Give These Realtors a Reality Check! (Listing Fails)

As #houseporn fiends and real estate junkies, there's nothing we love more than poring through fabulous home listings -- except maybe sorting through the tragically un-fabulous ones. They'll definitely make you laugh, and some of them could make you cry. Every week, AOL Real Estate brings you the sorriest listings we could find on the Internet to show you what you should never do when posting your home online. We very appropriately call it #listingfail.

This Week's Theme: Realtors in Need of a Reality Check

There are so many talking points in this advertisement for Canadian real estate firm Brad J. Lamb Realty that we don't even know where to start. There's Brad's head in an astronaut helmet attached to what looks like a sheep's body wearing space boots. There's the space shuttle attached to Brad's neck. And all of this is happening somewhere above earth ... where Brad, your Realtor, is "miles above the competition."

Now, we love a little humor (we created #housepornthurs and #listingfail, after all), and we get the sentiment behind the ad, but let's not mince words. This ad is just bad. Even Brad looks a little uncomfortable with it!

Our suggestion? When it comes to Realtor ads, professionalism and simplicity are the keys to success. Remember that your ad is your professional calling card, and buying a house is one of the most significant financial decisions a person will make in their lifetime. Photoshopping your head onto a floating moon-sheep is just tacky and may, er, alienate potential clients.

(Ad courtesy of Keeping It Realtor).

Have you been a naughty house hunter? Or are you a seller that's looking to get filthy ... rich? If you're looking for a sexy piece of real estate, call Allyse for a good time and ask about her private showings.

Editor's tip: Realtors, to avoid being mistaken for a phone sex hotline, please lose the phone (and sultry look) in your business card picture. A classic head-and-shoulders Realtor headshot is tried and tested, and it looks infinitely more professional and less ... suggestive.

(Ad courtesy of Realadtor.)

Does this ad from Keller Williams Realtor Jeff Hughes make you ... squirm? We thought it went without saying, but(t) if your ad reminds people of a prostate exam, they're not likely to want your representation. We get that Jeff wants homeowners to know that when it comes to selling your home, he's behind you. But don't go too far with that metaphor, please.

(Ad courtesy of Realadtor blog).

For more hilarious, "Reality Check Realtors" #listingfails, see the gallery below.

Realtors Who Need a Reality Check
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Give These Realtors a Reality Check! (Listing Fails)

Cruella, is that you? You've changed your hair! Someone please tell Realtor Anna Duncan to turn that frown upside down. Homes, sweet homes, don't sell when you look like your mom just died, girlfriend!

(Ad courtesy of Realadtors.)

We're just trying to figure out what's meant by "connected." Who are these guys? Is it just us or does Tony seem to be going for a "Sopranos" vibe? ("I know a guy..." you can just picture him saying.) If so, do you really want these good fellas handling your "contract"?

Maybe we've just seen "The Godfather" too many times.

(Ad courtesy of Realadtors.)

Like most things in life, when it comes to Realtors, you may have to kiss many frogs before you find a "Printz." 

(Ad courtesy of Keeping It Realtor.)

It's not polite to discuss politics at the dinner table -- or in your real estate ad. But clearly, the Theisens aren't afraid to mix business with their defense of Second Amendment rights. Wouldn't wanna mess with them.

(Ad courtesy of Keeping It Realtor.)

Cheesy, we know. Corny, even. But, hey, you'll never forget her name!

(Ad courtesy of -- where you can find numerous variations of the above picture.)

Although, staring at this ad for too long might make you nauseous. An upside-down mugshot flanked by sideways text, a right-side-up RE/MAX balloon logo and a call to action? Here's a tip, Realtors. When it comes to ads, keep it simple.

(Ad courtesy of Realadtors.)

If this doesn't get homebuyers excited, nothing will.

(Ad courtesy of Cheezburger.)

You can't not sell your home when you have Eliza Marie Eugune (rocking a serious "this-means-business" pose) and God on your side! 

(Ad courtesy of Realadtors.)

All we can say is BURN.

(Ad courtesy of Billboardom.)


Don't let your home be a #listingfail! Take some pro advice from our home staging guides:
Home Staging Mistakes Sellers Should Avoid
Home Staging Tips for Every Season
Home Staging: Hire a Pro or Do It Yourself?

Join the conversation! Tweet us listing fails @aolrealestate and hashtag #listingfail, and you could get a shout-out in next week's post!

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