Eight's not enough: Octomom moves to trademark the 'Octo' name

Nadya Suleman, that delightful pixie of fertility who has danced merrily into our hearts and won't leave, has used a California law firm to file two applications to trademark her nickname with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. If they go through, she'll be able to manufacture Octomom diapers, Octomom dresses, Octomom pants -- basically, stuff to take care of children better than her own brood of 14 is alleged to be.

The filing cost her $825, but if it works out, it could make her many times that. But I think she's barking up the wrong tree. I don't know a person in America who associates Nadya Suleman with good mothering, so I can't see Octomom Baby Formula flying off any shelves, unless people are inspired by her ability to milk things dry. No, Suleman could use the trademark for something more suited to her peculiar notoriety, though. How about Octomom brand collagen, for scandal-stung lips, or Octomom brand fake eyelashes, made for incredulously batting at TV cameras when someone accuses you of irresponsible parenting?