Honey, they shrank the consumer! Smaller packages make you feel small.

A subtle yet slightly disturbing trend is overtaking the American consumer: We are being downsized without our consent.

Manufacturers of consumer staples, in efforts to prop up their sagging profit margins, are selling us smaller portions of puffed up or watered down formulas under cover of the same old same old. It's not particularly surprising, and not especially detestable, but when it's done in a manner which indicates that the offending companies are hoping that their loyal patrons are just plain stupid, that's what really ticks me off.

For instance, one of the few luxuries which I still allow myself, is a good hot shower a couple times a week. In ages past, I'd shower daily, but that was in a simpler time before liberal globalism labeled me as a guilt worthy, American consumerist pig. In any case, recently I allowed myself a special holiday scrub-down, and I encountered a rude surprise when getting myself a fresh bar of soap.

I grabbed the package of Dial Gold Soap bars, which my wife had recently purchased. The odd thing that I noticed was that the soap bars were each nicely nestled in their own individual boxes.This is definitely something new for my favorite soap. I quickly realized the significance of the new packaging. I ripped open one of the little boxes, and out slid my favorite soap - in a size which must be about 20% smaller than any Dial Gold soap bar which I have ever had the pleasure to have known.