Twitter goes down. Productivity soars!


It was a busy morning around America today, with companies reporting a surge in productivity starting at around 9:00 AM EST. Office managers are puzzled. One reported that, "It was almost as if a switch had been flipped and all of the sudden TPS reports were being generated, phones began ringing and even interns were getting coffee faster!" The sudden increase in productivity has some economists wondering if it a sign of the end of the current economic crisis.

Thus far, the only event that is being pointed to as the cause for this upswing is a Twitter outage which apparently started a few minutes before the productivity boost began. While the exact cause of the outage is unknown, its effects extend far beyond productivity.

AT&T is enjoying a brief break from negative publicity over network performance issues, with stock prices up five points this morning. Analysts are unsure if it is due to the inability of users to share their complaints or if the Twitter outage has reduced network strain significantly.