Rental Roommate Nightmares: Drunk Stoners, Old Guy Wants a Lad, and Red Flags Galore!

Nothing can be worse than a nightmare roommate situation. Imagine your personal space invaded by pure creepiness. However, due to to the allure of cheap rent we are sometimes forced into roommate slavery.

Today we have a drunk stoner, an old guy who wants a young lad, and perhaps one of our biggest red flag ads of all time.

Read on to find out the full details on these and more....

San Francisco
7 member Co-operative house seeks you!
We share shopping and cleaning responsibilities on a weekly and monthly basis.
We take turns talking and listening.
We do not have separate dishes for meat & veggie stuffs.
We are 420 friendly, but ask that you keep it in your room. People drink alcohol here, but no other hard drugs.
*We are NOT looking for a constant party. If you want to have your bros over every night for party time, this is not the place for you.
*Sorry, no pets!
*If you wear heavy perfume or cologne or other heavy scents, this is not the right house for you.

Our Take: We are members of a cult. We wear matching Nike tennis shoes. We sleep in bunk beds and drink the same-tasting Kool-Aid.

Smoker, drinker, stoner. Very sexual and active sex pot. Been around most all the blocks. Always on the hunt for a cool girl pal who is enlightened and sexually enlightened. I have a room to rent. It's a funky but cool set-up, tight quarters; a studio with an extra bedroom; it's like living on a boat. It's fun and funky. Very popular hang. I keep very late hours; work from home. It's a smoking environment and comes with a cool Kitty. I am mildly entertaining and mucho easy/fun Interested?

Our Take: So basically your drinking stoner new roommate who keeps late hours and works from home, will be around 24/7 in your tight quarters. But don't worry: he'll be too drunk and stoned to notice.

Los Angeles older guy wants to hang out with lad
I'm not into sex, but I like normal guys to take care of one. If you need a situation... Prefer 18 straight
I'm really nice and fair and we can help each other

Our Take: This sounds like a throwback to the days of pirates where an older gent could help out a young lad and make him his cabin boy. Shiver me timbers! Aaaargh!

New York $150 Master Bedroom
This room is being rented to ladies only.

Now,just because I'm renting a room out to you,doesn't mean that you run the joint.

I don't want your raggedy nigga walking around,looking thru my shit.

I have some of my prize possessions here.

Of course,your bestfriend can come thru,and you gotta get your sex on,

but I don't want no niggas spending the night.(F*CK THAT)

The party is over at 12.But your girlfriends can chill,if I like them..(LOL)

You don't have to have a job or need check stubs.You just gotta be able to get money..(Feel me)

P.S.It's ok if you puff trees and cigarettes,but no f*ckin crack/dope track arm,crystal meth teeth having,prostitutes.
I'm sorry for being so strict,but your going to be quiet comfortble for $150.

Our Take: Quick pop quiz. A crisp $20 bill to the person who can spot the most red flags in this ad.

For more to keep you up at night, read other Rental Roommate Nightmare editions.

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