CPSC recalling tainted hillbilly teeth

Just in case you were thinking about stuffing your mouth with anything Chinese that isn't General Tso's chicken -- Don't! Funtastic, a Texas-based novelty company, might have to re-brand itself under the name "Leadtastic," after it began to recall 26,000 fake hillbilly teeth that were manufactured in China.

I love how the packaging to the right works as both a sales pitch and a warning. Luckily these teeth are easily identifiable, just look for brown gums, yellow-colored teeth and a packaging number of 2657. Sorry, I don't think you can turn in Uncle Bubba's teeth as part of the recall effort.

I'm sure you have seen loads of darling children running around with a gob of misshapen plastic teeth in their mouths acting out scenes from Deliverance, but the fun has to end now. It seems lead in toys is an issue mainly because children might put them in their mouths and suffer from lead poisoning. You could argue that some items such as board games and piggy banks can contain as much lead as low-cost producers see fit since kids aren't likely to shove those items into their mouths. (Not that they won't try anyway). Somehow Funtastic missed this memo and for the last three years has been shipping lead-filled toys which are meant to be jammed into your kid's mouth.

You can get a refund on your lead dentures by contacting LeadtasticFuntastic.