Anna Duggar tearfully addresses Josh's 'betrayal': 'My only hope was to cling to my faith'

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Anna Duggar Speaks Out on Josh Duggar's 'Betrayal'


Anna Duggar is trying to keep it together.

The reality star has grown more reclusive in the wake of husband Josh Duggar's molestation and infidelity scandal, and on this week's Jill and Jessa: Counting On, she emotionally addresses how Josh's actions have affected their marriage.

"How could this happen in our marriage?" the 27-year-old wonders aloud. "Josh is my first love, he's my one and only."

"I didn't know what to do, I knew we needed help," she adds. "My only hope was to cling to my faith... If I went off of what I was feeling, I would turn a mess into a disaster."

"It was such a betrayal for a spouse to go through what we're walking through," Anna says. "It was a betrayal for those that call themselves Christian. To vow before God to be loyal to each other, and that loyalty was broken."

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5/22 - Josh Duggar - molestation charges
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Anna Duggar tearfully addresses Josh's 'betrayal': 'My only hope was to cling to my faith'
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Josh Duggar visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NATIONAL HARBOR, MD - FEBRUARY 28: Anna Duggar and Josh Duggar pose during the 42nd annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) at the Gaylord National Resort Hotel and Convention Center on February 28, 2015 in National Harbor, Maryland. Conservative activists attended the annual political conference to discuss their agenda. (Photo by Kris Connor/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Hilaria Baldwin (R) interviews Josh Duggar and his daughter during their visit with 'Extra' in Times Square on March 11, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NATIONAL HARBOR, MD - FEBRUARY 28: Josh Duggar speaks during the 42nd annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) at the Gaylord National Resort Hotel and Convention Center on February 28, 2015 in National Harbor, Maryland. Conservative activists attended the annual political conference to discuss their agenda. (Photo by Kris Connor/Getty Images)
NATIONAL HARBOR, MD - FEBRUARY 28: Anna Duggar and Josh Duggar pose during the 42nd annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) at the Gaylord National Resort Hotel and Convention Center on February 28, 2015 in National Harbor, Maryland. Conservative activists attended the annual political conference to discuss their agenda. (Photo by Kris Connor/Getty Images)
Josh Duggar, executive director of FRC Action, speaks in favor the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act at the Arkansas state Capitol in Little Rock, Ark., Friday, Aug. 29, 2014. (AP Photo/Danny Johnston)
18 of the 19 members of the Duggar family pose for a photo at Northwest Arkansas Regional Airport in Highfil, Ark. on Friday, May 9, 2008, after returning from a trip to New York where the announced that they are expecting their 18th child. This weekend, Duggar will join her husband and their 17 children to celebrate Mother's Day with brunch at a hotel in downtown Little Rock. Their youngest child, Jennifer, is 9 months old. Their oldest, Josh, is 20. The Duggar children include 10 boys and seven girls. Within the group are two sets of twins. (AP Photo/Beth Hall)
In this Aug. 2, 2007 file photo, Michelle Duggar, left, is surrounded by her children and husband Jim Bob, second from left, after the birth of her 17th child in Rogers, Ark. Michelle Duggar gave birth to her 18th child, a girl named Jordyn-Grace Makiya Duggar, Thursday, Dec. 18, 2008. (AP Photo/ Beth Hall, File)
NATIONAL HARBOR, MD - FEBRUARY 28: Anna Duggar and Josh Duggar pose during the 42nd annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) at the Gaylord National Resort Hotel and Convention Center on February 28, 2015 in National Harbor, Maryland. Conservative activists attended the annual political conference to discuss their agenda. (Photo by Kris Connor/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Hilaria Baldwin (R) interviews Josh Duggar and his daughter during their visit with 'Extra' in Times Square on March 11, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
Republican presidential candidate, former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum, right, puts a cheese head hat on his friend Josh Duggar during their visit to Simon's Specialty Cheese in Appleton, Wis., Monday, April 2, 2012. (AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)
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WATCH: 7 Revealing Things We Learned From TLC's New Duggar Special 'Jill & Jessa: Counting On'

Last week, a source told ET that despite all the problems in their marriage, Anna and Josh have been writing love letters to each other, as the disgraced 27-year-old completes a faith-based rehabilitation program in Rockford, Illinois.

"Anna is planning on getting back together with Josh, that's just how it goes," the source said. "The family was taught to have a new level of forgiveness towards Josh."

WATCH: Anna and Josh Duggar Are Writing Love Letters to Each Other, Source Says

On the three-part TLC special, several members of the Duggar family have tearfully shared what Josh's multiple scandals have done to the family.

"Just thinking about what Josh has been speaking for, and how our family believes as a whole, that what makes it so unbelievable," Josh's sister, Jill, explained during last week's premiere. "It wasn't right for him to let us [defend him] without having the full knowledge of what he was hiding."

WATCH: Duggar Family in Turmoil Over Jill and Jessa's TLC Special: It's 'Turning Into a Circus,' Says Source

The cheating scandal hit particularly hard after Jessa Duggar revealed that the family had already spent years learning to trust 27-year-old Josh again, who, in May, admitted he had molested five minor girls as a teen, including four of his sisters.

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Duggar family
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Anna Duggar tearfully addresses Josh's 'betrayal': 'My only hope was to cling to my faith'
TODAY -- Pictured: (l-r) Michelle Duggar and Jim Bob Duggar appear on NBC News' 'Today' show (Photo by Peter Kramer/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: AJ Calloway (C) poses with (L-R) Jessa Duggar, Jinger Duggar, Jill Duggar, and Jana Duggar during their visit to 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
TODAY -- Pictured: (l-r) Michelle Duggar, Jim Bob Duggar and Kate Upton appear on NBC News' 'Today' show (Photo by Peter Kramer/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
TODAY -- Pictured: (l-r) James Duggar, Michelle Duggar and Matt Lauer appear on NBC News' 'Today' show (Photo by Peter Kramer/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Josh Duggar visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: (R-L) AJ Calloway and Hilaria Baldwin interview Josh Duggar and his daughter during their visit with 'Extra' in Times Square on March 11, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Hilaria Baldwin (R) interviews Josh Duggar and his daughter during their visit with 'Extra' in Times Square on March 11, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
Two weeks ago I married my best friend! 😘 I love you, Darling! @ben_seewald
It's great living life with your best friend! @ben_seewald
We're expecting!!! So grateful to God for this new little blessing!!! #babydilly #firsttimeparents #sogratefultoGod #derickdillard #jillmdillard
We enjoyed a wonderful family dinner at the Bradford Inn! #familyvacation2014 #19kids #branson
Met Duck Dynasty's Allen & Lisa Robertson tonight!
WASHINGTON, DC - FEBRUARY 10: A view of the book 'A Love That Multiplies' during the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) at the Marriott Wardman Park on February 10, 2012 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Kris Connor/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 23: Jill Duggar Dillard (L) and husband Derick Dillard visit 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on October 23, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 23: (L-R) AJ Calloway interviews Jill Duggar Dillard and husband Derick Dillard during their visit to 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on October 23, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
FILE - In this March 14, 2014 file photo, Rev. Mark Harris, right, who is seeking a Republican U.S. Senate nomination in the upcoming North Carolina primary, is supported during a campaign event by Jim Bob Duggar, left, and his wife, Michelle Duggar, center, in Raleigh, N.C. The Duggars have 19 children and star in a reality TV show. (AP Photo/Ted Richardson)
FILE - In this March 14, 2014 file photo, Rev. Mark Harris, left, who is seeking a Republican U.S. Senate nomination in the upcoming North Carolina primary, was supported during a campaign event by Michelle Duggar, kneeling, and Jim Bob Duggar, back right, and many of the Duggar's 19 children, in Raleigh, N.C., The Duggars star in a reality TV show. (AP Photo/Ted Richardson)
In this Aug. 2, 2007 file photo, Michelle Duggar, left, is surrounded by her children and husband Jim Bob, third from right after the birth of her 17th child in Rogers, Ark. The Duggars announced on Friday, May 9, 2008 that they are expecting their 18th child. (AP Photo/ Beth Hall, File)
In this Aug. 2, 2007 file photo, Michelle Duggar, left, is surrounded by her children and husband Jim Bob, tsecond from left, after the birth of her 17th child in Rogers, Ark. The Duggars announced on Friday, May 9, 2008 that they are expecting their 18th child. (AP Photo/ Beth Hall, File)
Jim Bob Duggar, top left, watches as his twin sons, Jedidiah and Jeremiah, both 9, Jordyn-Grace Makiya and mother, Michelle, pose for a photo taken by Josiah, right, 12, on Friday, Dec. 19, 2008, in Rogers, Ark. Jordyn-Grace Makiya is the 18th child born into the Duggar family on Dec. 18, 2008. The cable network TLC broadcasts a weekly show about the Duggars, called "Seventeen and Counting." (AP Photo/Beth Hall)
FILE - In this Dec. 19, 2008 file picture, Michelle Duggar holds her newborn daughter, Jordyn-Grace Makiya in Rogers, Ark. No. 19 caught Michelle Duggar by surprise. The 42-year-old mom of 18 noticed that she wasn't losing weight, even though she and husband Jim Bob were on Weight Watchers, and her youngest child, 8-month-old Jordyn-Grace, was fussing while nursing. In the past, she found a fussy infant meant a change in breast milk that came with pregnancy. (AP Photo/Beth Hall)
Arkansas state Rep. Jim Bob Duggar of Springdale front center, and his wife Michelle, right, lead twelve of their thirteen children to a polling place in Springdale, Ark., in this Tuesday, May 21, 2002 file photo. Duggar was running for the U.S. Senate against incumbant Tim Hutchinson in the republican primary election. Dugger's sons Jason, 2, is pictured left, followed by Josiah, 5. (AP Photo/April L. Brown)
FILE - In a Thursday, Aug. 2, 2007 file photo, Michelle Duggar, left, is surrounded by her children and husband Jim Bob, top left, while she holds her newborn daughter, and 17th child, Jennifer Danielle, in Rogers, Ark. Michelle Duggar, the 42-year-old Arkansas mom of 18 and a soon-to-be grandmother, is pregnant again, she said Tuesday, Sept. 1, 2009. (AP Photo/Beth Hall, File)
Michelle Duggar, left, is surrounded by her children and husband Jim Bob, top left, while she holds her newborn daughter, Jennifer Danielle, Thursday, Aug. 2, 2007 in Rogers, Ark. Jennifer Danielle was born at 10:01 a.m., weighed 8 lbs 8 oz, was 21 inches long, and is the 17th child born to Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar. (AP Photo/Beth Hall)
GOOD MORNING AMERICA - One of America's largest families, the Duggars, talk about their new book on GOOD MORNING AMERICA, 3/11/14, airing on the ABC Television Network. They are pictured in GMA's Social Square with Dan Harris. (Photo by Ida Mae Astute/ABC via Getty Images) DUGGAR FAMILY, DAN HARRIS
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: AJ Calloway (L) interviews the Duggar family during their visit to 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
WOODBRIDGE, VA - OCTOBER 16: Reality telvision celebrities, Jim Bob Duggar, center, and his wife, Michelle Duggar make a stop on their 'Values Bus Tour' outside Heritage Baptist Church on Wednesday October 16, 2013 in Woodbridge, VA. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: The Duggar family visits 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: (L-R) Jessa Duggar, Jinger Duggar, Jill Duggar, and Jana Duggar visit 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: AJ Calloway (L) poses with Jim Bob Duggar (R) and wife Michelle Duggar during their visit to 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: Hilaria Baldwin (R) interviews Josh Duggar and his daughter during their visit with 'Extra' in Times Square on March 11, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
TODAY -- Pictured: The Duggar Family appears on NBC News' 'Today show (Photo by Peter Kramer/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 11: AJ Calloway (L) interviews the Duggar family during their visit to 'Extra' at their New York studios at H&M in Times Square on March 11, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images for Extra)
Michelle Duggar holds her newborn daughter, Jennifer Danielle, who was born at 10:01 a.m. on Thursday, Aug. 2, 2007 in Rogers, Ark. Jennifer Danielle weighed 8 lbs 8 oz, was 21 inches long, and is the 17th child born to Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar. (AP Photo/Beth Hall)
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"It was shocking. You don't expect something like that to happen. It's your older brother. Somebody you love and who you trust," she shared. "So definitely there was a period of time in our family where Josh was not to be trusted. He spent time away from home, getting help."

WATCH: Anna Duggar Speaks Out About Josh Duggar Cheating Scandal for the First Time: It Was 'Heartbreaking'

"Trust isn't instantly rebuilt," Jill added. "You can forgive in your heart, but at the same time it's a journey to rebuild that trust."

The second part of Jill & Jessa: Counting On airs Sunday, Dec. 20 at 8 p.m. on TLC.

'Jill & Jessa: Counting On': Duggar Boys Speak


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