At least 1 in 10 Americans has worked at McDonald's, according to variousestimates. So it's little surprising that when a discussion sparked last week on the anonymous forum Reddit about the "meanest thing a customer has every done to you," the MickeyD tales came rolling in.
It started when Reddit user Bigmac01 claimed that at 1 a.m. that day a customer had thrown a burger at his or her face, because the pickle was "not in the center of the freakin bun." That's not the grossest abuse McDonald's workers purportedly have faced, however.
There was the time a Toledo, Ohiowoman yanked open the drive-thru window to assault the woman duty when she couldn't get her chicken nuggets, and ultimately smashed through the window with her fist. And the time a Philadelphia comedian dressed in a drag tried to trade his Taco Bell "Flydito" for a Big Mac. And then the delightful practice of "cone-ing," which went viral last year: Grabbing your vanilla soft serve by the ice cream as opposed to the cone and startling the server who handed it to you.
But here are some especially sick tales, told by Reddit users who claim to have been McDonald's workers themselves. There's no way to verify their accuracy -- it's an anonymous forum after all -- but given the kind of McDonald's hijinks that make it into the news (a man was just handed a felony charge for throwing a batch of McDonald's french fries at his stepdaughter), these aren't outside the realm of possibility.
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Reddit user revenesis was a shy 15-year-old on a double Saturday shift at McDonald's, when a woman apparently came in screaming about her child being covered in fecal matter. Turns out, the child was covered in fecal matter. Because the entire PlayPlace was coated in "a huge trail of diarrhea" that was thicker than you could expect or hope."
Revensis' manager quickly put him on the job, with gloves, a roll of paper towels, and some cleaning spray. "I've usually got a pretty strong stomach for these things," he writes, "but the stench was mortifying." And on hot day like that one, the PlayPlace was "filled with these gaseous fumes."
But he made his mind go numb, and for two hours scrubbed everything thoroughly. When he finished, his manager told him to clean the women's bathroom -- someone had thrown up in there. "It's been 5 years since that happened," he writes, "and I haven't even stepped into a McDonald's except for once when I was in the city and needed a place to pee."
One day, when Reddit user chicagocommissar was working the drive-thru, a lady asked if he would come out to the parking lot and do intimate things to her. "When I said no, she threw a large chocolate shake at me," he claims, "and called me a whole bunch of pretty names." Of course, he replied by making a joke about her mom.
That isn't the only poop story McDonald's employees had. Pants8 remembers one fateful day when some genius with an avant garde taste decided to use a plunger as a paint brush, the bathroom as the canvas, and his or her excrement as the paint.
On a separate occasion, pants8 and his or her co-workers were wondering "what the terrible smell was emanating from the bathroom." Turns out someone had done something far less creative; they'd just pooped in the trashcan.
User walaska was working the graveyard shift, when a group of drunk friends came in. When walaska turned back around with the cheeseburger one of the guy's ordered, the guy had dropped his pants and was wiping his genitals on the credit card machine. " So, I politely refused to serve him," walaska writes, "asked him to put his pants back on and got the next person in line to order." In response, the guy wipes his rather unclean hands over walaska's head.
But the guy got his comeuppance. The cooks in the back, many of whom were ex-cons, watched the scene, and quickly pounced out from behind the counter and messed the dudes up a little bit.