The 10 Unexpected ADHD Signs Most People Miss, According to Psychologists

Shelby Deering

Picture this. Over the years, you’ve been to multiple mental health professionals as you try to arrive at a diagnosis, presenting a set of symptoms that can be seen among several disorders, like anxiety, irritability and mood swings. You’ve always been a great student, and as an adult, you’re pretty organized and on top of things. So, it couldn’t be ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder)…right?

While everyone’s experience is different, this story rings true for many people diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. And it’s not usually the fault of mental health professionals—ADHD can be a classically difficult disorder to diagnose, since its signs can be subtle and can mimic other mental health conditions. In fact, many everyday things we tend to brush off can actually be signs of ADHD in disguise.

ADHD is defined as a neurodevelopmental disorder that is chronic and can affect one’s behavior and mood. And while some symptoms are characteristic of ADHD, like inattentiveness, forgetfulness and fidgeting, others can be unexpected and fly under the radar.

As CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) reports, adults aged 18 to 44 show a 4.4 percent prevalence of ADHD. But take into account that all too frequently, ADHD is missed—particularly in adult women. Since women excel at “masking,” or covering up their symptoms, their ADHD can be misdiagnosed as generalized anxiety or another disorder.

We asked two psychologists to share the top ADHD signs that people typically miss.

What Is Adult ADHD?

While, to some, it seems as if ADHD is only diagnosed among children, it’s also found among adults. Adult ADHD is termed as the diagnosis of ADHD in someone older than 18, as Dr. Kevin Antshel, Ph.D, a licensed psychologist specializing in ADHD and Professor of Psychology at Syracuse University, says. He states that while many adults with ADHD were diagnosed as children or adolescents, it is possible that an adult may be diagnosed for the first time in adulthood.

“People may not have had access to diagnostic resources in childhood or symptoms may not have been as apparent,” says Dr. Nicole Hayes, Ph.D.,  a licensed clinical psychologist and private practice psychologist specializing in ADHD and eating disorders.

Dr. Antshel adds that additional reasons can include milder symptoms, having a high IQ and being raised in an environment that reduces the impact of the ADHD symptoms (i.e., a parent who provides considerable structure).

“In my practice, I see a lot of college kids and young adults getting diagnosed,” Dr. Hayes says. “I think for these people, they had previously been able to rely on being smart or things being easy enough that their attention deficits didn’t feel so bad. Once they get to upper divisions in college or their first jobs, they suddenly realize that the things that were working for them before have stopped working.”

Dr. Hayes also says that she’s seen a fair number of mothers get diagnosed when their kids are young and are seeing similar traits in their newly ADHD-diagnosed child.

Related: Here Are 10 Signs That You Might Have Adult ADHD, According to Experts

Why Are Signs of ADHD Easy To Miss?

Dr. Antshel points out that symptoms of ADHD aren’t specific to ADHD—making it difficult to diagnose at times.

“For example, distractibility is an ADHD symptom, yet it also occurs in adults who do not have ADHD," he says. "Likewise, restlessness is an ADHD symptom that also occurs in adults who are anxious. Due to this non-specificity, it is possible for adults to miss signs of ADHD or misattribute the symptoms to something else.”

ADHD symptoms are associated with multiple other conditions that are not ADHD—such as anxiety, depression and substance abuse.

Dr. Hayes says that adults who unknowingly have ADHD have to develop “a whole bunch of skills” to balance out things that were hard for them.

“These skills may mask the symptoms,” she says. “Also, because someone has been compensating for their ADHD for many years, they may not realize that they are using skills at all, and instead think of everything they are doing as ‘normal.’”

“In childhood, a parent or a teacher usually points out symptoms,” Dr. Hayes says. “In adulthood, someone has to see these things in themselves in order to seek a diagnosis.”

Related: 10 Doctor-Approved Natural Remedies for Adult ADHD, Because Medication Is Only Half the Battle

10 Commonly Missed ADHD Signs, According to Psychologists

1. Addiction to devices

Dr. Antshel says that excessive use of the Internet, video games or social media (that can cross the line into addiction) can result in “withdrawal symptoms” in the absence of those things. This can oftentimes be a hallmark of those with ADHD.

2. Difficulty with time management

Describing it as “the feeling of time moving faster than it really is,” Dr. Antshel says that those with ADHD can struggle with “poor time estimation” and “time management.”

Dr. Hayes agrees with this concept, saying that people with ADHD tend to overschedule their time. She says that this is characterized by “planning more errands, or fun things than there is time in the day and not realizing there isn’t time to do all the things.”

3. Experiencing driving mishaps

Are you prone to getting frequent speeding tickets and parking tickets or have you gotten into plenty of minor fender-benders? These could be signs of ADHD.

“Driving takes a lot of attention on multiple things all at the same time,” Dr. Hayes says. “Minor lapses in attention can mean that you’re going faster than you meant to or that the car in front of you has slowed down without you realizing it.”

4. Inability to wait

For those with ADHD, waiting is hard. Specifically, waiting in line can make you angry. Very angry.

“Waiting in lines makes you angrier than your peers,” says Dr. Antshel. “Impatience and the need for immediate gratification is strong and leads to more frustration than others report.”

Dr. Hayes says that this impatience can also be seen in getting up from the table as soon as you’ve finished a meal.

“People with ADHD unconsciously classify this as ‘unnecessary waiting’ and want to move onto the next thing as soon as possible,” she says. “For them, luxuriating at the dining table isn’t a fun way to spend their time.”

5. Avoiding challenging tasks

Dr. Antshel says that avoidance of tasks that require sustained attention can lead to multiple “piles” in your home that can include bills and junk mail. Email clutter can also be overwhelming.

6. Struggling with eating and cooking

Additionally, ADHD can show up as difficulty with planning and eating meals.

“This can look like forgetting to eat, starting cooking and getting distracted halfway through, burning food or sticking to the same few meals,” Dr. Antshel observes.

7. Leaving projects unfinished

Dr. Antshel says that individuals with ADHD tend to think that they’re better at multitasking than they really are, and they think they can handle multiple projects simultaneously.

But often, this can result in multiple, half-completed projects, which can begin to create stress and frustration.

Related: Here’s Why Adderall Is in Short Supply Right Now—and What To Do if You’re Affected

8. Having low self-esteem

Unfortunately, people with ADHD can struggle with self-esteem issues.

“People with ADHD don’t naturally have lower self-esteem, but the issues ADHD can cause in their lives can be internalized to a personal problem,” Dr. Hayes explains. “People with ADHD may judge themselves because things are harder for them than people around them. They may also judge themselves for getting overwhelmed by ‘normal, simple’ tasks and start to view themselves as lazy and incompetent.”

9. Being hypersensitive to certain things

The last time you went to the grocery store, were you bothered and overwhelmed by the fluorescent lights, crowds of people, and loud music and announcements? This can be termed as hypersensitivity to certain stimuli, as Dr. Hayes says.

“People without ADHD can block out unwanted or disliked stimuli much easier than people with ADHD,” she says. “If something bothers someone with ADHD, it can bother them strongly and last until that thing goes away. Issues like smells, textures and sounds can feel stronger.”

10. Seeing little improvement with other diagnosed disorders

Does this sound like you? Dr. Antshel says, “You have been treated for a mood disorder for years, but have seen little improvement.” He adds that around one in three adults with treatment-resistant depression meets the criteria for ADHD.

How Can Those With ADHD Improve Their Daily Lives?

If many of these signs are ringing a bell with you, it could be time to visit a psychologist or psychiatrist, or your primary care doctor who can provide a referral. They can take you through a proper assessment to determine if you may possibly have ADHD.

Although ADHD sounds like it can make your daily life challenging and complicated, there are treatments and coping mechanisms you can turn to.

Dr. Antshel recommends several things that can improve functioning, such as physical activity, sleeping eight to nine hours per night, having a consistent sleep/wake routine (going to bed at the same time and getting up at the same time each day), eating a protein-rich breakfast every day, limiting screen time (especially at night), using a planner, breaking large tasks down into more manageable units and practicing self-compassion.

On that note, Dr. Hayes says that it’s key to be gentle with yourself and slow down.

“If you’re struggling with something ADHD-related, it isn’t because you are lazy or bad at things,” she shares. “Try to remember that these challenges are because your brain is working differently from someone else’s brain.”

She also suggests developing specific strategies that can make life easier. For example, to be more on time, you can set alarms to remind yourself to leave on time, or set a series of reminders for each step of getting ready to give yourself a more accurate picture of how long things will take.

“Recruiting friends and family as well can be helpful,” she says.

As for treatment approaches, Dr. Antshel recommends “a multimodal treatment,” which includes the use of medication as well as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).

“There are multiple stimulants and several non-stimulant medications that are FDA-approved for treating ADHD in adults,” he says. “And multiple CBT programs have been developed for adults with ADHD and have research support.”

Dr. Hayes adds that working with a psychologist can also help with the self-esteem portion of ADHD by using CBT strategies to reframe automatic negative thoughts about yourself.

“Medication can help with focus, but using strategies from therapy can help direct that focus,” she says.

Dr. Hayes says that it’s important to keep in mind that attention is a spectrum, and the world isn’t broken up into people with ADHD and people who have great attention.

“If you notice yourself struggling to pay attention or focus, it doesn't always mean you have ADHD,” she says. “Keep track of the things that are bothering you and work on developing skills to balance out these difficulties. If you still think you have ADHD, seek an assessment from a licensed psychologist.”

Next up, find out if online ADHD tests are legit.

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