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Advice columnist puts woman in her place

Advice Columnist Puts Woman In Her Place

If you ask for advice, you have to be prepared to take it -- good, bad or ugly.

That's what one woman is learning after writing to advice columnist Amy Dickinson this week.

Advice seeker, "Sad Sister," wrote about a shopping trip she takes every year. She writes that she always invites her two sisters and cousins, but leaves a third sister out. She writes that the shopping party is made up of church-going, stay-at-home moms, while the third sister is a divorced single mom who doesn't go to church on Sundays.

"We know she doesn't have very much money for such an outing," she writes. "She also does not have many of the same interests as we do. Her life is quite different from ours. We're not interested in what she has to talk about."

"Sad Sister" goes on to explain this makes the left out sister "offended to the point of tears." The writer then asks Amy how to get her sister to, essentially, leave them alone and find other friends.

The advice columnist was having none of it.

"You are a horrible sister," she replied in her column. "Perhaps this is something you could ponder from your church pew because despite your regular attendance, you don't seem to have learned much."

Join the discussion

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m.young38 May 16 2014 at 11:24 PM

Okay I can't resist this one, First of all if the sisters and cousins would include the left out sister more perhaps even splurge a little and offer to pay for a meal here or there for the single mom (who by the way is more parent than either of the others - single parents must do the job of both parents especially in cases where one parent is truly absent and not just living across town.) Instead of condemning the sister as being interested in other interest perhaps if she were included more and made to feel part of the family her load could be eased a little.

To the left out sister, hang in there some day your child will be grown and you can be doubly proud because you did it on your own, just do not be surprised when your child becomes a teen and does not want to associate with your extended family. Children notice even when you do not make a big deal of it. I know mine tell me "Mom I really do not feel bad about that. I saw how you were treated and I just can't care about them

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dmj748 May 16 2014 at 1:42 PM

Ugh, Christianity.

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2 replies
wayne.stone33 dmj748 May 16 2014 at 1:58 PM

The Devil, you say!

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1 reply
dmj748 wayne.stone33 May 16 2014 at 2:15 PM

I was raised Catholic and as an adults, decided religion / of any kind is for me. But when I've been asked and own my truth, most Christians feel it is their place to judge me - and tell me I should be ashamed of myself. Which is ludicrous - people can be decent, charitable people without religion and don't need to be proselytized to. Hence my "ugh Christianity" comment. History has taught me when someone introduces themselves and claims that, to be wary!

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hellyon3too dmj748 May 16 2014 at 2:31 PM

That's not Christianity. It's religiosity.

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villabanca May 16 2014 at 1:43 PM


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onryally May 16 2014 at 1:44 PM

I agree with Amy....she could fit in for the day or weekend if they wanted her to. if they tried. It's not like she has to fit in 24/7...it's a freaking shopping trip, most women love to get together to shop and have lunch and just hang out.

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cliftongop May 16 2014 at 1:45 PM

I am a Christian. I don't curse, I have never had an alcoholic beverage, and I waited for sex until marriage. I met my wife in church. So, I'm a lot like the woman who wrote to Amy, right? Wrong!

If I'm to be a Christian and Christ is to be my model, then I better be willing to associate with sinners. I was the men's shelter supervisor at a rescue mission for 12 years. Drug addicts, ex-cons, alcholics, and a few people that had some rough breaks and no one to care or help them.

There were certainly times that those men needed to be corrected or reprimanded. But even more,then needed someone to care, they needed help, whether it was getting off drugs or writing a resume.

I don't know what's in that woman's heart, and certainly not everyone is called to work with drug addicts. But based on the information in that article, I can't imagine treating a family memember the way she does. As Paul says to the wayward Christians in the city of Corinth, "You did not so learn Christ!"

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joe_larock May 16 2014 at 1:46 PM

There are people who go to church and say that they are Christians, and there are Christians who are doers of the Word, this woman is an arrogant ass who needs to rethink her Faith!

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KWHITEBUFFALOW May 16 2014 at 1:49 PM

At this point if they asked me I would not go. Go find some great freinds instead of your sisters types and go live life with a smile and not a tear.

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phutchp May 16 2014 at 1:49 PM

Too kind to just call her a horrible person, the whole group are horrible people. Self righteous twits? Unfeeling miscreants? ....all horrible. I hope the left out sister sees the column and realizes she may be lucky NOT to be included in this group.

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mmuffits May 16 2014 at 1:56 PM

So Wendy was so hurt by this exclusion that she went to her sister's house in tears and her brother in law threatened to call the police? She must have been close to hysteria with her pain. I am sure Sad Sister feels guilty but still thinks its her sister that just needs to recognize that she is incompatible with this group. Its clear that Wendy would break up the cozy fun dynamics of the group. But I am shocked by the insensitivity and hardness of heart in the face of such obvious need to be included. A mean spirit, indeed.

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Rev Josey Wales May 16 2014 at 1:42 PM

Aren't some religious folks wonderful? Honestly, some make me barf. After studying religion in depth, I found that not one is better than another, most are basically the same. (generalization, I know), and all are simply cults. Bring money Honey. "Bless their hearts"

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1 reply
wayne.stone33 Rev Josey Wales May 16 2014 at 1:56 PM

True religious doctrines cannot be found in the comic books you read. I know that this may disappoint you, but I attend a church where donations are neither required nor asked for. The subject is never addressed.

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