: Actress Roseanne Barr attends The Paley Center For Media's 2014 PaleyFest Icon Award announcement at The Paley Center for Media on March 10, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 18: (EDITORS NOTE: This image was processed using digital filters) Roseanne Barr attends the world premiere of documentary: 'Roseanne For President!' during the 2015 Tribeca Film Festival at SVA Theatre on April 18, 2015 in New York City. (Photo by Grant Lamos IV/Getty Images for the 2015 Tribeca Film Festival)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MARCH 10: Actress Roseanne Barr attends The Paley Center For Media's 2014 PaleyFest Icon Award announcement at The Paley Center for Media on March 10, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)
WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA - MARCH 23: Actress Roseanne Barr attends the 2015 Tribeca Film Festival LA Kickoff Reception at The Standard, Hollywood on March 23, 2015 in West Hollywood, California. (Photo by Mike Windle/Getty Images for Tribeca Film Festival)
WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA - NOVEMBER 23: Roseanne Barr (L) attends the cinema prive And PANDORA Jewelry Host A Special Screening Of 'Cake' on November 23, 2014 in West Hollywood, California. (Photo by Araya Diaz/Getty Images for cinema prive)
NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 18: Roseanne Barr (C) and children Jake Pentland (L) and Brandi Brown attend the world premiere of documentary: 'Roseanne For President!' during the 2015 Tribeca Film Festival at SVA Theatre on April 18, 2015 in New York City. (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images for the 2015 Tribeca Film Festival)
LOS ANGELES, CA - JULY 01: Actress Roseanne Barr attends the photo call for Roseanne Barr's 'Roseanne For President!' at Sundance Sunset Cinema on July 01, 2016 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Michael Boardman/FilmMagic)
LOS ANGELES, CA - JULY 01: Actress Roseanne Barr attends the photo call for Roseanne Barr's 'Roseanne For President!' at Sundance Sunset Cinema on July 1, 2016 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Tommaso Boddi/WireImage,,)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA - JANUARY 07: Roseanne Barr attends The 75th Annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 7, 2018 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)
BEVERLY HILLS, CA - JANUARY 07: Actors John Goodman (L) and Roseanne Barr celebrate The 75th Annual Golden Globe Awards with Moet & Chandon at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 7, 2018 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Michael Kovac/Getty Images for Moet & Chandon)
PASADENA, CA - JANUARY 08: Roseanne Barr attends the Disney ABC Television Group hosts TCA Winter Press Tour 2018 held at The Langham Huntington on January 8, 2018 in Pasadena, California. (Photo by Michael Tran/FilmMagic)
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