I want to wear makeup but my mom disapproves

Before you go, we thought you'd like these...

By: Advice from a Twenty Something


Photo Credit: Advice from a Twenty Something


QUESTION:
So I just turned 22 and will be graduating college on May 15th... I know. I'm a full pledged adult! :) As bad as it sounds, I've never had a boyfriend or even a date. I don't consider myself to be attractive or confident, but I feel like wearing a little make up and "transforming" myself would help my self-esteem/confidence.... So here is the problem:

So my mom and I have always had a great relationship... My mom is over protective of me to the point where she doesn't even allow me to wear make up! I've never even had a sip of alcohol! It's weird because all my sisters, including my 15 year old sister, use make up. I still live with my parents (I can't afford to pay for both my place and go to college), so I have always felt the need to follow her household rules. As bad as it sounds, I'm my mothers favorite, so I'm constantly trying to live up to her expectations.

How do you suggest I approach this problem. Should I just begin to wear makeup without consulting her? Should I sit down and talk to her?... Last time I mentioned I wanted to wear lipstick, she got mad. I don't want to ruin our relationship, but I don't think I should be deprived of doing something as harmless like wearing makeup... I want to feel free to do what I want. Am I being selfish?


ANSWER:
First of all, YOU ARE SO NOT BEING SELFISH!! Your twenties are an interesting time when you are transitioning from child to adult. Your relationship with your parents is going to begin to change as you realize you are in control of your life. You are an adult, you are your own person, and you can do whatever you want to/for yourself. Yes, you are living under her roof, so perhaps you need to respect anything that affects the household. But the way you dress, where you work, what makeup you wear – these are all things that only affect you and you can do whatever you want!

I think the best way to approach this is to talk to your mom in a mature way. If you want to be an adult, act like one. Express the fact that you are becoming a woman and that, although you love her, respect her, and appreciate all that she does for you, you are working hard to become emotionally independent. This means you will be making your own decisions about what you feel is best for you. This doesn't need to be an angry or confrontational conversation. It can be more of a "thank you for all you've done, you've taught me so much and are a fantastic mother, thank you for preparing me for adulthood – now look at me thrive as my own person". Once you've voiced this, then by all means, start wearing makeup and do as you like. Remind her that this is not in disrespect of her, but rather an expression if your independence and your womanhood. I promise you, she will get used to it over time and learn to accept it.

Do you guys have any advice for her? Have you ever been in a similar situation?

10 starter beauty products every woman should own:

11 PHOTOS
10 beauty products every woman should own
See Gallery
I want to wear makeup but my mom disapproves

Anastasia Brow Pencil

By this time we’ve all seen this quote floating around Instagram or Pinterest, ” Don’t let anyone with bad eyebrows tell you shit about life.” And just like any random Insta quote, truer words have never been spoken. If you want to keep handing out unsolicited advice to every friend, coworker, and hot dog vendor that comes your way, you best get those brows in check.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Bare Minerals Well Rested CC Eye Primer

I’ve been a long time user of this Kiehls’ Facial Fuel Eye De-Puffer but always wished it came in a tinted version. The patron saint of puffy eyes must have been listening because this miracle stick is everything I’ve always wanted. I dab it in the corners of my eyes then cover my under eye area all the way down to my cheekbone. Hello, bright eyes! Wear it alone for a casual weekend day with just mascara or layer it underneath your concealer for extra coverage.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Bare Minerals Well Rested CC Eye Primer

I’ve been a long time user of this Kiehls’ Facial Fuel Eye De-Puffer but always wished it came in a tinted version. The patron saint of puffy eyes must have been listening because this miracle stick is everything I’ve always wanted. I dab it in the corners of my eyes then cover my under eye area all the way down to my cheekbone. Hello, bright eyes! Wear it alone for a casual weekend day with just mascara or layer it underneath your concealer for extra coverage.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Tarte Eyelash Curler

If you don’t have to curl your eyelashes then don’t worry about this little tool, and also I hate you. But, seriously. I’ve been curling my eyelashes since high school and this is the best wand I’ve found to date. The curler is super cushiony and the padding on the handle is divine.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Mary Kay Ultimate Mascara

No, you can’t get this at a local store but like… I’m sure you know at least 72 women that sell this stuff and it’s totally worth it. Lush, full, voluminous – I know all these words mean the same thing but this mascara does everything I’ve ever wanted a mascara to do. It’s ah-mah-zing. I get it in the blackest of black and load it on till I’m bordering on spider lashes JUST KIDDING impossible to do with this wand. Long story short, I die for this mascara. Go get 17 tubes.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

The Lib Scrub in Clementine

My lips are always chapped. So gross right? A little swipe of this stuff in the morning and at night and I no longer want to rip my lips off when I wear a dark lipstick. DS tip: Use this scrub to help take off every last bit of your lipstick!

(Photo: District Sparkle)

M-61 Hydraboost Eye

Best eye gel I’ve ever used and I’ll never use anything else. Period. Morning and night. Invest in this now.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Bumble and Bumble Pret-a-Powder

I originally purchased this little bottle to create additional volume on Day 2 hair days but soon learned it’s actually a dry shampoo. SCORE. It’s advertised as “equal parts dry shampoo, style extender, and volume in a pinch” and it absolutely does every one of those things. Day 2 and 3 hair products now consist of this happy pink bottle and a quick spray of Oribe’s Dry Texturizing Spray.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

M-61 Hydraboost Eye

Best eye gel I’ve ever used and I’ll never use anything else. Period. Morning and night. Invest in this now.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

Clarisonic

After about a year of exfoliating with one of those knock off versions I invested in the classic white Clarisonic brush and could. not. be. more. pleased. This is one of those tools you want to invest in. It doesn’t matter what type of skin you have, this sucker magically makes everything better. Think about all those concealers and creams you’ve used trying to get beautiful, glowing, even toned skin. I’m telling you – start with this puppy and you can toss all those jars out the window.

(Photo: District Sparkle)

of
SEE ALL
BACK TO SLIDE
SHOW CAPTION +
HIDE CAPTION


Here's a video tutorial on super light, natural makeup:
How  to Create a Light, Natural Makeup Look

More from Advice from a Twenty Something:
How To Get Ready In 5 Minutes
3 Ways To Stack Your Rings
How To Make The Most Of Your Spring Dresses
Read Full Story

People are Reading