Derrick Rose's alleged victim speaks out: 'I didn't want to feel like I was weak'

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Last summer a former girlfriend of NBA star Derrick Rose, who then played for the Chicago Bulls, accused him of gang rape. According to the suit, she dated Rose on and off for two years, and at the end of their relationship Rose invited her to a party at his Beverly Hills home. She said she was drugged at the party and left with a friend — later that night Rose and his friends allegedly broke into her apartment and raped her.

Although she's chosen to remain anonymous — the possibility of having her identity revealed is part of the reason she filed the case two years after the fact, she said — she spoke to ThinkProgress at length about her life before she was raped, her decision to file the lawsuit, and the repercussions.

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She has good memories of her relationship with Rose, she said, and they would see each other fairly often while he lived in Los Angeles. But once he moved to Chicago, things changed. "If he would Skype me later in the day, that's when he would pressure me to either do stuff like take my clothes off or show myself on camera without my clothing and just touch myself, just do stuff to myself, and that was very uncomfortable for me," she said. "I said my phone wasn't working and my computer wasn't working. That was a lie."

They stopped talking, but she eventually reached out to him for closure. That's when he invited her to the party. "I felt that night was going to be the night where I'd know, okay, we're not going to be together going forward, or we're just going to remain friends," she said. But she began to black out soon after arriving.

It took her a while to piece together what had happened. And once she had, she didn't want to believe it. "I didn't want to feel like I was weak and like I was the victim and like my body failed me," she said. "I didn't want to feel like that person. And I never was  —  I was the total opposite of that. I couldn't even believe that was what had happened."

She's back in school, but she told ThinkProgress she suffers from anxiety and her self-confidence has taken a hit:

She went on, "How do you prevent any girl from being raped, any girl from being blacked out? I never thought about before because I really believed that if you were living correctly that those kind of things didn't happen to you."

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Chicago Bulls' Derrick Rose in action during an NBA basketball game against the Philadelphia 76ers, Monday, Nov. 9, 2015, in Philadelphia. (AP Photo/Matt Slocum)
CHICAGO, IL - NOVEMBER 16: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls looks on during the game against the Indiana Pacers on November 16, 2015 at the United Center in Chicago, Illinois. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2015 NBAE (Photo by Gary Dineen/NBAE via Getty Images)
CHICAGO, IL - MAY 14: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls drives against Matthew Dellavedova #8 of the Cleveland Cavaliers in the third quarter during Game Six of the Eastern Conference Semifinals of the 2015 NBA Playoffs at United Center on May 14, 2015 in Chicago, Illinois. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - OCTOBER 29: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls warms-up prior to the game against the Miami Heat on October 29, 2013 at AmericanAirlines Arena in Miami, Florida. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images)
CLEVELAND, OH - MAY 12: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls pauses on the court in the second half against the Cleveland Cavaliers during Game Five in the Eastern Conference Semifinals of the 2015 NBA Playoffs 2015 at Quicken Loans Arena on May 12, 2015 in Cleveland, Ohio. The Cavaliers defeated the Bulls 106-101. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Jason Miller/Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - FEBRUARY 23: Guard Derrick Rose of the Chicago Bulls watches from the bench against the Miami Heat at AmericanAirlines Arena on February 23, 2014 in Miami, Florida.The Heat defeated the Bulls 93-79. NOTE TO USER: User Expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images Liscense Agreement. (Photo by Marc Serota/Getty Images)
LAS VEGAS, NV - JULY 27: Derrick Rose #41 of the USA Basketball Men's National Team poses for a headshot at the Wynn Las Vegas on July 27, 2014 in Las Vegas, Nevada. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2014 NBAE (Photo by Andrew D. Bernstein/NBAE via Getty Images)
CHICAGO, IL - FEBRUARY 11: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls, who suffered a season-ending knee injury in November, practices his shooting before the Bulls take on the Atlanta Hawks at the United Center on February 11, 2014 in Chicago, Illinois. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
PORTLAND, OR - NOVEMBER 22: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls shoots the ball during the game against the Portland Trail Blazers on November 22, 2013 at the Moda Center Arena in Portland, Oregon. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Sam Forencich/NBAE via Getty Images)
PORTLAND, OR - NOVEMBER 22: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls drives to the basket against the Portland Trail Blazers on November 22, 2013 at the Moda Center Arena in Portland, Oregon. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Sam Forencich/NBAE via Getty Images)
DENVER, CO - NOVEMBER 21: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls in action of the Denver Nuggets at Pepsi Center on November 21, 2013 in Denver, Colorado. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images)
Derrick Rose of the Chicago Bulls gingerly walks to the bench during a time out in an NBA game against the Cleveland Cavaliers during the 4th quarter at the United Center in Chicago on Monday, Nov. 11, 2013. The Bulls won, 96-81. (Scott Strazzante/Chicago Tribune/MCT via Getty Images)
INDIANAPOLIS - NOVEMBER 6: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls looks on before the game against the Indiana Pacers at Bankers Life Fieldhouse on November 6, 2013 in Indianapolis, Indiana. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and condition of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: 2013 NBAE (Photo by Ron Hoskins/NBAE via Getty Images)
CHICAGO, IL - OCTOBER 31: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls prepares to shoot a free throw against the New York Knicks at the United Center on October 31, 2013 in Chicago, Illinois. The Bulls defeated the Knicks 82-81. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - OCTOBER 29: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls warms-up against the Miami Heat on October 29, 2013 at American Airlines Arena in Miami, Florida. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - OCTOBER 29: Derrick Rose #1 and Luol Deng #9 of the Chicago Bulls speak with eachother against the Miami Heat on October 29, 2013 at AmericanAirlines Arena in Miami, Florida. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - OCTOBER 29: Derrick Rose #1 and Carlos Boozer #5 of the Chicago Bulls and LeBron James #6 of the Miami Heat walk up the floor during a game at American Airlines Arena on October 29, 2013 in Miami, Florida. (Photo by Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images)
MIAMI, FL - OCTOBER 29: Derrick Rose #1 of the Chicago Bulls warms-up prior to the game against the Miami Heat on October 29, 2013 at AmericanAirlines Arena in Miami, Florida. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this photograph, User is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2013 NBAE (Photo by Joe Murphy/NBAE via Getty Images)
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