Gifts with an edge: Gummy tapeworms

As the holiday season approaches, we thought you might appreciate some gift suggestions with a twist, appropriate for those on your list who aren't satisfied with the same old, same old.

Curse your foodie friends. They're never satisfied. No, not with the inferior wine you gave them last year, nor with Harry & David Fruit-of-the-Month selection you gifted them with the year prior. And that cost good money.

Perhaps it's time to accept that you'll never be able to please them, so why try? Demonstrate your newfound freedom from the prison of their opinion by gifting them with something that makes no pretense of currying favor. And what would say *kiss my ***" this Holiday season better than a Gummy Tapeworm?

The Gummy Tapeworm comes in that most unpleasant of artificial flavors, green apple. And since no one except Maria Callas (who once ate a tapeworm as a diet aid) knows what tapeworms taste like, who could criticize the flavor?

Oh, right-- your ever-critical friend could.

No matter. You've made your point. Now smile and walk away, reminding yourself that 'tis always better to give than to receive. (Especially in this case...)