This post is dark and full of spoilers.
Game of Thrones is a lot of things — but funny isn't usually one of them.
That's probably due to the fact that showrunners David Benioff and Dan Weiss wrote the premiere (they also scripted another of the show's most memorably quippy episodes, "Kissed By Fire," back in Season 3), and since no one we love died or was horribly tortured in the episode, maybe they thought there was no harm in giving us a few jokes before the shit hits the fan.
The episode started out with some deliciously black humor, as Arya Stark impersonated Walder Frey (the crotchety old traitor she killed in the Season 6 finale) to poison all of his remaining family members in revenge for their part in the Red Wedding, which killed Arya's mother, brother, and a whole heap of their allies.
Later, the internet lost its mind over Ed Sheeran's cameo, but that was more a case of laughing at him, not with him.
But most of the episode's chuckles came courtesy of Cersei, Jaime, and Euron Greyjoy, who apparently spent his time off getting rock and roll makeover tips from Once Upon a Time's Captain Hook.
Once Euron arrived, he spent most of his scene throwing epic shade at Jaime, all while doing his best to impress Cersei. "Ever since I was a little boy, I wanted to grow up and marry the most beautiful woman in the world, so here I am with a thousand ships and two good hands," he smirked, proudly displaying his working digits for Jaime.
He didn't stop there. When Cersei pointed out that Euron was deeply untrustworthy because, "You murdered your own brother," he gleefully suggested, "You should try it, it feels wonderful." Jaime's expression was priceless.
Then there was the extended montage of poor Samwell Tarly's adventures in poop shoveling — admittedly, it kind of made us gag a little too, but the delightfully escalating rhythm of the cuts (and the almost musical quality of the slopping liquids) was as spectacular as it was gross.
The show has developed its characters so well, they don't even have to speak to make us laugh — there's nothing better than watching Tormund sashay up to Brienne like the creeper he is and watch her sigh with resignation at his unwanted attention.
But the delivery of the night goes to Sansa, who puts Petyr Baelish in his place with a few well-chosen words.
"What do you want that you do not have?" Littlefinger asks at one point, getting all up in her grill, as usual.
"At the moment, peace and quiet," Sansa retorts, with all of her mother's withering disdain. When he attempts to restart the conversation, she easily cuts him off: "No need to seize the last word, Lord Baelish, I'll assume it was something clever."
Sassy looks good on you, Game of Thrones, you should try it more often.