As #houseporn fiends and real estate junkies, there's nothing we love more than poring through fabulous home listings -- except maybe sorting through the tragically un-fabulous ones. They'll definitely make you laugh, and some of them could make you cry. Every week, AOL Real Estate brings you the sorriest listings we could find on the Internet to show you what you should never do when posting your home online. We very appropriately call it #listingfail.
This Week's Theme: Animal-Crazy Listings
First of all: Vegetarians, look away. Secondly, we have nothing against mounting one or two of your taxidermic big-game kills, but a whole room of them is just plain creepy. (Is that an elephant head on the back wall?) This looks less like a home and more like an exhibit at the American Museum of Natural History. That, or the owners of this Florida home want to go on a permanent safari.
Let's just cut the small talk and address the elephant in the room -- or, rather, the dead bear sprawled across the floor. If that doesn't scare off shoppers, there's a backup stuffed bear, plus what looks like a taxidermied cheetah. A word to the wise: If it's dead, it won't help you sell your home.
For more hilarious, animal-crazy #listingfails see the gallery below.
Crazy Animal Listing Fails
Don't Let Dead Animals Kill Your Home Sale (Listing Fails)
The saddest thing about this picture is that this home would actually be quite pretty without the decapitated dead animals mounted mercilessly to that charming, salmon-hued wall (picture it). Nothing a little Photoshop couldn't have fixed, but alas.
Same goes for this picture. A stunning room with wood paneling, built-in bookshelves and a marble fireplace speaks for itself. It certainly doesn't need a creepy collection of deer heads to speak for it.
We have nothing to say about this room, except that we'd hate to be here alone in the dark. (Please refer to scenes from "Night at the Museum").
A surefire way to not get your house sold, folks, is to hang a sorry-looking dead animal skin on your wall. It's just about enough to turn us vegetarian for life.
These walls have eyes.
Homeowners: your listing photos are supposed to be inviting, not terrifying! Please remove the taxidermied crocodile from behind your couch and into a closet where he can't give anyone a heart attack.