7 Modern 'Conveniences' That Are Killing the Holiday Joy—Plus, What to Do Instead

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We’ve all been there: bogged down with work, family, and other responsibilities and staring at a holiday to-do list a mile long. To get it all done, we increasingly take holiday shortcuts that, for me anyway, occur on my laptop or phone late at night. There, I can I shop for nearly anything and everything, from holiday decorations and luxury Advent calendars to gifts for the women, men, and kids in my life. I can even pop out a quick email about a holiday meal, including a link to Signup Genius which allows me to assign each guest a task for the occasion. No time for handwritten holiday cards and thank you notes? No problem: There are scores of websites that will send digital greetings of all kinds to every contact in my (digital) address book.

In the multitasking, instant gratification world in which we increasingly live, it’s possible to do more than one thing at the same time: We can cook dinner while we check holiday shopping off our lists; we can supervise bath time while we print address labels for cards, and we can order our decorations while we walk our dogs. But this increased efficiency comes at a serious cost—especially during the holidays. Where is the creativity in plugging in the same inflatable holiday character bobbing about in every other yard on your street? And where’s the love and thoughtfulness ordering your sister another item from her Amazon wish list? And where oh where is the gracious hospitality in serving a holiday meal on paper plates you ordered online to spare yourself washing dishes?

In all our success at doing more, we’ve fooled ourselves into believing doing more is actually better. Perhaps it’s time to scale back our efforts so we can do them well, with more love and creativity. Doing less, but with more thoughtfulness and intention, is likely to reduce the amount of time we spend on screens as well as the environmental impact of our celebrating—and what could be a better holiday gift to ourselves, each other and the earth?

This year, VERANDA editors shared the holiday shortcuts that irk them most, along with ideas for how to restore the joy that comes with time-honored traditions. Read on for inspiration in how you can bring back the magic of the season.

Holiday shortcut: Decorating only with store-bought decorations (we see you, lawn inflatables).

Inflatables will certainly delight the kiddos in your life—but so will spending time to make your own holiday decorations.

How to Restore the Joy

Inflatables or not, every house deserves natural trimmings for the holidays. Taking the time to get a little creative, with or without the help of your family, will also help put you in the holiday spirit (even with a little Griswold-level frustration). This year, we’re especially into old-fashioned wreath and garland ideas that express so much personality and individuality. We’re also partial to single candles in each window (like these cordless versions complete with remote control and timer), a holiday decorating tradition that dates back to the Colonial period when the lit candles signaled hospitality. And, don’t forget about homemade trimmings for the interior of your home: This year, our nostalgia is steering us towards making pomander balls (clove-pierced oranges that release a festive fragrance as the fruit dries) and cranberry and popcorn garlands.

Holiday shortcut: Perfuming your home with artificial seasonal scents.

We don't have anything against luxury candles and home fragrances, it’s just at this time of year we much prefer the natural kind. Bonus: You don't have to worry about accidentally leaving a candle burning while you're running around.

How to Restore the Joy

Nothing sets a festive tone like the scent of fresh-cut winter greenery. We love to mix varieties, from Balsam and Fraser fir to pine and cedar or even eucalyptus. We’re also fans of creating natural scent arrangements comprising seasonal elements like cinnamon sticks, herbs, and even myrrh.

For those allergic to pine, fir, and cedar, don’t fret: There are plenty of seasonal scents that won’t send you sneezing. Consider fresh baked goods like holiday spice cookies or pumpkin anything, simmering mulled cider, tea or wine on the stove, or even pomander balls.

Holiday Shortcut: Sending digital greeting cards.

We get it: Paper cards are more time-consuming and more expensive, but we also promise they will make your recipients feel so loved.

How to Restore the Joy

We’re big believers in sending paper holiday cards and (gasp!) addressing each one by hand. Because let’s be honest: These days, it takes a little something extra for your greeting to stand out among the barrage of information coming at us all the time, from every direction.

If you rely on email to deliver your holiday greeting, there’s a big chance it will get lost within your loved ones’ already-full inboxes, especially if they have given themselves the gift of an email-free vacation. Even paper cards can get lost in a sea of junk mail without personalized handwriting, or at least an elegant font that mimics script. If it takes paring down your list to send hand-addressed paper cards, we believe it’s worth it!

Holiday shortcut: Relying exclusively on loved ones’ wish lists for holiday gifting.

Most of the time, this just feels like buying something for the sake of buying something—and contributing to the proliferation of stuff during the holidays.

How to Restore the Joy

It’s time to get back to more meaningful giving, which can be one of the biggest sources of joy during the holiday season. First things first: We suggest paring down your recipient list to only those most important to you, so that you have more time shop—or make!—thoughtfully.

Consider a holiday gift that will allow family members to commemorate a certain moment or memory. Shop for gifts that will inspire loved ones to indulge in a hobby or creative endeavor. Take the time to shop local, vintage, handmade, and one-of-a-kind when you can to support small businesses and artisans. And contemplate pooling family money that would have been spent on gifts for a trip or experience that can be shared—or as a charitable gift towards an organization you collectively support.

Holiday shortcut: Assembling off-the-shelf gingerbread house kits.

Sure, it's easier to go buy a gingerbread kit from the grocery store, but where's the imagination, originality, and fun in that? Plus, homemade versions taste way better.

How to Restore the Joy

Every holiday season calls for a little festive competition, and gingerbread houses offer the ideal opportunity to organize a neighborhood bakeoff. Let each family design his or her own cookie home, decorating their slightly off-kilter walls with oddball candies (gummy gators lurking outside? Yes please), glittery sprinkles and a half dozen marshmallow chimneys. Let the youngest among us pick the winning wackiest holiday house.

Holiday shortcut: Serving special meals on paper plates.

We know, we know—not all fine china, especially vintage china, can go in the dishwasher. And hand-washing dishes for hours can be a real drag. But the holidays only come once a year, and you can recruit the whole family for post-meal cleanup if need be. Not to mention, paper plates and plastic cutlery aren't exactly environmentally friendly.

How to Restore the Joy

Set a special table for this special time of year. Dust off your dinnerware, polish up the silver—if not now, when? At VERANDA, we believe there’s a case to be made for using the good stuff everyday, not just during the holidays.

There’s an art to the ritual of setting a table, and it can be shared across generations. “You're offering someone a gift when you share your treasures and welcome them to your table,” says Ajiri Aki, whose sells vintage tableware and table linens at Madame de la Maison.

The best way to keep that silver polished? Use it more often and run it through a dishwasher (so long as you don’t mix with stainless steel). If you don’t have enough dinner plates to feed your guest list, mix in vintage pieces for a more cost-effective way to beef up your collection.

Holiday Shortcut: Dressing down for dinner.

Speaking of special holiday meals, we’re calling for a return to festive dress—no more loungewear or athleisure, even if you might feel like lounging after your feast.

How to Restore the Joy

Ok, we know most are gathering with primarily family during the holidays—but just because you’re spending time with those who have known you for a long time doesn’t mean you have to abandon all sense of formality.

Dressing up helps make the moment stand out from the rest, especially since casual style is so widely accepted in almost every aspect of our lives these days. Donning something a little more festive can also help boost your own sense of occasion and even your sense of self-worth. Most importantly: It’s fun and will make your family holiday photos all the more beautiful.

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