Snooping through Hillary Clinton's email: The hackers, hummus, and 'home girls' edition

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6,000 New Hillary Clinton Emails Set to Be Released


If it's the end of the month, it can only mean one thing: it's time to dig through Hillary Clinton's old State Department emails for evidence of gross misconduct and/or mundane tidbits about her personal life. In this month's 6,000-page trove, Clinton and company seem weirdly confident that the Chinese have no interest in spying on the U.S. secretary of state, we learn some unsurprising information about Clinton's political ambitions (or lack thereof) in 2012, and her friendship with Senator Barbara Mikulski takes a troubling turn. Read on for all this, and Clinton's recommendations for healthy, politically charged snack foods.

Unsurprisingly, Clinton never took Dick Cheney's suggestion that she challenge President Obama in 2012 seriously, but her aides were worried that America would.

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Though candidate Clinton is solidly pro-nontraditional families, she was once worried about how Fox News and Sarah Palin would react to swapping the terms "Mother" and "Father" for "Parent One" and "Parent Two" on passport applications.

While discussing State Department staffer Nora Toiv's gmail account, Clinton joked that her private email must have been hacked by the Chinese. Three years later they stole data on 4 million federal employees, but obviously the idea of the Chinese getting into the unsanctioned private server in Clinton's basement is laughable.

See Clinton responding to the email scandal:

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Snooping through Hillary Clinton's email: The hackers, hummus, and 'home girls' edition
Representative Susan Brooks, a Republican from Indiana, questions Hillary Clinton, former U.S. secretary of state and 2016 Democratic presidential candidate, not pictured, during a House Select Committee on Benghazi hearing in Washington, D.C., U.S., on Thursday, Oct. 22, 2015. Under scrutiny for her handling of the Benghazi attacks and her use of a private e-mail server, Clinton plans to invoke the memory of slain U.S. ambassador Christopher Stevens to defend her approach to diplomacy, saying they shared a common belief in the need for America to lead. Photographer: Pete Marovich/Bloomberg via Getty Images
Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton speaks at an event at the New York University Leonard N. Stern School of Business in New York on July 24, 2015. The Justice Department said it had received a request to probe whether Hillary Clinton mishandled sensitive government information by using her private email for State Department business. 'The Department has received a referral related to the potential compromise of classified information,' a department official said in a brief statement that confirmed in part a story that first appeared in The New York Times. AFP PHOTO/ KENA BETANCUR (Photo credit should read KENA BETANCUR/AFP/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - MARCH 10: Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks to the media after keynoting a Women's Empowerment Event at the United Nations March 10, 2015 in New York City. Clinton answered questions about recent allegations of an improperly used email account during her tenure as secretary of state. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
Hillary Clinton answers questions from reporters March 10, 2015 at the United Nations in New York. Clinton admitted Tuesday that she made a mistake in choosing for convenience not to use an official email account when she was secretary of state. But, in remarks to reporters after attending a United Nations event, she insisted that her email set-up had been properly secure and that she had turned over all professional communications to the State Department. AFP PHOTO/DON EMMERT (Photo credit should read DON EMMERT/AFP/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - MARCH 10: Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks to the media after keynoting a Women's Empowerment Event at the United Nations March 10, 2015 in New York City. Clinton answered questions about recent allegations of an improperly used email account during her tenure as secretary of state. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - MARCH 10: Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks to the media after keynoting a Women's Empowerment Event at the United Nations March 10, 2015 in New York City. Clinton answered questions about recent allegations of an improperly used email account during her tenure as secretary of state. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - MARCH 10: Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks to the media after keynoting a Women's Empowerment Event at the United Nations March 10, 2015 in New York City. Clinton answered questions about recent allegations of an improperly used email account during her tenure as secretary of state. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - MARCH 10: Huma Abedin (R), aide to former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, looks on during a news conference following Clinton's keynote speech at a Women's Empowerment Event at the United Nations. Clinton answered questions about recent allegations of an improperly used email account during her tenure as secretary of state. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
WASHINGTON, DC - MARCH 03: Chairman Trey Gowdy (R-SC) and other members of the House Select Committee on Benghazi speak to reporters at a press conference on the findings of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's personal emails at the U.S. Capitol on March 3, 2015 in Washington, D.C. The New York Times reported that Clinton may have violated the law by using a personal email account for official business at the State Department. (Photo by Gabriella Demczuk/Getty Images)
WASHINGTON, DC - MARCH 03: Peter Roskam (R-IL), Susan Brooks (R-IN) and Chairman Trey Gowdy (R-SC) of the House Select Committee on Benghazi speak to reporters at a press conference on the findings of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's personal emails at the U.S. Capitol on March 3, 2015 in Washington, D.C. The New York Times reported that Clinton may have violated the law by using a personal email account for official business at the State Department. (Photo by Gabriella Demczuk/Getty Images)
Hillary Clinton answers questions from reporters March 10, 2015 at the United Nations in New York. Clinton admitted Tuesday that she made a mistake in choosing for convenience not to use an official email account when she was secretary of state. But, in remarks to reporters after attending a United Nations event, she insisted that her email set-up had been properly secure and that she had turned over all professional communications to the State Department. AFP PHOTO/DON EMMERT (Photo credit should read DON EMMERT/AFP/Getty Images)
WASHINGTON, DC - MARCH 03: Chairman Trey Gowdy (R-SC) of the House Select Committee on Benghazi speaks to reporters at a press conference on the findings of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's personal emails at the U.S. Capitol on March 3, 2015 in Washington, D.C. The New York Times reported that Clinton may have violated the law by using a personal email account for official business at the State Department. (Photo by Gabriella Demczuk/Getty Images)
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Just a few months later, Russian hackers actually did try to hack into Clinton's email by sending her several emails claiming she received speeding tickets in New York. Clinton spokesman Nick Merril said, "All these e-mails show is that, like millions of other Americans, she received spam." He also noted there's "no evidence" that Clinton clicked on the attachment or bought the widespread email scheme. Presumably it was obvious that the tickets weren't real, since Clinton hasn't driven a car since 1996.

Aide Anne-Marie Slaughter noted that the State Department's technology was so terrible that everyone was using unsecure private accounts. Clinton said publicizing the problem made "good sense," but her chief of staff, Cheryl Mills, countered, "I am not sure we want to telegraph how much folks do or don't do off state mail b/c it may encourage [hackers] who are out there."

Also Read: Body of 18-year-old missing for 7 years found in chimney

Somehow we doubt that this is the weirdest exchange Bill Clinton has ever been a part of, but it's probably up there.

The Clintons meet a lot of colorful characters, and can't be expected to remember all of them. Yet, Senator Chris Coons was reportedly upset that Clinton forgot his name. Maybe she was confused because he's actually the guy who beat the lady who isn't a witch.

Clinton's exchanges with gal pal/Senator Barbara Mikulski have gotten weirder in each dispatch. Last time Clinton suggested that they "go drink something unhealthy," and this time she became the first human to use the term "home girl" and Harriet Tubman in the same sentence.

While Clinton can work a Harriet Tubman quote into casual conversation, somehow she has no idea what FUBAR means – and her staff won't enlighten her.

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Previous emails raised questions about why Clinton was asking her staff about easily searchable things, like what time Parks and Rec is on. This email reveals that Clinton knows Google exists, she's just not very good at using it.

Email is hard too, so sometimes Clinton just lets aide Huma Abedin use her account.

Even using the phone is difficult for Clinton, but this isn't a technology issue, it's a famous person issue.

This month's email dispatch was brought to you by the makers of delicious Sabra hummus. Spread the World!

RELATED: Click through to read the 10 Hillary Clinton facts you should know:

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Snooping through Hillary Clinton's email: The hackers, hummus, and 'home girls' edition

1. She went by her maiden for years after she married Bill in 1975. She went by "Mrs. Bill Clinton" shortly after her husband lost the 1980 Arkansas gubernatorial election in part because voters had questioned their marriage's stability.

(Photo by Douglas Burrows/Liaison)

2. She once described herself as a tomboy who wanted to be an astronaut, and wrote to NASA as a 12-year-old about how she could become an astronaut. They sent her a reply, clarifying that NASA didn't accept women in their astronaut program.

(Photo by Karin Cooper, Getty)

3. She was the student speaker picked to give the commencement speech at Wellesley, and received a standing ovation.

(Photo by John Mottern, AFP/Getty Images)

6. In 1974, she was one of only three women out of 43 lawyers who worked on the inquiry into whether President Nixon would be impeached.

(Photo by David Hume Kennerly/Getty Images)

7. She named her daughter Chelsea after Joni Mitchell's song "Chelsea Morning."

(Photo by Daniel Berehulak/Getty Images)

9. She says she met Bill Clinton at the Yale law library when she approached him and said, "Look if you're going to keep staring at me, and I'm going to keep staring back, I think we should at least know each other. I'm Hillary Rodham. What's your name?"

(Photo by Mark Philips, AFP/Getty Images)

10. Her mother told her that she had been named after Sir Edmund Hillary, who was the first man to to climb Everest, despite the fact that he had done so five years after she was born. A spokesperson for Clinton has said that this was a "sweet family story her mother shared to inspire greatness in her daughter, to great results I might add."

(Photo by Vincent Laforet, AFP/Getty Images)

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