Worst toy ever -- Airport security x-ray machine


I suppose in an era when every kid owns a boxcar's worth of toys, finding new ideas for play time toys is a challenge. However, I have to believe that we can do better than Wizard Industries' pathetic new offering, the Scan-it Operation Checkpoint Toy X-Ray Machine.

Hey, let's play airport security checkpoint! You be the business passenger standing in a line stretching to the equator forlornly watching your flight home take off without you. I'll play the checkpoint guard, demanding, in a language vaguely similar to English, that you strip to the buff while I unpack your bag to make sure everyone in the airport gets a good look at your dirty underwear. Yeah, that would be, like, SO much fun!

If this sells, I can imagine a whole line of new toys based on egregious situations. How about play equipment for-

  • Baby's first breathalyzer, complete with plea-bargaining attorney doll?

  • Playtime plumbing disaster, including your own miniature toilet, wadded paper and plastic turds, a play plunger and silly snake?

  • Let's play Performance Review, with an "improvement needed" stamp, a pay raise spinner, and exit interview questionnaire?

  • Daddy's first heart attack, complete with a small snow shovel, and fake snow, scissors to rip open a shirt, a crash cart (D cells extra) and a chaplain doll?

  • The complete play OB-GYN exam kit?

Yeah, that's my idea of play.