We Warned You: Craigslist Roommate Nightmares

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Once again it's time to take a look at those nightmare Craigslist roommate ads that reek of awful living scenarios. Be warned: the telltale signs are right in front of you!

Here are our Top 4 Worst Craigslist Roomate Ads in this week's L.A. Edition:



San Fernando Valley: $730 Huge room and Bath in townhouse in S. F. Valley healthy, toxin-free

Toxins are eliminated with best efforts: household cleaning products, personal grooming and laundry products, artificial fragrance free. Sleep is also healthy: if anyone wants to sleep everyone else will adjust sound volumes down. The kitchen, laundry and backyard are available: just clean them when finished. In general, your lifestyle is your business, as long as it is not imposed on anyone else. Enjoy healthy living for $730. per month. Seeking someone who is: A NONSMOKER, dependable, and is open-minded and kind.

Our Verdict: Somehow I think your lifestyle is not your business in this living scenario. Your new roommate goes by the name, Keswick. I imagine that Keswick carries his belongings in a man-purse, or murse. Expect a cleaning chart that MUST be strictly followed.


West L.A.: $620 Female Roommate Wanted (SMC & UCLA)

I am looking for a roommate who is studious, clean, and knows how to respect others. (It would be great if new roommate is a single. Roommate who has BF or GF always has made troubles so we prefer a single.)

Our Verdict: So basically if you move in, and you are single, and during the course of your living arrangement you happen to get a boyfriend or girlfriend, this will make your new roommates very unhappy. I wonder what kind of trouble past-roommates have caused in the past by having a significant other? Was it a mirror reflection of the current roommates loneliness?


Long Beach: $675 RESPONSIBLE FEMALE ROOMMATE WANTED TO SHARE WONDERFUL APARTMENT
I am looking for a female roommate, mid-to-late 20s, who is either a young professional or serious student. DEPENDABILITY AND FINANCIAL STABILITY ARE MUSTS - rent and utilities MUST be paid on time every month...NO EXCEPTIONS. The perfect roommate for me would be friendly, considerate, responsible, mature, neat and clean, self-sufficient, mellow, and peaceful. My apartment is quiet and extremely clean and organized, so it is VERY important for me to find somebody who will respect me and my home and the way I choose to maintain it. I like the idea of a quiet and peaceful home so please no parties, loud guests, or pets. No smoking, drugs, or heavy drinking please.

Anyone I strongly consider as a potential roommate will first meet the apartment management staff to be interviewed. A successful management interview will lead to an in-person interview with me, possibly accompanied by one of my trusted former-roommates.

Our Verdict: RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! This is the a-typical anal, neat-freak roommate. Expect all the cans of soup in the cupboard to be facing label-side out and in alphabetical order. Not do you have to pass one interview to be chosen as the lucky one to break household bread with this woman, but two: you have to be interviewed by the apartment management staff first. This better be one hell of a great roommate to go through all that bullshizzle.


U.S.C. Area: $400 Room For Rent
Bathroom is cleaned every two days with the cooperation of every tenant.

Sorry for the inconvenience bout not putting a number to call but if you're really interested in the room well come through anytime we'll be home all day and night waiting on you the address is between Normandie and Western We have dogs so just knock on the front gate and we'll come out


Our Verdict: There's something very creepy about the casual come through anytime we'll be home scenario. Why are they home all day and night!? When you move in, will they also be home all day and night!? How does one make a living by being home all day and night? Are they make a hefty living by running a freelance marijuana dispensary?
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