7 things we learned from Durham’s Jesse Lopez about his epic ‘Survivor’ journey

Jesse Lopez knows he came close to winning $1 million.

If things had gone his way during Season 43 of CBS’s reality show, “Survivor,” the Duke University Ph.D. candidate would have come home to Durham from Fiji a lot richer.

Lopez, 30, headed into the finale a clear favorite to snag the prize, thanks to his ruthless gameplay that included engineering a cutthroat blindside of his closest ally. But in the end, his torch got snuffed after the season’s eventual winner, Mike Gabler, defeated him in a brutal fire-making challenge.

“From what I’ve heard, I would have won pretty solidly at the end,” Lopez told The News & Observer in a video interview this week, just days after the season finale aired.

“You could see in the show,” he said from his home office in Durham. “They were crying when I left. They were invested in me.”

It was a crushing end for the former gang member, who had turned his life around after ending up in juvenile detention at the age of 15. His story became a key part of his experience on the show that strands 18 people on an island for up to 26 days. “Survivor” tests castaways’ physical, emotional and social skills through challenges and the reality of living on an island without the food and comforts of home.

Lopez, who is married with two young kids, frequently talked on the show about wanting to win to make his children proud and to provide a monetary safety net for his family back home. His story earned earned him a legion of fans, but also some detractors.

Lopez talked to The N&O about his experience on the long-running competition. Here are some of the biggest takeaways from the conversation.

He struggled growing up.

Originally from Venice, Calif., Lopez said he had few role models growing up.

“My dad was a gang member,” he said. “My sister was involved in drugs. My grandma had been a prison. There was just a lot of like substance abuse issues in my family. I’d never seen anybody go to college. My mom was constantly at work. That left me sort of like open to pursue things that I probably shouldn’t have at that time.”

He joined a gang and was arrested multiple times — his first time at 14 — before being incarcerated in juvenile hall.

“That’s sort of the turning point for me,” he said. “I met organizations and people who were willing to invest time and energy in me. They got me to take my GED. They provided me with sorts of educational programs like creative writing. That was big for me.”

Eventually, he went to community college, then the University of California, Berkeley for undergrad and later, Duke. He earned both a master’s degree and Ph.D. in political science at Duke. Now he studies voting behavior at Duke as a National Science Foundation Research Fellow.

He met his wife in elementary school.

By the time he was in juvenile hall, the woman who became his wife was his girlfriend. Despite his troubles, Rebecca still stood by him, he said.

“She was writing me letters every day and just showing me support,” he said. “She was willing to be there at my side, no matter what decision I made in terms of going forward.”

She helped him turn his life around, he said. “Just having that full-on support network was a huge thing,” he said.

His most memorable ‘Survivor’ moment was also his lowest.

Arguably one of the most brutal moves in the game’s history, Lopez convinced his ally Cody Assenmacher to let him hold onto his hidden immunity idol, which would allow him to remain in the game, even if people voted for him. But to Assenmacher’s surprise, Lopez used it against him in a treacherous backstab on the penultimate episode.

Lopez explains it was a lot harder than it looked. “Sitting down next to Cody after doing what I did, looking over and seeing his face, that was really rough. I don’t think that comes through on TV,” he said.

“For me, I had been with Cody since day one. He put so much trust in me and showed me a lot of his heart,” Lopez said. “But again, I kept reminding myself that as cool as these relationships are that I’m building, I’ve got promises that I made to people back home that are going to trump whatever I have out here.”

Lopez said the pair remain friends, despite the gameplay. “The first time I saw Cody after the game, we shook hands and hugged. I checked on him and was like, ‘Are we good?’ He said, ‘Yeah.’ Cody handled himself well.

“He visited me over the summer, and we talk all the time. There’s no bad blood between us.”

He doesn’t see himself as a villain.

While Lopez’s gameplay won praise from many die-hard “Survivor” fans, others were quick to throw vitriol his way on Twitter and label him a villain. Lopez disagrees.

“I made cutthroat moves that were in my best interest. If it comes off as villainous to people, then that’s up to the people to decide,” he said. “From my perspective, we’re all the heroes in our own story, right? I was just doing what I had to do to get to the end. Maybe I’m a good, bad guy.”

He believes he would have won if he made it to the end.

Despite not winning an individual challenge all season, Lopez said he could have convinced the jury, a group of ousted players who vote for the winner, why he deserved the $1 million.

“I feel like I had everyone’s vote if I made the final three,” he said.

If he’d won, he would have kept the money.

In the end, Gabler, 52, a heart valve specialist who lives in Idaho, won the prize after securing seven out of eight votes. He announced after winning he will donate the prize to the Veterans in Need Foundation in honor of his father.

Lopez applauded the decision, but acknowledged he didn’t consider doing the same.

“I’m in a different position than Gabler. It’s a generous decision. He’s a caring and extremely kind person for what he’s doing, for sure.”

He’s ready for an All-Stars season of “Survivor.”

After four straight seasons featuring new castaways, “Survivor” fans have speculated when there will be an all-stars season. Those fans are already pleading for Lopez to be cast.

Lopez said he doesn’t know what his chances are since producers typically don’t share such details. But he’s game to try again.

“They don’t tell me,” he said. “But if I ever get a phone call, I’m immediately going to hit the gym because I need to win a challenge.”