Where's my stimulus check? The IRS speaks!

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As I reported last month, I was supposed to get my economic stimulus check direct deposited some time on or before May 9. But the day came and went and I got absolutamente nada.

I then discovered that the IRS had slipped in a stipulation about how if you had filing fees deducted electronically from your return, your economic stimulus would arrive via paper check. In my case, on or around June 20.

So when I got an envelope from the IRS in today's mail, I got all tingly. Could this be it? And just when I was least expecting it? How delicious!The front of the envelope said "Information about your stimulus check." But the back of the envelope had "Payment" in big red letters. Oh the suspense as I clumsily tried to open it.

Inside, no check. Instead a letter. "Dear Taxpayer: You are entitled to an economic stimulus payment of $1,800 as provided by the Economic Stimulus Act of 2008. You can expect your payment by 6/20/08.

..."If you received a refund on your 2007 federal income tax return and had it directly deposited into a bank account , we will directly deposit your stimulus payment into the same bank account.

Huh. Well, this did not happen. My refund was direct deposited into my regular bank account. But the stimulus pay never showed.

"I read on. "If your tax refund was directly deposited into a refund anticipation loan account, your stimulus payment check will be mailed to you."

I don't even know what a "refund anticipation loan account is." I certainly don't have one.

I looked up this information on the IRS site here, and noted with alarm that the language is a little different. Maybe it's futile trying to parse government-speak, but I'm left feeling a little queasy.

Apparently Big Brother thinks I have a "Refund anticipation loan account" that I do not have. This doesn't bode well for any stimulus check at all, if you ask me. The promise that I can call an IRS number in six weeks to figure it all out, strangely, offers me no comfort.

Will I get my family's economic stimulus check via snail mail by June 20? Somebody throw me some odds...
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