Michelle Williams says raising daughter Matilda without Heath Ledger 'won't ever be right'

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Michelle Williams admits that her life at 36 isn't what she imagined.

In an interview with the December issue of Porter magazine, the actress opens up about raising her daughter, Matilda, without Heath Ledger, who died in January 2008 when his daughter was just 2 years old. "In all honesty, for pretty much everything else, I feel like I'm a believer in not fighting circumstances, accepting where you are and where you've been. In pretty much all senses but one," Williams explains. "I would be able to go totally down that line of thinking were it not for Matilda not having her dad. You know, that's just something that doesn't... I mean, it just won't ever be right."

PORTER magazine

The Manchester By the Sea star adds that being a single mother is a constant challenge. "Talk about a learning process. I think, God, what would I say about it?" she says. "I feel really sensitive about it and certainly did not expect to still be dating at 36 with an 11-year-old."

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See photos of Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams together:

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Heath Ledger, Michelle Williams, Matilda
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Heath Ledger, Michelle Williams, Matilda
Australian actor Heath Ledger, nominated for best actor in a drama for his work in "Brokeback Mountain," left, arrives with actress Michelle Williams for the 63rd Annual Golden Globe Awards on Monday, Jan. 16, 2006, in Beverly Hills, Calif. (AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)
Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams at the "Vanity Fair" OscarS Party. (West Hollywood, CA)
NEW YORK - JANUARY 23: Names and foot imprints of Heath Ledgers and Michelle WIlliams's baby Matilda, and of family dog Hugo are seen in front of the house where Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams lived together on January 23, 2008 in the Brooklyn borough, New York City. Ledger, died January 22, 2008 at the age of 28. (Photoby Brad Barket/Getty Images)
NEW YORK - OCTOBER 27: (L-R) Matilda Ledger and Michelle Williams are seen on October 27, 2009 in the Brooklyn borough of New York City. (Photo by Christopher Peterson/BuzzFoto/FilmMagic)
BROOKLYN - MAY 23: (L-R) Michelle Williams and Matilda Ledger sighting on May 23, 2009 in Brooklyn, New York. (Photo by Christopher Peterson/BuzzFoto/FilmMagic)
NEW YORK - OCTOBER 27: (L-R) Matilda Ledger and Michelle Williams are seen on October 27, 2009 in the Brooklyn borough of New York City. (Photo by Christopher Peterson/BuzzFoto/FilmMagic)
Heath Ledger, nominated for best actor for his work in "Brokeback Mountain," left, arrives with his fiance Michelle Williams, nominated for best supporting actress for her work in the film, at the 25th annual nominees luncheon hosted by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences in Beverly Hills, Calif., Monday, Feb. 13, 2006. Oscar nominees attended the function in anticipation of the Academy Awards scheduled for March 5. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)
"Brokeback Mountain" cast members Heath Ledger, nominated for outstanding performance by a male actor in a leading role and girlfriend, Michelle Williams, nominated for a female actor in a supporting role arrive for the 12th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards Sunday, Jan. 29, 2006, in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Kevork Djansezian)
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA - JANUARY 22: Actor Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams attend the Australian Premier of Brokeback mountain at the Cinema Paris on the 13 January 2006 in Sydney, Australia. The Australian actor was found dead on his hotel floor in New York on January 22, 2008. (Photo by Mike Flokis/Getty Images)
Michelle Williams, nominee Best Female Lead for Land of Plenty, and Heath Ledger (Photo by Ron Galella, Ltd./WireImage)
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Williams also recalls some tough love she received from her longtime friend and former Dawson's Creek co-star, Busy Phillips, in regard to her dating life. "My friend Busy and her husband Marc [Silverstein] said, 'Michelle, you're in like a blackout zone, everybody is now partnered up and you have to wait for people to start getting divorced.' Oh my f--king God. Are you kidding me?" she exclaims. "I'm just sitting around and waiting for marriages to crumble? Oh wow! No!"

PORTER magazine

WATCH: WATCH: Heath Ledger's Sister Praises Michelle Williams for Giving Daughter Matilda a 'Normal' Life


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