Somebody's gotta demand it: a Bill of Rights for TV Commercial Viewers

Maybe it's the current headlines, or too much caffeine, but at this moment, I'm cranky. Sure, I could be up in arms about our economy, or global warming or something important, but darn it, it's Friday, and it seems like a good day to complain about something kind of trivial.

Here's my thinking: After all these years of making TV commercials and subjecting the public to them, Madison Avenue or the government should put some rules in place, some guidelines designed to make television ads more pleasurable to watch. And so if I ruled the world for a day, besides getting rid of gravity and making pie a health food, here are the advertising rules I would enforce out there in television land.