One Touch Can Opener review: If it only kept working ...

The Product: One Touch Can Opener
The Price: $19.95, plus $6.95 shipping and handling
The Claims: "The last can opener you will ever buy"
Buy-O-Meter Rating: 1 out of 5

One Touch Can Opener broke my heart.

When I first met the sleek and automatic One Touch, I thought: "Where have you been all my life?"

The palm-sized gadget did everything it promised. And how often do you find one of those?

I placed the opener on top of a soup can, pushed its gray button and round and round it went until the can.... opened.

No messing around with the blade, trying to clamp it on the rim. Just set and go.

At first, One Touch opened everything -- regular cans of vegetables, as well as super-sized cans of soup. Nothing stopped it. Nothing slowed it down. It was like a machine. (OK, it was a machine.)

Then, about 10 days later, One Touch met a tiny can of tomato paste.

The opener started smoothly enough, but it soon ground to a halt, motionless, mute and difficult to pry off the half-opened lid.

After that, One Touch lost interest. Sometimes its gears would turn; others, it would just lay there, like a lox.

Desperate, I changed its batteries, because One Touch has a reputation for burning through batteries. But that didn't help.

I even gave One Touch a little slap, hoping that would turn it on. Nothing.

Thing is, I wasn't in the market for the latest model: My old manual opener had been an unfailing kitchen partner for more than 10 years.

But a little age, a little curiosity made my eye wander. And the shiny, new One Touch claimed it would never fail me -- $27 including shipping and handling.

Who needs an automatic anything you can't trust?

What if Thanksgiving arrived, and I was desperate to open that can of cranberry sauce? What if I had a terrible cold, and I couldn't open chicken soup?

You'll probably sneer, "It's your own fault. Why can't you cook from scratch? Why must you turn to cans?"

Oh sure, blame the victim.

But I blame One Touch.

This automatic can opener is a tease.

And nobody likes a tease.

Veteran journalist Lisa Kaplan Gordon has never met a gadget she didn't want to try. She reviews As Seen on TV products for Consumer Ally on

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