We'll save you the "Celebrities: They're Just Like Us!" spiel today, because let's face it -- they're not. While we humble plebeians are busy seeking mortgage assistance and mourning our plummeting home values, our favorite celebs are busy playing millionaire Monopoly. Whether it's flinging one Miami manse on the market to nab another or playing musical houses with their multimillion-dollar California beach houses, it seems that our favorite A-listers just don't know what else to do with their money. But we're not complaining because that just means more real estate eye candy for us! Here are our favorite celeb houses on the market (in no particular order).
Celine Dion's Island Getaway
Price: $29.655 million
Location: Quebec, Canada
Details: We love Queen Celine. She recorded nine albums before she turned 18 years old, she's a five-time Grammy winner, she earns about $100 million a year and she owns this incredible house -- which is built on a private island. Known as the Gagnon Mansion and located in Quebec, Canada, the opulent home is built like a French Norman chateau and boasts 24,000 square feet. We're not sure of the exact interior aesthetic that the "greatest singer in the word" was going for, though it looks like a cross between Versailles and Tara in "Gone With the Wind." And that's not a bad thing, especially if you like chandeliers, winding staircases, plush red velvet carpets and soaring, coffered ceilings. The home also features a vaulted stone wine cellar with integrated tasting room, a paneled library, a gym and its very own helipad. Naturally. Joseph Montanaro of Sotheby's International Realty, Quebec, has the listing.
Martin Lawrence's California Contemporary
Price: $200,000 a month
Location:Beverly Hills, Calif.
Martin Lawrence may be known for his comedic talents, but there's nothing funny about this stunning home that he's renting out for a very serious $200,000 a month. While the "Bad Boys" star's 13,900-square-foot French contemporary is a surefire looker, $200,000 is a whole lot of coin. Granted, you get a movie theater with concession stand, a 1,000-square-foot gym, a wine room and sprawling living and dining spaces. It's also really pretty. Pink marble finishes, marble floors and stained glass skylights by Salvatore Polizzi. Connie Blankenship of Hilton and Hyland has the listing.
Gianni Versace's Miami Palace
Price: $125 million
Versace's world famous home, built in 1930, is sprawled across 19,000 square feet. It features 10 bedrooms, 11 bathrooms, a 54-foot-long pool lined in 24-karat gold and ornate, Medusa-emblazoned front gates (the same gates where Versace was fatally shot in 1997). "This is not only the most well-known property on South Beach," said listing agent Jill Eber of Coldwell Banker, "it's also known worldwide for its attention to detail throughout every room, its elegance and its style." Its link to one of the world's most iconic fashion designers probably doesn't hurt, either. It boasts a 6,100-square-foot south wing, a mosaic-covered courtyard, frescoes on the home's walls and ceilings, and the aforementioned gold-lined pool. The Jills of Coldwell Banker have the listing.
Chris Brown's Hollywood Bachelor Pad
Price: $1.895 million
Location:West Hollywood, Calif.
Though singer Chris Brown may be a nightmare neighbor, we can't deny that his West Hollywood digs are a sweet, sweet dream. The sleek, 3,000-square-foot space boasts blond bamboo floors, double-paned windows, soaring ceilings and a wraparound terrace with city views. Additionally, the bathrooms are decked out in "designer appointments," and the kitchens boast Caesarstone counters and stainless steel appliances. Fit for an A-list singer-actor-rapper, indeed. Manuela Villa of The Agency has the listing.
Jim Carrey's Malibu Beach House
Price: $13.95 million
We have no idea why our favorite funnyman, Jim Carrey, would ever want to sell this sweet piece of real estate. (Check out that beachfront hot tub!) But our guess is that he'll be making a pretty penny on the home, if it sells at list price. Apparently, the "Liar Liar" star snagged it in 2002 for a significantly cheaper $9.7 million. Carrey's contemporary boasts an expansive rooftop deck with a hot tub and mood lights, offering gorgeous sunset and surf views. Inside, you get five spacious bedrooms, 5½ bathrooms and generous, museum-like living spaces sprawled across 2,866 square feet. Janelle Friedman of Sotheby's International Realty has the listing.
George Harrison's Swiss Castle
Location: Montagnola, Switzerland
"I don't care too much for the money," crooned the Beatles in their 1964 hit song, "For money can't buy me love." What it can buy, though, is Beatles lead guitarist George Harrison's sprawling, stately Swiss mansion. But we're not sure exactly how much money. The listing agents at Christie's International affiliate Wetag are keeping mum about how much the late Beatle's digs are going for. But we're assuming a ballpark figure of a whole lot (apparently Harrison had purchased the estate for $10 million back in 2001) because it's out of this world. The castle-like structure has views of scenic Lake Lugano, the Swiss Alps and Monte Rosa. The 10,800-square-foot main house boasts classic Palladian architecture and impeccable European craftsmanship. Standout features include a massive wine cellar, a four-story elevator and a Roman-style swimming pool.
Amy Winehouse's London Pad
Price: $4.2 million
Location: Camden Square, London
The beautiful home of the late Amy Winehouse has recently hit the market, less than one year after she had her fatal drug overdose there. Located in Camden Square in northwest London (pictured above), the three-bedroom apartment is listed for $4.2 million. Though Winehouse reportedly loved the home, the late singer's family members have said that, with great regret, they didn't feel "it was appropriate that they should live in it." The home boasts three double bedrooms, three reception rooms and "well-proportioned" private front and rear gardens. HouseNetwork UK has the listing.
Claire Danes' Manhattan Loft
Price: $5.99 million
Location:New York City
Claire Danes' classic 3,851-square-foot space features three bedrooms and three bathrooms. The building itself dates back to 1882, but the apartment has been restored with wooden beams and columns, beautifully blending old-school New York with modern conveniences. There's a rotating breakfast bar, which apparently is meant to give Danes extra space in the kitchen -- maybe to rehearse lines for her latest movie or to make homemade marshmallows. By the way, the home also once boasted a swing in the living room. (Oh, how the 1 percent live!). Elaine Schweninger of Town Real Estate has the listing.
Michael C. Hall's 'Killer' L.A. Mansion
Price: $1.995 million
"Dexter" fans rejoice: You, too, can live -- rather than die -- in the onscreen murderer's home. Well, his real-life home. "Dexter" star Michael C. Hall is selling his stunning home in The Outpost Estates for a killer price of $1.995 million. The 3,535-square-foot home features four bedrooms and five bathrooms. The master suite has a spacious master bathroom with views of Runyon Canyon. Both of the upstairs guest bedrooms have their own baths, and the basement gym/guest bedroom (/kill room) has its own ¾ bath. Jeff Kohl and Josh Myler of The Agency have the listing.
The Rolling Stones' (Rumored) NYC Townhouse
Price: $7.95 million
Location:New York City
This townhouse was rumored to be the home of the iconic rock and roll band The Rolling Stones for a brief time in the 1960s. According to the realtor, it was where hits such as "Sympathy for the Devil" and "Paint It Black" were penned. "While The Rolling Stones didn't own the house," listing agent Jeremy V. Stein told AOL Real Estate, "I do believe they did live there at some point." According to the listing, the Anglo-Italianate home has kept many of its original details, such as ornate plaster medallions and crown moldings, nine fireplaces with white marble mantels, skylights and an elliptical stairway. The 4,930-square-foot home features five bedrooms, five full bathrooms and a stunning, south-facing garden. Jeremy V. Stein and Robin Stein of Sotheby's International Realty have the listing.
More on AOL Real Estate:
Find out how to calculate mortgage payments.
Find homes for sale in your area.
See celebrity real estate.
Find homes for rent in your area.